Sandy's Surprise -- Worried About Attachment To This Baby?

Read All of Sandy's Surprise -- A Pregnancy Journal

I was doing some research online and found this article that said at 13 weeks they can guesstimate with about 80% accuracy the sex of the baby. It's just totally dependent on the doctor if they want to do that or not. I'm thinking we'll probably get a doctor who does not want to make a guess.

Tim said that technicians would be more likely to guess, since the doctors have more to lose (in the way of credibility, someone suing, etc.). He's probably right. I checked, and we're definitely going to have a doctor, not a technician. Oh well, I can wait another 7 weeks after the NT scan to find out! (I think.)

They moved my appointment back 2 hours on Monday. Some lady needed to come in for some semi-urgent procedure so I gave up my spot. It's not like ours is an emergency. Maybe I can convince Tim to take me to a nice restaurant for lunch since we'll have two extra hours to kill.

My neighbor, who's a Bradley instructor, brought me all these books to read about childbirth. She's so nice! We're going to be taking her class in August. She does them right out of her home, so all we have to do is go across the street.

So far I haven't told anyone I want to do this naturally. I don't want to deal with all the "Are you crazy? You don't know what you're in for!" talks that been-there-done-that moms sometimes think they're obligated to give. So I'm just smiling and nodding when someone mentions epidurals.

Actually, until about two weeks ago, I did expect to do this with epidurals and all the drugs possible. But then I really thought about it, and realized that I don't even take Tylenol because I don't want that in my body when the baby's in there too.

So I really started to think about what I want out of my birthing experience, and that's when I read about husband-coached childbirth.

I've posted on the birthing naturally board. They are so knowledgeable and helpful over there! Reading those birth stories gives me a lot of hope that I can handle natural child birth!

Lunch is ready, I'll be back later!

This has been weighing on my mind lately. I debated posting about it here for fear that someone might not understand what I'm trying to say, but then I figured, ah well. I still want to get it off my chest.

I'm a little worried about my attachment to this baby. I mean, I care immensely about this baby and I only want good things for it. But I'm not so sure I have a lot of love for it yet. I read all these things about maternal love, and I know I don't feel anywhere near that for this baby. Is that normal at this stage?

I guess whenever I pictured myself pregnant, I always imagined being madly in love with the baby right from the start. And now that it hasn't happened that way, I'm a little concerned.

I definitely don't feel that there is a baby in there yet. I know it logically, and all my symptoms make me believe it, but I don't know it with my heart yet, I guess. Can't wait to feel those first flutters!

Ah, feels good to get that out there. Anyway, time to go get ready for my sub job! Be back later!