Mommy advice?

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krazykat's picture
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Mommy advice?

Ok, for BTDT and first timers...

BTDT mamas, any advice to share for those who are going through pregnancy and childbirth for the first time?

And first time mamas, what do you think is the best piece of advice you have been given?

I'll go first...
-Consider taking an in depth childbirth series like Bradley, Lamaze, Hypnobabies, or whatever suits you best. The more knowledge you have, the more likely you are to have the birth that you desire.
-Consider a doula. Doulas do not replace your partner! They are there to support you both and to help you have a positive experience.
-Consider chiropractic care during pregnancy. I was a total non-believer until I discovered that going to the chiropractor can make sciatic pain disappear Biggrin If your bodily structure is aligned properly, it can make your pregnancy and labor a much better experience.

Next!!

Angelshere's picture
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drink lots of water!!! It can help with cramping, it gives you the extra energy you need sometimes. That was like the best thing given to me. Oh and be patient hahahah ya like that happens Blum 3

jolly11sd's picture
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"krazykat" wrote:

-Consider taking an in depth childbirth series like Bradley, Lamaze, Hypnobabies, or whatever suits you best. The more knowledge you have, the more likely you are to have the birth that you desire.

Totally this! I thought you could just walk into birth and walk out with exactly the experience you wanted. Turns out that reading up and preparing metally and physicallly is really important.

-Stand up for things that you want and believe in during pregnancy and birth. So many people (friends, family, docs, ect.) will try to tell you their opions or get you to believe your choices may not be the best. But really it is your pregnancy and your birth and you will be the one going through it and not them.

MrsRiggert's picture
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"jolly11sd" wrote:

-Stand up for things that you want and believe in during pregnancy and birth. So many people (friends, family, docs, ect.) will try to tell you their opions or get you to believe your choices may not be the best. But really it is your pregnancy and your birth and you will be the one going through it and not them.

I couldn't agree more with this one!!! With DD I did what the doc told me and followed along like a good little mommy 100% of the time. And when he said "Well, it looks like she's going to be a big baby. I think we should induce early so she's not late" I was compliant. I HATED EVERY MOMENT OF THAT BIRTH UNTIL SHE WAS IN MY ARMS!!!

With DS I hired a Doula, read up on Bradly, Lamaze, and even Orgasmic Childbirth. I was SOOO prepared for DS to be born! Then he was late, at 41 weeks the doc scheduled an induction for the following week on a Wednesday. Saturday afternoon I evicted DS on my own because I was NOT going through another induction.

Sorry I went off there a little bit. In conclusion here's my advice. Read up on as many techniques as possible, hire a doula, and do things YOUR way...don't let anyone tell you how to be pregnant.

AnnaRO's picture
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Be open-minded. Don't assume that just because you make a birth plan that things will always go that way. Keep an open mind and stay flexible to what is best for you and the baby.

Educate yourself!! This is HUGE! And not just about what you want, but about your hospital/birth center policies and proceedures. If you plan to breastfeed, find out if they routinely give formula to the babies in the nursery. This happened to a friend of mine who ended up with a cesarean and it took them about 4 hours to bring her the baby, and they fed him formula in the nursery before bringing him to her as per their policy. Get all the information you can about what you want and what the policies and proceedures are for where you will give birth.

If you have certain ideas about who you want at the hospital with you during delivery, make it clear well in advance! Your family may be different, but many times families can get defensive and offended if they feel like they should be allowed in the room.

KET_2010's picture
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This is just a suggestion, not advice. When you got into the hospital in labor you may want to advise your family/friends/loved ones, that they may not want to wait in the waiting area until it's about time to push.

Reason for this: my sister went into labor in the early afternoon or something (maybe even that morning), and then didn't have her daughter until real late at night. Well she and her husband wanted family in the waiting area during labor. Well, because we were all waiting (although I didn't get there until between 8 and 9) we all got restless and of course tensions rose between families (more so because my sister's FIL tried to control things and pretty much thought he should be right outside the hospital room or inside the room with my sister) and everyone got annoyed with each other (add in the MIL and FIL who were divorced and on BAD terms!).

Anyway, by the time my niece was born, it was more a relief that the families could be separated instead of a really joyous occasion. (Don't get me wrong, I was excited she was born, and even visited them during my lunch break the next day, it was just miserable listening to her FIL going on and on about how "great" he was.)

Point is, if you want people in the waiting room, you may want to hold off until it's time to push or getting close to that time. With my first I was admitted late at night and had her the next morning (after about 10 minutes of pushing I had her, LUCKY!) and then my younger one, I went in in the early afternoon and was induced because my water was leaking, and had her that night (after about 15 minutes of pushing...again LUCKY!) The first time my parents were in the waiting room because I told them it was soon, my daughter's father's mom came after she was born (his dad came later to yell at me...nice guy huh?!) With my other daughter, no one was in the waiting area haha. My parents had my older daughter and since it was late (10 pm) we didn't want to drag her up to the hospital when she was tired. His family didn't bother coming up to see her at all (no one from his family, although his mom wanted to be in the room when she was born, but she lived 8 hours away, and I said heck no to that anyway ha ha).

Gah sorry for my rambling!!!! Didn't mean to make my post so long!

Oh, and if you do not want your baby's picture posted online unless you are the one doing it, I wouldn't send out picture messages. Had I known my in laws would do this I would've told my husband not to send them her picture. Because as soon as she was born, his mom immediately posed her picture online (I felt I should be the one to post her picture, IF I wanted it posted, which I didn't!)

Also, I would suggest having a back up name for baby (or even keeping it secret until baby is born) and bring a few outfits for take home. I always brought one boy and one girl outfit just in case and since my girls were born in fall I bought a heavy sleeper and a light sleeper for take home clothes since I didn't know how cold it would be outside.

With the name thing, I say that because I know where I am (military base) a lot of people are having babies around the same time or a few months before me and I want to make sure my baby is named different (but that's just me!) For example, my husband and I discussed Oliver for a boy's name with a J name for his middle name (my girls both have Es after my middle name, and DH is J, so just going with that trend ha) and one of his friend's just had a baby named Oliver John! Ha ha.

Also, any feelings of sadness, do not be afraid to talk to your health care provider about it. I made sure I did after my 2nd (although I wasn't diagnosed with postpartum) and I wish my sister had after her 2nd (I swear she had postpartum with how she acted afterwards). It happens to a lot of women and you shouldn't ever feel ashamed with how you feel!

Okay, I think I am done, ha ha.

mommyof1.5's picture
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I also agree about educating yourself. Unfortunately, getting information solely from people that are selling their products/services can mean buying more than you need. (Like being scared into a C-section, if you really wanted a natural birth - as in my case)

Water water water!

I also try to figure out what nutrients are in foods that I crave, and make sure I am getting extra of the nutrients, not just the specific foods.

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I'm a first-timer and these are all great tips! Thanks ladies!

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I can only agree, educating yourself and knowing what's best for you and the baby is soooo important. The birth of a child is a life changing event, a moment you will never forget and you should have no regrets. So having the knowledge will help you decide and you'll be able to be in charge and not just be a bystander at the birth of YOUR baby.

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Don't be scared of postpartum depression. Talk to your doctor.

My son's first 3 months are a haze to me. All I remember is crying. All. The. Time. I never wanted to hurt him, but I was sad. It was rough and I regret I didn't talk to my doctor sooner.

You are not alone. There are things that can help.