BTDT potty training

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Lolkje's picture
Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 08/24/09
Posts: 90
BTDT potty training

We signed DD up for 3s preschool at the school where we teach in the fall. She needs to be potty trained. And with baby #2 due soon, we don't want two in diapers for long.

I tried EC with DD when she was really little, and had some success, but she forgot all about it when I went back to work. DH picked up a potty for her a month ago. I finally heard her pee in it last week when I stepped out of the bathroom for a moment. Then I think I screwed up. I was so excited, and rushed back into the bathroom so quickly, that I'm afraid I freaked her out. She started crying. Now she'll just sit on the potty for up to a half hour as long as she's being entertained, but doesn't want to pee, even when she's been dry for hours and it's obvious her bladder is getting uncomfortable. She will pretend to pee, but not actually pee. As soon as she says she wants to go play and we start putting her diaper back on, she asks to sit on the potty again. It's baffling.

Should we keep up with our potty routine and just wait for her to have another breakthrough? Or should we give it a rest? With another month of teaching middle school to go before I can take maternity leave, my patience is fraying. I can't sleep tonight because work and potty training are stressing me out.

Dixiemom1st's picture
Last seen: 3 years 8 months ago
Joined: 09/07/07
Posts: 620

That was us in January. We tried potty training but she was not getting it and I was frustrated. So we stopped and I said we would get back to it later. Then just last Monday she had to go #2 and I knew it so I put her on the potty and she went. Then I put her in underwear and she has been doing great ever since. She tells us at home but not yet when we go out. So we are working on that. It jut clicked for her (DS never had a click like that and it took alot longer).

It is not good for you both to be frustrated, especially if you are losing sleep, so my advice would be to give it a break for the moment and maybe try back in a few weeks or after the baby is born. You have lots of time before September, DS needs to be potty trained for nursery school as well and he did not get it till August.

Good luck potty training can be frustrating. I hope it clicks for her soon.

MrsRiggert's picture
Last seen: 3 years 8 months ago
Joined: 11/21/07
Posts: 2195

I FOUGHT DD for over a year and a half (off and on) with potty training. All because when she was 14 months old she said she wanted to go potty and for over a week straight would go pee in the toilet. Then on Thanksgiving she got the stomach flu and threw up after she pottied...she was DONE from that point on. We tried candy, we tried, letting be naked and putting her on the potty every 20 minutes, we tried a potty party, you name it, I tried it but NOTHING worked.

Then one day...about 2 weeks after her 3rd birthday...Lexi said "I have to go potty" and she sat down on the toilet and went potty! From that moment on she always went pee in the toilet. Pooping took a little longer (about 2 more weeks) but once she decided to do it she's been doing it ever since.

SOOO...I highy suggest that if you're frustrated you give her the time she needs. She'll let you know when she's ready. (Which I know is much easier said than done because I was in the same boat not too long ago)

KET_2010's picture
Last seen: 2 years 6 months ago
Joined: 08/13/11
Posts: 1737

DD1 wasn't potty trained until she was 3 and even then she still had little accidents until she was probably 4 1/2. That was because she would hold it so long and didn't want to stop doing what she was doing to go. She would go just a little in her pants, then not tell me, and I would smell it on her. It was bad, but a lot of kids are like that.

With DD2 she has shown some interest in wanting to use her potty but she will just sit there for about 20 minutes because she knows just showing us she's trying makes us happy. She has yet to go in it, and I'm hoping once she does go in it then she will start always going in it, but who knows!

If you're getting frustrated I would give it a rest just for a little, even if it's just a week or two. Then go back to it and see if she is willing to try again.

Last seen: 3 years 1 month ago
Joined: 08/06/11
Posts: 360

I have potty trained four kids and each is different. Some get potty training quickly, and some take a bit longer. In our house when a little one shows that they are able to feel their body needs to pee and make it to the potty, which your daughter has done, we just go with only pants in the house (no underwear because it is more layers to pull down and get back up again). It can be a bit messy for a day or two, but with all the kids I've trained, by the end of the second day most of the pee and poop is in the potty!! For going out, I judge where they are at, how much reminding they need, and put on a diaper until I think we are closer to no accidents... usually just another couple of weeks. That way no one gets discouraged by accidents in public because I can't find a bathroom fast enough!

From my experience there are stages of potty training - 1st - not ready, 2nd - is able to control the muscles and pee/poop when asked but always needs to be reminded to go sit on the potty, 3rd - knows they have to pee and initiates a trip to the potty, 4th - realizes they don't have to run to the potty as soon as they feel they have to pee (this is when people say the kids have a regression, but I think it is a learning step that they are just holding it longer because they realize they can!!), and 5th - completely potty trained!!! (except for the occassional accident when too wrapped up in an activity).

Good luck with the training,


Last seen: 2 years 10 months ago
Joined: 06/03/07
Posts: 623

I agree with others who've said to give both you a break for a bit, and try again when you think she's ready. While it'd be great if she were PT'ed by the time #2 gets here, if it doesn't happen, well that's ok (though I totally understand why you want that, I'd want it too for sure). And, you still have plenty of time for the full-time 3s class, so don't let that stress you out! Good luck.

jolly11sd's picture
Last seen: 3 years 6 months ago
Joined: 02/02/05
Posts: 3327

I'd also take a break for now. If you and her are both feeling frustrated then no potty training will be happening because of the underlying tension. You can always start up again in a few weeks if she is showing interest or wait until after your LO arrives to give it another go. When I trained my 1st I made sure that it was during a time when I was on break from teaching for a while (summer) so that I would be home with him to work on it for a good amount of time. I agree that you still have loads of time until the next school year begins to get her all set with the potty. For now just keep the new little potty out so that she can play with it or sit at it on her terms without any pressure to use it.

Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 01/16/07
Posts: 951

if she is stressed then I'd take a break but otherwise I wouldn't.....going back is only going to get confusing.
All kids are different and all home situations are different but this is what I did with ds just after his 2nd bday. I did this on a week I was off from work so it was easier. I knew a movie that he'd be occupied with, I sat him on the potty and kept filling up his drink with a yummy drink that I knew he'd down. He had no choice but to pee while the movie was on. I celebrated his pee and I gave him smarites. We did naked time and kept the potty easy access and encouraged pee's often and gave smarties. He was pee trained in 2 days and poo trained within a week. Smartie treats didn't last that long before he stopped asking


PsycheGal's picture
Last seen: 2 years 10 months ago
Joined: 12/07/08
Posts: 768

I'm not sure what advice to give other than to not make a huge deal out of the potty thing. Both my girls were trained ASAP and well before their 2nd birthdays. My first was faster, she was using the potty to pee only by age 1 and consistently for both pee and poop by 15 months (she walked at 9 months though). We had three potties, one in the bathroom, one in the bedroom and one in the living room (all the same kind) so baby didn't have to make a run for it since they can't really hold it that early. I pretty much dragged that thing around w/me and it only took a few days to get them going. Also, some kids get freaked if you over-cheer! LOL! My 2nd DID NOT like after potty cheering, so we just told her softly how she was such a big girl like her sister.

My youngest did fear the big toilet though LOL! She would NOT use a big toilet until after her 2nd birthday and I only got her to do it because I made her go out and choose whatever seat/adjusting thing she wanted (nothing like peeing on a princess!).

mommyof1.5's picture
Last seen: 3 years 10 months ago
Joined: 08/06/07
Posts: 897

I think it totally depends on your child, how receptive, how "ready" they are.. My 1st DD was 19 months when her sister was born. She had shown a great interest in the potty chair that we had set up for her, around 17 months. As soon as her sister was born, she regressed & wasn't interested AT ALL. We weren't pushing it, but just making it available. Personally, I got the feeling that going from only child to 2nd child was enough of a difference that probably any child who hasn't made the transition will regress for a bit, while getting adjusted to things. It's so hard to gauge though..