Unmarried with Children

As more and more people have become aware of the rights denied to gay families, opinion may also change about the rights and needs of unmarried heterosexuals. Some municipalities allow heterosexual couples over age 62 to register as domestic partners, recognizing that remarrying as a senior puts pension and Social Security benefits at risk, however there is yet to be a very productive movement to offer these same rights to younger couples. The more unmarried couples who are open about their arrangement, the sooner public opinion will change.

Brette Sember is a former family law attorney and author of Unmarried with Children: The Complete Guide for Unmarried Families (Adams Media, 2008). Learn more at UnmarriedWithChildren.net.

Copyright © Brette Sember. Permission to publish granted to Pregnancy.org, LLC.


Wow congratulations guys! I hope that you can raise your child in a right and proper way. I am proud of you because there are some couple who are trying to have a cohabitation agreements for them to have an assurance that their partner will sustain the needs of the baby but without knowing that it has a disadvantage that thinking about and talking through all the issues that should be covered – including death, divorce, and illness, often involve long, hard work. But talking about the terms of a contract could be looked on as a massive plus to a relationship, showing that it is mature enough to work through major decisions.

My SO and I have been together for a little more than a year. We're happily un-married. He has shown interest in marrying one day but I'm the one not really willing to budge much. Maybe one day - but not now. We've both been married before & I just can't see a real good reason behind it.
We haven't told many people about our "bun in the oven" but that's only because we're at 12 weeks right now and I've had complications with pregnancies in the past. But I'm sure the opinions will come pouring in once folks find out.

Thanks for this article! We are in that 41% and have been together for 10+ years. So far I have had someone ask me if I thought about giving it up/not keeping it, and another is now calling my man the "baby daddy". Both were people I considered friends but now I think they are not so awesome. People are really ignorant and cruel.

We're in our 30's and this really shouldn't be a big shocker after so many years. I am shocked by people's lack of thought about what they are saying.