awesome_ash's picture

i know i'm young, and not financially prepared for a child. but it feels like i'll never have one, and its a horrible feeling. i dream almost every night about these beautiful infants that i get to hold and love on all i want because they are mine and then i wake up, realize it was only a dream, and cry there with empty arms. its frustrating, really. i see my friends and their babies and i see all these happy mommies on tv and it kills me. i want this so bad. but i can't find anyone who wants to have a baby, even if there were no ties required, i mean its not like i would ask for child support or anything. all i want is a child of my own, i want that love so much. and apart from that obsticle, i have a very irregular cycle...and right now, no cycle at all. i don't remember my last period but i wanna say march or april and it is now september. if i can't be a mommy, can the dreams at least stop?