Co-Sleeping Part II...III and maybe even IV!

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Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314
Co-Sleeping Part II...III and maybe even IV!

HELP ME!!!!! I've brought this up before but I'm at it again...sorry! I am at the end of my rope here. Jay WILL NOT sleep without a boob in his mouth. Even naps have become impossible for the same reason. Is this something that will work itself out or am I just digging myself deeper and deeper by continually allowing it? I feel like it is definitely getting worse and not better. I just don't know what to do....my plan was to kick JH out of his crib this weekend and move it into my teeny-tiny bedroom and try to start getting Jay used to sleeping in the crib, but the boy screams bloody murder the moment I set him down and mommy just can't take it! I let him cry for nearly an hour a couple months ago and he never calmed down, never stopped and I just decided there was no way I can ever do that again....but should I???? I NEED SLEEP! 7 months??? C'mon??? Doesn't he need sleep too?? How can he be getting good sleep when he's sucking continually all night? Does anyone have any advice or words of wisdom here???

I need some apple pie....

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

jennifer......(((((((((((((((HUGE HUGS MOMMA))))))))))))))))))))))))))
have you tried a pacifier??? maybe very gently break his latch and try to stick a paci in his mouth......get him used to that while he is still sleeping with you, and then maybe try the transition??? i'd be at wits end, too......when i was younger, a crying baby didn't seem to bother me......but now, i can feel the gray hairs popping out as jack cries.......but jack cries to release the last bit of his energy, then konks out.....it sounds like jay just cries and escalates........CIO will not work for him, and you two will just both be miserable.......
i'm sure you've tried everything......i wish i had a better suggestion.........jack has nights he sleeps awesome, and then he goes weeks on end with multiple wakeups.......but he's not attached to me so maybe that is why his multiple wakings don't seem to bother me........i can nurse him and put him down.........i would think the longer you keep doing it, yoru just reinforcing the habit.....can you pump and have your husband do the night feedings on a night he doesn't have to go to work??? and see if jay just being away from you is enough to get him to sleep??? you probably won't sleep either, but if you can slowly break jays NEED for mommy....
i don't know......i'm so sorry your at wits end.........and here i thought jack rolling and needing to be flipped 800 times in the night was a big deal......(((((((HUGS)))))))))

EmilyC3's picture
Joined: 10/27/07
Posts: 1170

I think Colleen had some great advice so I don't really have anything to add. Just wanted to offer :bigarmhug: That must be so hard on you!

luangwa's picture
Joined: 06/29/07
Posts: 8898

Jenn, :bighug: Momma!!!!!!! I second the pacifier. I'd buy one of each brand. And I'd be more stubborn about getting him to take it then he is about rejecting them.

Also, I'd tell DH if he didn't want to be a single dad then he has to help break this cycle. It would be a little easier if DH learned how to pacify him and it would be of great benefit if Jay would accept someone else pacifying him.

Jordan went through this with Fi. Maybe she'll see this and stop in. She's been hanging out on the May 10 board, though.

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"toothy35" wrote:

jennifer......(((((((((((((((HUGE HUGS MOMMA))))))))))))))))))))))))))
have you tried a pacifier??? maybe very gently break his latch and try to stick a paci in his mouth......get him used to that while he is still sleeping with you, and then maybe try the transition??? i'd be at wits end, too......when i was younger, a crying baby didn't seem to bother me......but now, i can feel the gray hairs popping out as jack cries.......but jack cries to release the last bit of his energy, then konks out.....it sounds like jay just cries and escalates........CIO will not work for him, and you two will just both be miserable.......
i'm sure you've tried everything......i wish i had a better suggestion.........jack has nights he sleeps awesome, and then he goes weeks on end with multiple wakeups.......but he's not attached to me so maybe that is why his multiple wakings don't seem to bother me........i can nurse him and put him down.........i would think the longer you keep doing it, yoru just reinforcing the habit.....can you pump and have your husband do the night feedings on a night he doesn't have to go to work??? and see if jay just being away from you is enough to get him to sleep??? you probably won't sleep either, but if you can slowly break jays NEED for mommy....
i don't know......i'm so sorry your at wits end.........and here i thought jack rolling and needing to be flipped 800 times in the night was a big deal......(((((((HUGS)))))))))

He won't take a pacifier at all. Spits it out or even purses his lips when I try. Same with a bottle...I've tried pumping and giving it to him in a bottle and the milk always gets wasted...never fails. He's just so frickin stubborn!! But I'll try it again...I'm at the point where I have to start re-trying all the things that didn't work and see if anything has changed. John Henry never co-slept and waking in the night was not too big a deal, he'd eat...I'd lay him back down and he'd sleep again...I got used to it. And Jack rolling all night and not being able to roll back IS a big deal too!! That would be maddening for me as well! He's getting so big and mobile now, I don't think this stage is going to last too long for ya....fingers crossed....

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"luangwa" wrote:

Jenn, :bighug: Momma!!!!!!! I second the pacifier. I'd buy one of each brand. And I'd be more stubborn about getting him to take it then he is about rejecting them.

Also, I'd tell DH if he didn't want to be a single dad then he has to help break this cycle. It would be a little easier if DH learned how to pacify him and it would be of great benefit if Jay would accept someone else pacifying him.

Jordan went through this with Fi. Maybe she'll see this and stop in. She's been hanging out on the May 10 board, though.

I'll try it.....I'm so afraid of causing a big stink in the middle of the night and waking everyone up, so I'm sure I'm not helping things by being so quick to respond with the boob.

luangwa's picture
Joined: 06/29/07
Posts: 8898

You are so right. But I did the same thing, I was very quick to respond to ABs, in the name of not waking Jax. I now run a cool mist humidifier in both rooms as white noise. Those suckers are loud and it totally drowns out all other noises. Now Jax doesn't get disturbed at all, and neither does Abs when Jax wakes up screaming with a night terror.

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

is he on solids??
if so........to help get him to take the paci......dunk the paci in his fave for a couple of times.....and if he starts to suck on it.......DONT take it out........just keep doing that........even if it is for an hour.........just let him have it......and when he spits it out.......dunk it again......if food doesn't work.......try a little sugar......he doesn't have teeth to rot out yet(does he??? if he has teeth......maybe sugar isn't the best..;) from the dental hygienist......) but as a means of desperation, even sugar isn't gonna kill him or rot his teeth with a couple of nipples full!!!!!!!!!!!
and i think i would be real demanding at night.....when i wanted sarah and max to night wean.......i used to rock them facing out......and let them cry themselves to sleep on me......but i refused to nurse em.....it was hard, and ya, i lost a lot of sleep for a couple of nights.....but the outcome worked and we had a much happier household........and i night weaned sarah and max at 5months.......(ya, ya, ya,......i was young and not as educated........i worked and wanted sleep......and it worked!!!! LOL!!!) i say.......make a plan..........and write it down.........and put it where you will see it constantly.........cuz you need training and so does jay........and if you cave, than so will he.........you need to be strong, mentally prepare yourself for even less sleep than your already getting, and once you initiate...........DON"T TURN BACK........it won't be easy........buy earplugs.........as long as you know that boy is fed, clean, and just completely exhausted.......it's ok to let him cry.........start with small goals .........like not taking him out of the crib before midnight..........let him cry and learn to self sooth........jack doesn't take a paci, and doesn't suck his fingers........but i put a little cat facecloth(silly little hand puppet type thing) and he freaking loves to chew on it........it calms him and helps him put himself to sleep.......who'd a thunk???????????
but write out a plan......and get your hubby on board........and stick to it......it will work..........know what you can handle and make the plan around it.........if that means you are going to be sitting by his crib all night long just touching him....and shushing him.....so be it.....(i did this with jack in the beginning......and then i realized it was taking him longer to fall asleep with me in the room...so i left....and you know what.......he was fine!!!!!!!!!! and didn't want me touching him when he was trying to sleep).............

sorry for the novel.......i'll keep thinking for ya!!!!!!!

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

I have an air purifier in JHs room and a humidifier in my room....can't live without the noise! Unfortunately, we live in a pretty small house and the rooms share a wall so there's no easy way to truly muffle the sound. JH is a pretty sound sleeper though, I just worry about waking him up.

Just asked DH about sleeping with Jay tonight and giving him a bottle....he doesn't really feel good about it....thinks he sleeps too deeply, might roll onto the baby, etc....and in all honesty, I have my doubts too. He's never been able to sooth either baby....ever.

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

Those are great ideas Colleen. So you suggest the holding him facing out crying thing or putting him in the crib and sitting next to him while he cries? I'm all for a plan, writing it down, and sticking with it, I just never knew what to try. Can you just come over and show me what to do please???

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

i'd love to sweetie, i can be there in about 10 hours......ya got enough room for 6??? LOL.....i'll leave dh home to tend to the animals!!!!!! he'd be no help anyways......he'll just sleep through the commotion!! ROFL!!!!!!

Jumarse's picture
Joined: 02/27/07
Posts: 5219

What about letting him sleep on his belly? I know that's a touchy subject, but the only thing that has worked for both my kids. :bigarmhug:

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

ya.......i used to rock sarah and max facing them away from me.....sometimes we were in the chair for A.LONG.TIME but they got the picture that ......momma wasn't giving in......after the 3rd or 4th night of waking and wanting and not getting......they usually catch on, and stop waking, or at least shorten the process........even the shorter process is a step in the right direction.......this may take a couple of weeks.......if jay is super stubborn......be prepared girl......but you can't give in.......you can't cave........i would sit there and cry.......cuz i had to be to work in a couple hours and i was like how the f am i going to get this kid to sleep and have time to shower and get 2 kids ready for daycare......it was awful.......but i never gave in....

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
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"Jumarse" wrote:

What about letting him sleep on his belly? I know that's a touchy subject, but the only thing that has worked for both my kids. :bigarmhug:

same here........worked for max, abby and jack.......
well of course it's biting me in the a$$ with my non rolling little stinker.......LOL!!!!!!!!!

luangwa's picture
Joined: 06/29/07
Posts: 8898

"Jennilynnjeff" wrote:

I have an air purifier in JHs room and a humidifier in my room....can't live without the noise! Unfortunately, we live in a pretty small house and the rooms share a wall so there's no easy way to truly muffle the sound. JH is a pretty sound sleeper though, I just worry about waking him up.

Just asked DH about sleeping with Jay tonight and giving him a bottle....he doesn't really feel good about it....thinks he sleeps too deeply, might roll onto the baby, etc....and in all honesty, I have my doubts too. He's never been able to sooth either baby....ever.

Jax and Abs rooms share a wall, if I'm running the humidifier in Jax room and the door is closed, I can't hear Abigail screaming from her room, nor DH banging the dishes around unloading the dishwasher. We have wood floors and the noise in our house echos all over the place. I guess the cool mist ones I have are just really reallt loud. LOL

I really think Colleen's idea of writing out a plan and sticking to it, is a very good idea. It helps to be able to recall why you are doing this.

Good luck. I'm in the same position right now. I just need to find the balls to carry out a little sleep training with Abs.

Joined: 06/29/08
Posts: 1096

Sounds a lot like Miles, too.

I read all the sleep books and nothing seemed to help. Finally, I started making DH take ONE wake-up at night. It started at one and then we went to more, gradually.

And another thing that finally helped us was that I stopped even trying to put Miles in the crib. The first night I let him sleep in our bed from bedtime (instead of putting him in the crib and then moving him when he woke up) was the first time he slept through the night. Ever. He was 18 months old.

It sounds like you REALLY need some time. Can DH take care of them for a day while you sleep the day away. Things like this - I think if you just got one good long stretch of sleep you'd feel so much better.

Have you taken him to the doc? To rule out stuff like reflux or anything (I know it's doubtful, and horrible to hope that there is actually something wrong, but...).

Is there anything he DOES like? I mean, does he sleep in a swing, car? If there is, maybe we can brainstorm something that might help at night.

:bigarmhug:

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"Jumarse" wrote:

What about letting him sleep on his belly? I know that's a touchy subject, but the only thing that has worked for both my kids. :bigarmhug:

Tried the belly months ago....no good...hates it.

"msmama" wrote:

Sounds a lot like Miles, too.

I read all the sleep books and nothing seemed to help. Finally, I started making DH take ONE wake-up at night. It started at one and then we went to more, gradually.

And another thing that finally helped us was that I stopped even trying to put Miles in the crib. The first night I let him sleep in our bed from bedtime (instead of putting him in the crib and then moving him when he woke up) was the first time he slept through the night. Ever. He was 18 months old.

It sounds like you REALLY need some time. Can DH take care of them for a day while you sleep the day away. Things like this - I think if you just got one good long stretch of sleep you'd feel so much better.

Have you taken him to the doc? To rule out stuff like reflux or anything (I know it's doubtful, and horrible to hope that there is actually something wrong, but...).

Is there anything he DOES like? I mean, does he sleep in a swing, car? If there is, maybe we can brainstorm something that might help at night.

:bigarmhug:

I did think it was reflux back in the early days and we tried a couple different meds, but nothing made a difference. I tried cutting all dairy for a while....no difference. That's kinda when we started totally co-sleeping cuz it was the only way I could get any rest at all. He'll sleep in the swing for some naps if I've nursed him to sleep 1st, but won't do it at night; wakes up screaming within 20 mins... For a while there he screamed non-stop in the carseat, but a few weeks ago started to lighten up a bit and would fall asleep. Today we had to do some errands with him and he screamed the entire 3 hours we were out. WTH? I just don't know.

We did move the crib into my room though. Tonight will be interesting as far as JH is concerned....he seemed to sorta understand and give his permission to pass the crib on the Jay, but we'll see how he feels at bedtime. Of course I doubt Jay will se more than 30 mins of the crib either....

Allie01979's picture
Joined: 10/10/07
Posts: 4706

Aidan wouldn't take any paci and i was at my whits end... until we went to Em's one afternoon and he found this

I don't think you can buy them in stores, at least not here in Canada, I had to order them off Ebay, I think Amaon has them too. They're made for babies who won't accept a paci and for nursing babies, Aidan was about Jay's age when he accepted that one, but it has to be latex and it has to be this brand, not silicone (as long as he doesn't have a latex allergy that is)

As for the co-sleeping I don't know, I never co-slept with Aidan. I really hope you can find something that works for you mama, I feel aweful for you, I know how little sleep can mess with your moods, you need a good nights sleep. :bighug:

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"Allie01979" wrote:

Aidan wouldn't take any paci and i was at my whits end... until we went to Em's one afternoon and he found this

I don't think you can buy them in stores, at least not here in Canada, I had to order them off Ebay, I think Amaon has them too. They're made for babies who won't accept a paci and for nursing babies, Aidan was about Jay's age when he accepted that one, but it has to be latex and it has to be this brand, not silicone (as long as he doesn't have a latex allergy that is)

As for the co-sleeping I don't know, I never co-slept with Aidan. I really hope you can find something that works for you mama, I feel aweful for you, I know how little sleep can mess with your moods, you need a good nights sleep. :bighug:

Thanks Allie...I'll see if I can find one....

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

He's been crying for about 30 minutes and now it's quiet....I've been crying for about 25.

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

(((((((((((((HUGS ))))))))))))))))))))))))
is he in the crib??? i think only 30 mins of crying
for the first time .......really isn't all that bad......
jack sometimes fusses for 20 minutes before his naps........
and sometimes it's big angry, get me out of here cries....
things i do to keep my sanity
1...turn down the monitor....if it's not blaring his cries, it is much easier on me
2........i go and fold laundry or clean the kitchen.......both always need to get done
and i can be further away from the stinkin monitor!!!!!LOL!!!!!!!!!
i'm sending you all the positive vibes and all kinds of good
sleep vibes for you and jay!!!!!!!!!!!

StateChick's picture
Joined: 03/22/07
Posts: 3629

How are ya?! Hope he went fast to sleep for you and gives you a really long stretch. :bighug:

Joined: 06/09/06
Posts: 3264

"luangwa" wrote:

Jenn, :bighug: Momma!!!!!!! I second the pacifier. I'd buy one of each brand. And I'd be more stubborn about getting him to take it then he is about rejecting them.

Also, I'd tell DH if he didn't want to be a single dad then he has to help break this cycle. It would be a little easier if DH learned how to pacify him and it would be of great benefit if Jay would accept someone else pacifying him.

Jordan went through this with Fi. Maybe she'll see this and stop in. She's been hanging out on the May 10 board, though.

Totally agree with this, and my pedi said something similar - Dad really needs to do the soothing, because if they see you, they'll expect boob and take SO much longer to calm down. Even if he's never done it before, he'll figure it out... men can be resourceful if they want to be. Smile

"Jennilynnjeff" wrote:

I'll try it.....I'm so afraid of causing a big stink in the middle of the night and waking everyone up, so I'm sure I'm not helping things by being so quick to respond with the boob.

Oh my gosh, I could have typed this word for word. I'm worried that I'm creating a rotten sleeper with Brian because I've had all three crying in the middle of the night and it SUCKS. BUT, I will say that Noelle is really getting good at sleeping through Micah's crying (they're sharing a room) and vice versa. They do learn to sleep through each other's crying, I think...

I wish I had actual advice for you. Sad :bigarmhug:

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

Well, it was more like an hour of crying last night....but he did fall asleep at about 9p. I just zoned out on the couch and fell asleep for a while myself. By 11 he was crying again, by I never heard him and DH picked him up and rocked him until he fell back asleep. I woke at 11 and was shocked and amazed that DH was holding a sleeping baby...so what did I do??? I took him and went to bed with him where he woke right up and demanded boob. I gave it to him and that was our night.....

At least he slep in the crib for a while. I'll try again tonight.

Jumarse's picture
Joined: 02/27/07
Posts: 5219

Baby steps, Jennifer, baby steps. :bigarmhug:

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
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woooohooooooooooo...........2 hours in the crib.........that is awesome!!!!!!!!!!

mist1006's picture
Joined: 01/10/07
Posts: 1018

Definitely a good start!

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"Jennilynnjeff" wrote:

Well, it was more like an hour of crying last night....but he did fall asleep at about 9p. I just zoned out on the couch and fell asleep for a while myself. By 11 he was crying again, by I never heard him and DH picked him up and rocked him until he fell back asleep. I woke at 11 and was shocked and amazed that DH was holding a sleeping baby...so what did I do??? I took him and went to bed with him where he woke right up and demanded boob. I gave it to him and that was our night.....

At least he slep in the crib for a while. I'll try again tonight.

This is in reference to Jay...NOT DH! ROFL I crack myself up!

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

"Jennilynnjeff" wrote:

This is in reference to Jay...NOT DH! ROFL I crack myself up!

:bleh::ROFL: i'm glad you can still crack yourself up!!!!!!!!!! i hope today is a better day for ya....:cool:

luangwa's picture
Joined: 06/29/07
Posts: 8898

"Jennilynnjeff" wrote:

Well, it was more like an hour of crying last night....but he did fall asleep at about 9p. I just zoned out on the couch and fell asleep for a while myself. By 11 he was crying again, by I never heard him and DH picked him up and rocked him until he fell back asleep. I woke at 11 and was shocked and amazed that DH was holding a sleeping baby...so what did I do??? I took him and went to bed with him where he woke right up and demanded boob. I gave it to him and that was our night.....

At least he slep in the crib for a while. I'll try again tonight.

This sounds like a perfect first step. It just has to get better from here, right?
I just have to ask, was it guilt that made you take a sleeping baby from your hubby? Or was there just no way he was going to let anyone put him back in the crib?

Allie01979's picture
Joined: 10/10/07
Posts: 4706

that's a great start Jenn. I may need to follow your advice later, William will only sleep his first stretch in his bassinet and then it's in our bed and on the boob. I'm creating a monster I'm sure, but I'm sooo exhausted so I do feel your pain.

When Aidan was 8 months old, I had to do a kinder ferber method with him, he was waking every 45 minutes to nurse, he never slept with us, but I was constantly up nursing him. I started out with letting him cry for about 5 mins at a time and then going in and rubbing his back, offering his paci, then I'd go 10 minutes then 20 etc. the first night I cried all night, the second night he'd only cry for a few minutes, by the 3rd night, I didn't even make it to his room before he fell back to sleep, on night 4 he STTN for the second time EVER since he was a month old. I really hope you can do something like that. I'm glad DH stepped up and helped you, A happy wife has a happy husband lol.

Jennilynnjeff's picture
Joined: 06/11/07
Posts: 314

"luangwa" wrote:

This sounds like a perfect first step. It just has to get better from here, right?
I just have to ask, was it guilt that made you take a sleeping baby from your hubby? Or was there just no way he was going to let anyone put him back in the crib?

I sure hoped so...but if last night was any indication, it's gonna get worse. As far as taking a sleeping baby from my DHs arms just to get in bed with him and nurse again...I have no idea....I just wasn't thinking...lost that ability a while ago. I can't believe I did that.....

So last night was awful again. Nursed Jay to sleep and when I moved him to the crib, he instantly opened his eyes and started crying. I just left the room. He cried for more than an hour last night, with me checking on him 3 times within that hour. I think that only made things worse though. Once he was asleep, he only stayed that way about an hour and a half. As soon as he woke, I just couldn't take it anymore so I got him and got in bed with him...ahhhhh, sweet relief for both of us. What am I doing??? If I only knew what I was supposed to do, I could do it. I just don't know for sure. Listening to my child scream for me is shear torture...just cut my arm off while we're at it...couldn't hurt any more.

Jumarse's picture
Joined: 02/27/07
Posts: 5219

But see, I think you ARE doing this right...it's not going to happen immediately or overnight, and I can see it getting worse before it gets better (sorry!!). This is all new to him, and it's going to take him time to adjust, with probably lots of crying. You just have to decide how you want to try and comfort him and when you decide it's enough for the night...and you are doing that now. Nothing else you can do....he'll get it, I think the most important thing is you are trying. It's going to be really hard, but I think if you just continue to stick with it, for however long he'll stay in the crib at night, it'll eventually start to be longer periods. And it's not like you have to say 20 minutes tonight, etc....just play it by his reactions, some nights may be more or less. NOW, that said, I'm all for fussing it out and even allowing a little crying at Jay's age...I know everyone is different.

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

((((((HUGS JENNIFER))))))).......ugh.........
ok......you need to figure out what you want......if it is to cosleep......that is perfectly fine......and if it's just cosleeping and slowly adjusting jay to sleep next to you without your boob in his mouth......then that is what the goal should be..... and even that is going to take jay a while to get used to.......but again.....make alist of what you and dh want to acheive, and you both need to get on board.......it may just involve slowly, (or for me.....if i break jacks latch quickly and he does better) and getting 20 minutes of sleep without jay attached..and when he wakes, just try shushing him or snuggling him , maybe a paci, or if all else fails, nurse him again, until he is asleep and break the latch again.......and see if he sleeps 30 minutes...
but it's ok to want to cosleep........i bring jack in everysingle morning.....i love it...and so does he.......but i have my own "rules"........and i really try to stick to them.......and it has taken me MONTHS to get to this point.........and is it perfect, and do i follow my own rules everynight.........NOPE>.........always an exception.....so if i were you.......i would start writing down goals, or things you'd like to see different in the next 3 months......not the next 3 days. ((((((HUGS))))))
i know listening to jack scream for an hour would be excruciating.....i'd have to leave the house....LOL.....seriously......i'd have to go walk and cry if jack was screaming for an hour......i'm all for fussing.......and jack sometimes "escalates", but it is usually his last burst of energy, and i can tell because he escalates, and then quickly turns into a hum, and then he falls to sleep.........
..... good luck girl.........but i think figuring out what it is YOU want is where you need to begin.....we're here for ya!!!!!!! ((((((HUGS)))))))

shefrn1's picture
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:bighug:

StateChick's picture
Joined: 03/22/07
Posts: 3629

Just wondering how it went last night!

I don't co-sleep all the time because Wade would just chew on my boob all night (and because dh won't let me and I don't truly want to anyway....), but when he IS in the bed with me, I nurse him good and then turn my back to him.

My sister also does this with her little boy. This relieves the babe of the notion that the boob should be in their mouth simply because it is there. Wink

I am glad to see your dh stepped up a little, because I think it is bull hockey when dh tells me he can't make the baby be quiet - yeah, it is because you're.not.trying!!!! I'm not talking about the middle of the night...just general, middle of the day holding the baby and won't even try to soothe him.

Finally, don't completely rule out the fact that Jay may have a little reflux/stomach issue going on. Ella was a lot like this, but not only was she uncomfortable in the bed, she was also uncomfortable in my arms, she comfort nursed like crazy (I think she thought eating would make her tummy feel better), and then she would finally pass out about 6am and give me about 3 good hours. But she showed no outward signs of reflux or anything. But I am extra paranoid about stuff like that now, so take it with a grain of salt!! How long did he stick with each med? Also, I know you eliminated dairy to no avail, but is there a possibility that it is something else that is bothering him? If his poops are normal I would say your diet is probably fine...just thinking out loud!