Older sibling's questions...

10 posts / 0 new
Last post
daria's picture
Last seen: 3 years 9 months ago
Joined: 07/22/03
Posts: 496
Older sibling's questions...

Anyone else with older children having to answer some "tender" questions about being pregnant?

Last night in the car DS told me he wanted to see how the baby comes out.

Today at daycare he flat out asked our daycare provider how the baby comes out and then he asked how it got in there.

Anyone else dealing with this, or have any delicate answers for an almost 4 year old boy?

KET_2010's picture
Last seen: 2 years 8 months ago
Joined: 08/13/11
Posts: 1737

When I was pregnant with DD2 my first daughter was about 4. She asked how the baby got in my tummy.

She has also asked how I made a baby.

I have just told her that when a Mommy and a Daddy decide they want a baby sometimes a baby gets put into a Mommy's belly. I also let her know that they do this when they love each other very much.

I haven't had the sex talk with her (I know some people have this early on, and she is 6 now) but I'm thinking we might have to soon only because she is getting older and I would hate for her to hear it from kids at school.

fittoac's picture
Last seen: 3 years 10 months ago
Joined: 05/05/08
Posts: 383

My daughter has seen her birth video several times (she's a little obsessed with it, actually) so she has no questions of how the baby gets out. When we told her I was pregnant one of the very first things she said was, "Is it gonna come out your bottom!??" Haha! So that one has pretty much been covered. Fortunately, she has not asked about how the baby got in there in the first place. She's probably too young to formulate such a thought. Smile

AnnaRO's picture
Last seen: 5 months 1 week ago
Joined: 07/06/08
Posts: 7033

My DD just turned 1, so fortunately no questions from her.

Last seen: 4 years 2 months ago
Joined: 06/15/11
Posts: 611

When I was expecting my son my daughter had a few questions.. We ended up getting What to expect when mommy is having a baby. I totally recommend the book for anyone with kids older then 2. It is a great book!! I love the fact it gives the just the right amount of information that answers the questions, without giving false information.

Here is a link to the book just so you know what I am talking about! http://www.amazon.com/What-Expect-When-Mommys-Having/dp/0694013218

mommyof1.5's picture
Last seen: 4 years 2 days ago
Joined: 08/06/07
Posts: 897

My oldest was 19 months old when my second was born. She's also seen plenty of the baby shows, some where they are being pushed out and others where they are cut out. I've shown my kids my c-section scar, and they understand that menstruation happens when there is no baby in there... and they have a general idea of the location of where this all happens. They don't have any idea how the baby got in there though. I try give the simplest answers possible, until they extend their questioning to require more detail. Smile

ourfirstblessing's picture
Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 1094

:lurker: my oldest was 4 in july and youngest will be 3 soon. they've asked and we've told them that mommy will push the baby out when he's big and strong. giving them even a small answer seemed to satisfy, if he persists you could tell him he comes out of where mommy's go potty. i think it's perfectly ok to explain how things happen and giving an answer will satisfy his mind Smile

jolly11sd's picture
Last seen: 3 years 8 months ago
Joined: 02/02/05
Posts: 3327

My DS1 was 5 during my last birth and will be 6years old for this birth. We actually had planned on him being present for his brother's birth last year as we had a planned homebirth. He was there through labor but I actually ended up delivery at the hospital and he stayed behind at home. We totally talked about how the baby would come out (in easy terms) since he was going to be there, watched natural birth videos on the net, and had a great kids book about birth that we read each night.

The book we used was "Welcome With Love", by Jenni Overend. It totally tells the story of a boy that is there throughout the labor and delivery of his new brother. Its a childrens book that is illustrated and it is set as a homebirth. In the book it talks about how the baby came out from between his mom's legs so we totally ran with that term. It was enough information and an answer for him without getting into too many technical details. He believes that the baby coming out runs along the same lines as having a bowl movement. Pretty close in kid terms. It also talks about the placenta and cord so we had lots of long talks as to why those are important in helping the baby grow. When the question of how the baby got in there came up we just ran with a faith based answer. "Mom & Dad love each other so much that God helped us grow another baby inside my tummy. We have to keep the baby in there so that it can grow strong enough to be born." Not an answer for everyone but it worked for us.

PsycheGal's picture
Last seen: 2 years 12 months ago
Joined: 12/07/08
Posts: 768

My daughters are 4 and 6 - they both know that babies come out of the vagina and have seen birth videos as well as those medical birthing simulations.

My youngest doesn't seem to care how they get in there in the first place, but my oldest did ask me.

I told her that mommies have eggs in their ovaries and daddies carry a seed that goes in there and when the seed goes into the egg the baby can grow. I didn't have to explain how the seed gets in there, I just said Daddy gives mommy the seed and that was good enough for her.

Neither my husband or I feel weird about explaining reproduction but we do of course try not to make it confusing by over-explaining. My kids are both well aware of their anatomy and internal organs, so they both already know they have ovaries and that they are for reproductive purposes. If the home birth pans out, they will both be there to greet their little sibling when he/she is born.

I have found, at least with my kids, that if you don't make a big deal over it, they just say "Oh okay" or "That's cool" and move on.

Dixiemom1st's picture
Last seen: 3 years 10 months ago
Joined: 09/07/07
Posts: 620

DS has not really asked any tough questions and DD is too young yet. So I have not had to deal with this yet.

Cute story though. When My sister was expecting her 3rd, her older boys, 4 and 2, told everyone that the baby would come out by climbing a ladder inside of her and that he had a flashlight so he could see. Their dad is a volunteer firefighter, so I think they got talked a lot about ladders and flashlights. It was very cute.