help MOH speech---OT and a story to go with

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kristimcw's picture
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help MOH speech---OT and a story to go with

so two days ago my sis tells me I have to give a speech at the reception. To me this falls on a needed to know a few weeks ago thing since the wedding is saturday.

backstory as to why I am having trouble.

I moved out of the house when she was 7/8 and moved back one summer for college and all I heard from both my sisters was how much they hated me and they wished I had never moved back. So since that summer I never moved back home. We arent really close so I was really shocked when she wanted me to be her Matron of Honor and not one of her closer friends...kwim?

I go visit my mom and my sister always just really grates on my nerves.......it is always about her and mom always watches her son.....

I emailed her the other day to ask when we needed to be there....she told me Friday at six. Well I called her back to ask her a question or two a few days later and told her MIL wants us to go shopping that morning for DH for the cruise and she was in a rude yelling voice
Her:you have got to be freaking kidding me, you have to got to be freaking kidding me.....you are going shopping on the day of the wedding"
Me: you told me I dont have to be there by 6, remember I asked and that is what you told me and the wedding is saturday not friday....
her: well mom and I talked last night and just nevermind, never mind we have enough people to to help set up just nevermind you just go shopping.
Me: I dont have to be there by 6.....you told me that a few days ago
Her: mom and I talked last night and need help to set up...just never mind we can do it without you as long as you are her by 6 on friday we should have enough people to set up anyway...

Where was the email or call or even text asking if I can get there earlier to help set up? Where was the asking me to help set up? I know I am Matron of Honor and all, but she is telling people how she has no help, how she is doing this all by herself. She did not ask mom for help, she really didnt ask me to be marton of honor either, just expected it.......

My mom says I cannot say anything like..... "about d@mn time you moved out of moms house" or anything else on that order....

The only reason I am doing the MOH duties is because of mom......if my sis doesnt change her brizelilla ways after the wedding we probably wont speak much after. Because trust me there is more stories of her behavior and treatment of mom that has pretty much pissed me off beyond repair.

any advice on the speech? online speeches I find are all sappy and mushy and well, that is not really our relationship.

and I HATE PUBLIC SPEAKING!!!!!! I get nervous and sweaty and my heart beats faster and faster....

luangwa's picture
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:eek: I have no idea, but I'm so sorry for you.

Maybe try googling an outline or format instead of a whole speech, like what to include etc?????

ETA: I found a site that might help. http://www.bridesmaid101.com/maid_of_honor_speech.html

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Ooo that's rough. I'd just also look up other speeches online and take stuff from that. If you guys are having a rough time, you could still fake a nice little speech...good luck!!!

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Thanks Mel. If I could keep the mush and gush out of it.

Maybe just welcome everyone
Say how good my sister looks.
Welcome my BIL to the family.

I am an excellent BSer usually when I have more time to prepare and not packing getting ready to leave in a few days....

I just wasnt there when she was growing up kwim? I moved off, went to college, got married, then they moved away and then I moved further away so no big stories that I could think of.

and it doesnt help that I dont know hardly anything about my new BIL except he is in the AF and likes star wars.....

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oh and it used to be the best man who gave the speech,

it is a new thing I guess.

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Today on your wedding day ______ I want to raise my glass to you and your new husband. I want you to know that I am so happy for you and ____. May today’s happiness last forever. I wish you the best! To the bride and groom.

edited this from something I found online...hehe....short sweet easy to remember and then just add a bit at the beginning

LOL.

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sorry I am rambling. I am already nervous and there is not a big audience yet......nerves are awful!!!

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man..........good luck with the speech.......YIKES!!!!!!!!

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"kristimcw" wrote:

Today on your wedding day ______ I want to raise my glass to you and your new husband. I want you to know that I am so happy for you and ____. May today’s happiness last forever. I wish you the best! To the bride and groom.

edited this from something I found online...hehe....short sweet easy to remember and then just add a bit at the beginning

LOL.

sounds good to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I like what you came up with! It is short sweet, to the point, and not fake (given your relationship with her).

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I'm sorry for you, you always have enough stress IMO, you don't need this.

At my wedding, the best man gave a toast to the groom and the MOH gave a toast to the bride. That was all it really was. And my MOH had had a few drinks and started crying part way through, lol. :rolleyes:

I think the short and sweet best wishes approach is your best bet. Chances are she'll complain anyway. :rolleyes:

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Just wanted to add, the brothers of the groom gave speeches too, as well as my dad...I'm sure you won't be the only one, so be kind to the audience and keep it short, lol! You can always open the floor to impromptu soliloquies - I had a couple of older folks stand up and toast their spouses, it was sweet.

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"MaxiMamma" wrote:

I'm sorry for you, you always have enough stress IMO, you don't need this.

At my wedding, the best man gave a toast to the groom and the MOH gave a toast to the bride. That was all it really was. And my MOH had had a few drinks and started crying part way through, lol. :rolleyes:

I think the short and sweet best wishes approach is your best bet. Chances are she'll complain anyway. :rolleyes:

This. So don't beat yourself up too much! Keep it short and sweet.

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Wow Kristi, that's tough! I like the one you came up with, nice and short! Good luck!

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"MaxiMamma" wrote:

I'm sorry for you, you always have enough stress IMO, you don't need this.

At my wedding, the best man gave a toast to the groom and the MOH gave a toast to the bride. That was all it really was. And my MOH had had a few drinks and started crying part way through, lol. :rolleyes:

I think the short and sweet best wishes approach is your best bet. Chances are she'll complain anyway. :rolleyes:

Probably so.

Thanks for all your help. I have found some other things to follow online. I have to take the boys shirts to the dry cleaners today, so when I am done writing it I will type it up here..

Aye!!!

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Good luck Kristi.
I like what you have so far - nice and short.
I'm like you, hate public speaking...so I can imagine how you feel.

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I would do a joke like speech, something that you can almost Roast her with LOL, it'll be true but you can say you were kidding :razz:

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"Allie01979" wrote:

I would do a joke like speech, something that you can almost Roast her with LOL, it'll be true but you can say you were kidding :razz:

my mom would kill me!!

If it werent for the fact that my BIL tried to date her about a year ago I could joke that it was nice to have someone in the family whose name is not Jason......My hubby's name is Jason Wade and my BILs name is Jason Wayne........my new BIL is Alex.....

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Well, do you have the speech done? I'm anxiously awaiting it.

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"luangwa" wrote:

Well, do you have the speech done? I'm anxiously awaiting it.

heck no!!!

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This is what I have so far

"Family and Friends
Thank you for coming today to celebrate in T and A's wedding day. As T's older sister I am honored she asked me to be a part of her special day.

T you look absolutely gorgeous and everything today was so beautiful.....

Raise your glass with me as we welcome A to our family and wish them a lifetime of happy memories together (or may your happiness today last forever.)...( I havent decided)

To Mr. and Mrs. E"

but then I sit down and thing something else sounds better.......

I used to be so good at BSing and this is not coming so easily

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"kristimcw" wrote:

This is what I have so far

"Family and Friends
Thank you for coming today to celebrate in T and A's wedding day. As T's older sister I am honored she asked me to be a part of her special day.

T you look absolutely gorgeous and everything today was so beautiful.....

Raise your glass with me as we welcome A to our family and wish them a lifetime of happy memories together (or may your happiness today last forever.)...( I havent decided)

To Mr. and Mrs. E"

but then I sit down and thing something else sounds better.......

I used to be so good at BSing and this is not coming so easily

No to the bolded. I like the first line better.

Kristi, I really, really, really think this is perfect. Like Karina said, all of the guests will appreciate that it is short because there will be other toasts/speeches from other people and it gets so boring and redundant.

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Thank you. I have really been stressing.

some sights online said to be about 750 words....memorized...not happening.....

They also say not to use index cards, but I am so using them !!!

It is easy, but my mind is mush, I might just need a little reminder....

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I think it's perfect too! And I like the first line better too.