by Geremy Farrell
In order to get these wonderful ladies to marry us, we must have had some streak of romance that swept them off their feet. However, I think we have forgotten this wonderful art (this goes for you wives as well!).
Let's clear one thing up first -- romance doesn't equate to sex!
Romance is a state of mind -- a hypnotic state that overrides common sense, inhibitions and the world.
Those who are being romanced and those doing the romancing will sing in public when they would never sing in the shower, they would dance in an open square with only the music of two heart beats for accompaniment.
Yet we lose this ability and knowledge the longer we are married. Life just seems to get in the way. The romance -- the excitement, the feeling as your heart beats uncontrollably in your mouth, as you count the seconds to be with them again -- seems to flit away.
So if romance has flown the coup, does that mean your marriage is over?
No. It seems to be that when the romance dies, life takes over. We get weighed down with the problems and issues that we once could face head on, because we knew we were loved, we were romanced. There was no mountain high enough and certainly no problem that we could not face.
But if the romance dies, it seems we no longer can face these problems and issues head on. Life becomes "normal."
It's not a failure, or a weakness if romance has gone away. I like to think of it more as a casualty of life.
When you were romanced the world looked better, there was hope when none could be found because we had faith.
The food tasted better as we had someone to share it with.
The sunny days were brighter and the rainy days were for snuggling.
So how can we get romance back?
What can we do to spark the flame that once lit the darkness night?
It's simple! Tell her you love her. Look into her eyes and tell her this. Mean it when you say it! There is never a bad time for hug, or even a kiss.
There are some easy rules to remember: Never kiss her unless you mean it. Never hold her unless you mean it, too. Romance continues with each kiss, with each hug, and every time you say, "I love you" in both actions and words.
Here are some suggestions:
- Buy her a rose and leave it somewhere she'll find it.
- Leave her card or a note.
- Call her from work or wherever you are and just say, "I love you". Let her know that you called her just to tell her that.
When you go home, make sure you let her know she is the number one person in your life. Tell her she has been number one since the first day you met, since the first kiss and she will always be the most important person in your life.
Romance is words. It's actions. It's a touch. It's silence and listening to her heart beat with yours.
Remember to love her, let her know you love her. They say variety is the spice of life, I say romance is the essence of true love.
Now it's time to stop reading, turn the computer off and go tell her you love her!
Geremy is married to Chim and the father of five wonderful kids. Chim has been a pregnancy.org member over 10 amazing years!
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