Are all 2 yr old hyper?

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raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347
Are all 2 yr old hyper?

Our nephew is living with us right now (DH's parents, brother, brother's GF, and nephew all are) and I swear this kid has more energy than I've ever seen!

He is usually up around 9-10AM, has a small nap sometimes around 3PM, then he's non-stop ALL NIGHT! Last night he was running up and down the living room back and forth until almost 12AM! (Yes, his parents let him do this...don't ask...I don't get it)

Is this normal for a 2 yr old?? They've been living with us since August and he's always like this!

Audgee's picture
Joined: 08/24/05
Posts: 305

I can't speak for all 2 Year olds.....but mine will get up between 7 and 8am, has a 2-3 hour nap most days around 1-2pm, and is in bed asleep between 7 and 8 pm
He doesn't nap as consistently as he used to - so skipping them is okay - but running around like crazy at night....not so normal....

My girlfriend's son used to get crazy busy at night and she realized that (as funny as it sounds) it was because he was overtired.

The 12AM sounds so late to me, but then that's not my schedule. I had a friend who kept her kids up late, because she liked that they slept in later in the mornings.....not sure how well that has worked out for her now that they are both in school.....I personally prefer my kids to be in bed to give me some quiet time before I go to bed

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

I personally don't get it at all, but I'm not a night person. I like to have my house quiet, cleaned up, and dark by 8PM and I like to be in bed by 9PM.

Having them around is really stressing me out! Last night I just wanted quiet time but everyone was awake and talking and TV blaring and kid running up and down the living room. Ug....They were supposed to move out Sept 1 but couldn't find a place, same for Oct 1 and Nov 1, but alas...no place yet. Sad

I suspect he's overtired but eh...I'm not his parent.

Audgee's picture
Joined: 08/24/05
Posts: 305

That has to be tough! Thats a lot of extra people to have in your house! Especially if they have such different habits then you!

I hope they find something in enough time to have some quiet time before baby comes!

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4100

ITA with Audrey that he sounds like he's very overtired. Kids that age need 10-11 hours of sleep at night with another 1-2 hours nap for a total of 12 hours a day. He's getting 9, maybe 10??? No wonder the poor thing is bouncing off the walls! :shock: He should still be getting a regular nap or rest time at that age, too. My DS started refusing to nap when he was two; we started calling it a "siesta" and he could look at a book or play with a quiet toy if he wanted, with his head on the pillow, for 90 minutes. If he did eventually fall asleep, we'd let him sleep for up to an hour and then wake him up if he didn't wake on his own.

I would speak up about this because it's his health at stake, and yours as well. It doesn't matter that you aren't the parent. It's your house, and you need to set some ground rules, especially now that you're pregnant. If they are going to stay there any longer, then they simpy must get him to bed at a decent time, if for no other reason than so that you can get the rest you need. And I'd add that you should probably set a new ending date for them to move out and *enforce* it. If that can't happen for a *very* good reason, then they at least owe you the courtesy of making their presence as peaceful for you as possible.

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

I would say it depends on the child, for normalness. My oldest goes to bed easily around 7:30-8pm and is up every day by 7, that is enough sleep for him. My middle is very high needs (some people might describe him as spirited) and he HATES sleep. He only sleeps when he is absolutely exhausted, he never admits to being tired, and if you put him in bed at 8 he stays up talking in bed for at least 2 hours. He hasn't napped since before he was 2, and really the only time he ever naps is if he falls asleep in the car or the stroller on a walk. It is very taxing on both my husband and I, but there isn't really much we can do, other than try our best to tire him out during the day. The situation is not ideal, because we find we are up late with him and then woken early by my 5 year old. However, there is not a lot we can do, we cannot force him to sleep, and we have spent a lot of time working with him to stay in his bed after bedtime.

So it might be very tough, for your DHs brother and his partner as well. They might just not know what to do with him. Some kids natural rhythms are to stay up late and sleep in (and honestly, my kids are up much earlier then he is, I think my 3.5 year old gets about as much sleep as him) It also sounds like a really difficult situation having so many of DHs family members living with you, that would be an annoying situation in it's own right.

I know before I had kids I had a lot of opinions of how kids should be (I mean behaviour wise, crying, sleep etc) In the end, after having 3 kids of my own I have had to give up the idea that children are "bad" because of "bad" parenting. Sometimes children are just difficult (or spirited, the more PC way of putting it) I have a child like this, and a child who is your average, well behaved kid, and I have to tell you, we basically raised them the same way, they are just different kids with different needs.

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4100

"knhoward" wrote:

I would say it depends on the child, for normalness. My oldest goes to bed easily around 7:30-8pm and is up every day by 7, that is enough sleep for him. My middle is very high needs (some people might describe him as spirited) and he HATES sleep. He only sleeps when he is absolutely exhausted, he never admits to being tired, and if you put him in bed at 8 he stays up talking in bed for at least 2 hours. He hasn't napped since before he was 2, and really the only time he ever naps is if he falls asleep in the car or the stroller on a walk. It is very taxing on both my husband and I, but there isn't really much we can do, other than try our best to tire him out during the day. The situation is not ideal, because we find we are up late with him and then woken early by my 5 year old. However, there is not a lot we can do, we cannot force him to sleep, and we have spent a lot of time working with him to stay in his bed after bedtime.

So it might be very tough, for your DHs brother and his partner as well. They might just not know what to do with him. Some kids natural rhythms are to stay up late and sleep in (and honestly, my kids are up much earlier then he is, I think my 3.5 year old gets about as much sleep as him) It also sounds like a really difficult situation having so many of DHs family members living with you, that would be an annoying situation in it's own right.

I know before I had kids I had a lot of opinions of how kids should be (I mean behaviour wise, crying, sleep etc) In the end, after having 3 kids of my own I have had to give up the idea that children are "bad" because of "bad" parenting. Sometimes children are just difficult (or spirited, the more PC way of putting it) I have a child like this, and a child who is your average, well behaved kid, and I have to tell you, we basically raised them the same way, they are just different kids with different needs.

I have to take issue with a couple of things here. To the first bolded: There actually are a *lot* of things you can do to help a child get to sleep. Lie down with him. Give him some warm milk. Turn the lights down low, not off. Give him a warm bath with some calming lavendar bath soap. Or avoid a bedtime bath if that revs him up & go with a washcloth wipe-down instead. Introduce a lovey that stays in bed. Set a predictable & reliable bedtime routine. Cut out sugar & refined foods. Make sure he gets plenty of exercise early in the day. Give him a massage at bedtime. Play some soft music that slowly fades out. Talk him through some simple relaxation exercises. Little kids just don't naturally lie down quietly & go to sleep on their own; they need to be parented to sleep. My son is four and I still regularly do one or two of these with him every night. He goes to sleep on his own maybe once or twice a week. At the age of two, there's no way I would expect a child to just lie down and go to sleep.

To the second bolded: The issue here isn't the child's natural rythyms. The issue is that the child is not getting enough sleep. Period. If he was sleeping from midnight to noon, I'd have no problem with that if it worked for his family. But he's sleeping from midnight until 9am and rarely napping, and that is just simply not enough sleep for a 2yo. The poor thing is exhausted and he doesn't know how to put himself to sleep and the grownups in his life apparently aren't helping him learn; they're just letting him run himself ragged instead. And I *would* call that bad parenting, not to a relative's face, at least not at first, but I'd definitely be thinking it.

ChristaM's picture
Joined: 01/11/04
Posts: 713

Ok; I'm going to add a few things. My DD has ADHD; she has difficulty with sleep. She didn't sleep through the night until 18 months. She has a hard time falling asleep and is consistently up early. She struggled with naps and even as an infant my mother-in-law said she had never seen a baby sleep so little. She goes to bed at 8 and it's not unusual for her to be awake at 10ish and she is usually up by 5-6am.

Agree with Spacers that there are things you can try. In addition to what was already mentioned, I was told by the neurologist to give her melatonin at night about 30 minutes before bed. Its a chewable mint tablet that she likes! It has helped, but of course is not a cure all. She sleeps with no night light, gets a bedtime CD that once it's done thats it, we tuck her in bed with snug blankets (tucked in the mattress), etc. A calming environment at least one hour before bed also helps.

So, essentially, no - not every 2 year old is so hyper. But, of course several things could be influencing this particular child. If it is a medical condition such as ADHD then he's too young to diagnose. But, if it's more environmental, there are things that can be done.

In any case, I think you need to have a heart to heart with the house guests and set up some ground rules for the remainder of their "visit". It's still your home and you have a right to not be stressed.

Good luck!

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Yeah, it's a tough situation overall right now. They are living with us because if they weren't...well...they would be homeless effectively (or have to move back to the east coast). We've tried setting deadlines for them to move out but a) they had trouble finding jobs to save up the amount they need for first/last rental deposit and b) rental market where we live is hard as they are looking for a 3 bedroom apartment or house that allows dogs which is few and far between. I've already warned DH that if they aren't out soon I may go postal because I'm going insane having them there. And if they aren't gone and ruin my dream of having a home birth (which I'm not about to do while they are there) then I will regret it for the rest of my life and DH will not hear the end of it. But...that's aside from the point of this thread!

I agree that they don't have the best routines.

BIL's GF is very young and immature. She spends all day on her phone or the computer ignoring the child, letting him do whatever he wants, leaving him in front of the TV on Disney kids channel. I know he's a child, but they are guests in our house and in my opinion she should be watching him at least. She lets him eat food and spill on our couch, she has let him "draw" on our tv with dirty hands, I have found crayon on my antique drop leg table, not to mention the scratches on our nice (just installed before we bought the house last year) maple hard wood floor from him running his toys into it... She never leaves the house, never sits with him, never tries to teach him anything, never reads a book to him. We have a school right behind us with a huge park but she won't get off her butt and take him. Heck, we live 1 KM walk away from a large urban outdoor park with paths, petting zoo, free indoor plant...thingy (can't think of the word, glass enclosed area with tropical plants you can walk through), tea house, pond, water park, etc. She won't even walk to the drug store at the end of our road, she makes BIL drive her when they need to go. It's literally 10 houses away, then across a road!!

BIL is....impatient (and one of the reasons I didn't want him there originally was because he has anger issues and is verbally and physically abusive). He has no patience for this kid. He yells at him whenever he doesn't do something right, or when he doesn't listen. He will pick him up and physically force him to sit on the couch if he's not listening (sometimes by one arm and not in a nice way).

Combine that together and I think they don't really know how to deal with the child. When they try to get him to do anything he pulls a tantrum. They force him to have a bath every other night even though he screams the entire time. At nap time and bed time they just put him in the pack n play (they didn't bring up a crib or bed with them so we bought them a pack n play to use at our house) and let him CIO for an hour sometimes. He will be screaming. They are staying in our basement so I don't know if they turn off the lights or whatnot. I can hear him all the way on the second floor. Eventually he passes out I gather, I don't know.

It's just sad really. DH thinks it's normal though and doesn't believe me when I tell him it's not. I won't approach his family about it, and I've asked DH to bring it up, but he won't as he says it's not his business. DH is in the "stay up late" camp and very hyper himself so it's hard to explain to him that I want it to be quiet time after a certain hour. Everyone in his family stays up late, chats, keeps all the lights on (huge pet peeve of mine), leaves the TV on loud, leaves the front door open and the curtains open so everyone in the world can see in our house (another HUGE pet peeve of mine). He says it's just how they are "down east". I just don't get it. Different culture I guess. When I grew up we weren't allowed to leave lights on or have loud TV late at night. Our house was always quiet and calm.

I really just hope they find a place and get out soon (and I feel a little sorry for DH's parents who have agreed to rent with BIL and GF and child). I need the stress of all this gone. I can't deal with this hyper screaming child much longer. I'm really depressed about it. DH got us a TV for our bedroom so I have somewhere at least to hide now, but I feel like a prisoner with no control over anything anymore. All my things are being touched and broken and ruined and no one seems to care. DH thinks it's ok if something gets broken if you can replace it, but he doesn't get that I don't like that. One of our nice ceramic roasting dishes got broken the other night at dinner because MIL put it on the stove top where an element had been on. She didn't do it on purpose, but it was a wedding gift and I'm very heartbroken over it. Yes, I know I'm sentimental...it's just a roasting dish but still...

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Sorry, didn't mean to vent there, just having a hard day. It's sad that I would rather be at work than home right now. I'm really thinking they won't find a house for November 1 which means the next rental period is Dec 1 and that just makes me cry....I don't think I can do another month of this.

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4100

:bighug:

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this mess when you should be getting your home set up for your own birth. Tell them you'll watch the dog if they get an apartment that doesn't allow them. Or a lot of times you can rent with a dog if you're willing to put up extra damage deposit and if the dog is well-bahaved. Offer to write a nice reference letter for how great & quiet the dog is and help them with extra deposit money. At the very least, make them leave for a few days when you're in labor. Certainly they can afford a couple of nights in a motel if they aren't paying rent.

Another thought is to call your local social services office and see if you can get a social worker involved. You should be able to do it anonymously. If you can hear the poor boy crying up two floors, then neighbors can probably hear him, too. Sad

And one final thought: find a place for them. :shock: Get on Craigslist, or copy things from wherever rentals are posted in your area, and send them every single thing you find that might work. Call for more information & leave their phone number, put their email address in as the contact. Use your network. Let everyone you know know that you're looking for a 2- or 3-bedroom apartment that takes dogs. Post a "home wanted" notice in your church bulletin or the Masons newsletter or anywhere else you can.

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

"Spacers" wrote:

I have to take issue with a couple of things here. To the first bolded: There actually are a *lot* of things you can do to help a child get to sleep. Lie down with him. Give him some warm milk. Turn the lights down low, not off. Give him a warm bath with some calming lavendar bath soap. Or avoid a bedtime bath if that revs him up & go with a washcloth wipe-down instead. Introduce a lovey that stays in bed. Set a predictable & reliable bedtime routine. Cut out sugar & refined foods. Make sure he gets plenty of exercise early in the day. Give him a massage at bedtime. Play some soft music that slowly fades out. Talk him through some simple relaxation exercises. Little kids just don't naturally lie down quietly & go to sleep on their own; they need to be parented to sleep. My son is four and I still regularly do one or two of these with him every night. He goes to sleep on his own maybe once or twice a week. At the age of two, there's no way I would expect a child to just lie down and go to sleep.

To the second bolded: The issue here isn't the child's natural rythyms. The issue is that the child is not getting enough sleep. Period. If he was sleeping from midnight to noon, I'd have no problem with that if it worked for his family. But he's sleeping from midnight until 9am and rarely napping, and that is just simply not enough sleep for a 2yo. The poor thing is exhausted and he doesn't know how to put himself to sleep and the grownups in his life apparently aren't helping him learn; they're just letting him run himself ragged instead. And I *would* call that bad parenting, not to a relative's face, at least not at first, but I'd definitely be thinking it.

Oh trust me, we've tried it all (the things you've mentioned), he will not sleep, regardless of us staying with him, warm milk, baths, relaxing etc etc. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. Perhaps he would sleep if we drugged him, but we don't. You make the assumption that my child eats a lot of sugar, he does not! Until you have been in the situation with a child you do not know, unfortunately. And we don't expect him to just go lay in bed by himself, we have quite a bedtime routine with him that involves the usual hygiene items, bedtime story, drink, cuddles in bed, lullaby etc. After months of hard work he now stays in his bed, usually talking or playing quietly, he passes out when he wants to.

I don't obviously know anything about Rachael's family and their parenting, she hasn't given a lot of info, but things aren't always so cut-and-dry as you make them out to be, and to simply state that "I" am not doing enough to help my child sleep is just not true. This child may have special needs, he is 2, most kids do not have a diagnosis at that age. I have friends who has a son who slept horribly, from very early on, that had diagnosis of Aspergers as well as ADHD at the age of 5 or 6. There were reasons (not parental ones) that the child could not sleep, he now uses Melatonin which helps a lot. This friend has 2 other children, who are great sleepers. You can't always blame the parents Spacers (sorry I don't know your name)

ETA: I didn't get to Rachael's next post before I typed this, so this doesn't seem to really apply as it sounds like the parents just aren't doing a very good job. I think what I say still applies in some cases (just not this one, unfortunately)

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

Rachael - I am sorry you are dealing with such awful relatives. It sounds like they aren't really responsible enough to have a child of their own. It sounds like he is really neglected all day. Perhaps spending hours in front of the TV doesn't set him up well for being tired at night and sleeping, among numerous other issues Sad

I actually kind of feel sorry for the child now, after reading your vent. You have every right to be angry about it.

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Thanks. It is hard right now. I'm on a later shift this week so I didn't get home until 7:30PM. I went to our room and found 4 accidents (3 poop, 1 pee) from their chihuahua on our bedroom floor (the bedroom I spent all last weekend cleaning top to bottom!) So, she doesn't only ignore her child during the day, she ignores her dog too.

That was the start of a horrible night. It sent me into a spiral of depression that I just can't kick today still. I went and had dinner but couldn't cope with being in the living room with the GF or the 2 yr old. He was misbehaving and she was ignoring him still. Then he got a hold of my label maker (a nice computerized one that I use heavily and love) and she didn't even care and I just couldn't take it anymore. I grabbed it and went and hid in my bedroom and cried for 3 hours on and off. The entire time (until at least 11:30PM) I could hear him running up and down the living room, screaming, yelling, running something (no idea what) across my floor that was loud and sounded damaging. We live in a town house and I'm surprised the neighbours didn't complain or call the police it was so loud.

When DH came to bed I told him I couldn't take it anymore. My parents know how crazy it is at our house and have offered for me to come stay with them for a bit if I want. I told DH I'm seriously considering taking them up on it as I can't take the stress anymore. It's at a point of them or me and I hate to do that, but I can't do it anymore. Either they leave, or I do.

It was obvious the child was overtired so I don't know why she didn't put him to bed??? It baffles me!! I'm beginning to think she just doesn't know how to get him to bed!! Then when BIL got home (maybe she was waiting for him) all he did was provoke the child over and over. DH was mad too, all he wanted to do was watch hockey in the same room and he was annoyed that the stress of the situation meant I didn't stay down and watch with him.

*sigh*....

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

"raingirl28" wrote:

Thanks. It is hard right now. I'm on a later shift this week so I didn't get home until 7:30PM. I went to our room and found 4 accidents (3 poop, 1 pee) from their chihuahua on our bedroom floor (the bedroom I spent all last weekend cleaning top to bottom!) So, she doesn't only ignore her child during the day, she ignores her dog too.

That was the start of a horrible night. It sent me into a spiral of depression that I just can't kick today still. I went and had dinner but couldn't cope with being in the living room with the GF or the 2 yr old. He was misbehaving and she was ignoring him still. Then he got a hold of my label maker (a nice computerized one that I use heavily and love) and she didn't even care and I just couldn't take it anymore. I grabbed it and went and hid in my bedroom and cried for 3 hours on and off. The entire time (until at least 11:30PM) I could hear him running up and down the living room, screaming, yelling, running something (no idea what) across my floor that was loud and sounded damaging. We live in a town house and I'm surprised the neighbours didn't complain or call the police it was so loud.

When DH came to bed I told him I couldn't take it anymore. My parents know how crazy it is at our house and have offered for me to come stay with them for a bit if I want. I told DH I'm seriously considering taking them up on it as I can't take the stress anymore. It's at a point of them or me and I hate to do that, but I can't do it anymore. Either they leave, or I do.

It was obvious the child was overtired so I don't know why she didn't put him to bed??? It baffles me!! I'm beginning to think she just doesn't know how to get him to bed!! Then when BIL got home (maybe she was waiting for him) all he did was provoke the child over and over. DH was mad too, all he wanted to do was watch hockey in the same room and he was annoyed that the stress of the situation meant I didn't stay down and watch with him.

*sigh*....

Yeah, your DH needs to step up and kick them out, and likely get F&CS involved for the child's sake. I bet the child is acting out to get attention, since it seems like his mom totally ignores him and doesn't want to do anything for him. Things are only going to get worse and higher stress when you have a new baby in the house, it sounds to me like they really need to be out, maybe even if it is to stay in a shelter, maybe that will give them the push they need.

MissyJ's picture
Joined: 01/31/02
Posts: 3218

Rachael

I am so sorry that you are dealing with this vs being allowed to relax, enjoy your pregnancy and this time with your dh as a couple before babe's arrival.

Tell dh you'll run around naked if he gets them out. Blum 3

I like the idea of suggesting that they leave the dog behind -- either with you or maybe find a home that would provide temp housing since it is a smaller dog. I would definitely be joining in to help finding a place to rent.

I did have one question. Here you can move in anytime. They simply prorate if the rental agreement is set for the 1st or 15th of the month. Is that not allowed where you live?

(((((((HUGS))))))) I know you don't want to feel forced out of your home. I do believe though that some clear boundaries are needed for you all to be able to continue to make the best of this situation. Perhaps you can draft a set of 'house rules' and go over them first with your dh. These are NOT unreasonable requests as you all are attempting to share your household. Part of the agreement (for me) would incl. some real efforts for job / home finding.

PLEASE feel free to vent here as much as you want and/or need!

Danifo's picture
Joined: 09/07/10
Posts: 1377

I just have to say, I would find having any guests that long hard. Guests with an out of control child and a dog would be impossible.

We did rent our place in the GTA from the 20th of the month. Our lease is just set up so that our rent is due on the 20th. As long as the place is empty, you can get in anytime.

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

"Danifo" wrote:

I just have to say, I would find having any guests that long hard. Guests with an out of control child and a dog would be impossible.

We did rent our place in the GTA from the 20th of the month. Our lease is just set up so that our rent is due on the 20th. As long as the place is empty, you can get in anytime.

When landlords have a place empty they are generally very happy to rent it out, because no renters = no income. They will prorate for the month generally, at least in my experience.

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

I'm in Brampton (if it matters) and so far they haven't been able to find anything that's 3 bedroom and would allow 4 adults, a 2 yr old, and 2 dogs.....and they are smokers. I presume they would smoke outside if it's a smoke-free place but if I know landlords, as soon as they say they smoke (even if they say outside) they would be denied. And most of the ads I see are 1 or 2 bedroom. 3 bedroom are few and far between (or outside their price range). They may need to suck it up and put the 2 yr old in the bedroom with his parents. Or find separate houses?

Everything I've been looking at today is no dogs/no pets. Not one ad that allows pets....

Heck, they have so much going against them right now. All their IDs are still from NB, they only just started new jobs that are just temp jobs (not permanent) so hard to get letters to prove employment. With very little employment to document in the last two years either (east coast job market is horrid), bad credit, and all ID from NB, as a landlord would you risk renting to them??

They had found a place that they liked but they required 2 pieces of photo ID which none of them have. Heck, even I don't have two pieces of photo ID (I have an old health card so only have my drivers license). Who asks for 2 pieces of photo ID these days??

knhoward's picture
Joined: 04/22/08
Posts: 999

"raingirl28" wrote:

...

They had found a place that they liked but they required 2 pieces of photo ID which none of them have. Heck, even I don't have two pieces of photo ID (I have an old health card so only have my drivers license). Who asks for 2 pieces of photo ID these days??

They can get a BYID card (from the liquor store) They could also get a new photo health card. Of course a passport is an option too, but that is more expensive.

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

True, they could eventually. But for now I can't wait that long for them to move out. Wink

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

*sigh* I posted a tangent vent over on the January 2014 board. DH and I can't win....

MissyJ's picture
Joined: 01/31/02
Posts: 3218

((((((HUGS))))))) to you and your dh.

I'm so sorry. I have to say that it sounds like his parents are using emotionally charged (and somewhat abusive) language in order to try and manipulate your dh. Absolutely they are trying to make him 'choose' because then they can play the victim card.

I realize that this may be a long shot but one of the recommendations that we have made for families dealing with similar 'abusive' relationships is to reach out for couples counseling to help you both gain the tools and resources needed with dealing with this type of bullying behavior. Again - this is NOT because you and your dh are having marital problems but instead working TOGETHER to face this huge challenge. Even being able to share a phone consultation to seek advice could be worthwhile.

Unfortunately (and quite honestly) it sounds as if this crew will continue using and draining your dh's (and YOUR!) generosity until it is depleted and then they will move on to prey on someone new.

Sending you continued positive thoughts and prayers that you both can get some relief soon!

~Missy

mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

If they have been in Ontario for 3 months they qualify for OHIP (or whatever the name is now) and can get their health cards. I do find it strange to want 2 pieces of photo id, then again I did get asked for 2 pieces one time for a job and my government employee id worked for that.

Sounds like they need to move out here. There are tons of jobs and a lot of people are from the East coast.

raingirl28's picture
Joined: 09/03/07
Posts: 1347

Margaret, FIL and BIL were out there a few times over the last few years, but they didn't like it I guess (not really sure the details of why they went back east). I admit it would be better out there, lots of jobs in construction and reno which is what they do, especially after the Calgary flood. DH's uncle has a fishing boat in the spring/summer/fall but instead of going on seasonal EI (like most east coasters) in winter, he goes out west to work.