So so sad Praying they make some sort of recovery!
Me - Kristi, 29
DD - Leia, July 5 2008
I luurrrrrve to lurk!
Anna - Thank you so much for your response. No that helps a lot because Christian is in that angry rebellious teenage mode to some degree anyway so he doesn't talk much. I know he did talk to someone (one of my friends) though who said he's VERY VERY VERY angry (and that's putting it really mildly). So knowing that helps a lot.
Christian has a friend who calls me mom, spends the holidays with us, and is truly a part of our family. His name is Jason. He is taking it even worse than Christian. He's extremely depressed. So much so he landed in the hospital for a couple days. I truly do love that kid like my own. We all say to everyone we adopted him. It does confuse people who know us prior to him. Anyway, he too was one of those that believes he would would have normally been with them. I explained to him grief is a process and that he should fight the process. I tried to explain that he's going to have really bad days. And eventually they will turn into good days, but out of no where emotion is going to come and smack him upside the head. I said this is something that you never "get over". It stays with you. I told him when he feels sad it's time to come hang out with mom. Honestly he's spent the last several days with us.
The memorial service is Saturday.
Please watch your son carefully for signs of depression. He may need professional help and/or medication to help get through this. ITA with everything MissyJ said about helping channel his anger in a productive way, but sometimes that's not enough. Suicide risk is very high among teenaged boys who have lost a close friend. You don't want him to become another statistic.
My mother lost her husband suddenly & unexpectedly, and she once asked me if I thought the hole in her heart would ever heal. I said no, I didn't think it ever would, but that I thought she would, with time, start to build bridges over it and fences around it so she didn't fall into it quite so much. She said later that that analogy was far more helpful to her than anything anyone else said. It acknowledges that the hurt *will* always be there (and IMHO it should, because that shows just how meaningful that person was to you, kwim?) but it won't always hurt so much.
David Letterman is retiring. Such great memories of watching him over the past thirty-two years!