Mourning

Well, I had my first appointment last Tuesday. There was no baby on the ultrasound. Only a gestational sack that had stopped developing at 5 weeks and two cysts on my ovary... AFter the appointment I spotted, dark blood. I cried the rest of the afternoon. I didn't want to go out anywhere; I felt too unstable. I woke up in the middle of the night and cried for a long time. Paul took Wednesday off because we were supposed to get blood work results. They never called. We got the results on Thursday when I went to get more blood work. HCG was at 5,000. I knew it wasn't a good number, but I didn't contradict the nurse. She was trying to be positive. Thursday night I spotted again. Followed by Friday morning when I called my ob. The nurse who answered the phone thought I was calling for the blood results. I told her actually, I didn't need to know them as I was spotting. She was very quiet and told me doc was in with a patient. She asked how long, how much, and what color. I told her dark purple I again was greeted with silence for a few seconds followed by she will take my chart and stand outside the door. I got a call back form my ob within 5 minutes.

She told me what was happening and that my hcg levels were decreasing from 5,000 they'd been on Tuesday to 3,000 on Thursday. Blighted ovum happens in about 1 out of 5 pregnancies. They baby never develops. She couldn't guarantee it wouldn't happen again, but that it usually only happens once. She did think it was odd since I have a child already. She explained my options since I was not soo far along were a d and c or letting things go naturally. Since I had started spotting on my own, my body was trying to fix itself. She perscribed me darvocet. Said she was very sorry. She also made it clear I could call the office for anything I needed. I didn't have to make any decision right then, and I could change my mind. She told me to wait for 3 cycles before trying again.