Ok, here's a positive thing I can add, that is just helping ME keep my sanity. I am really trying hard to focus on and super appreciate the moments when DD does stuff that is SUPER cute. Recently, she's been pulling my books off the shelf (ok, no, that she's been doing for a long time actually) and "reading" them. I have one shelf that has mostly cookbooks and yoga books on it. She will pull a cookbook or a yoga book down and sit and study them for a good long time. It is adorable. Apparently, we may share some similar interests someday. Also, eating is pretty standard, but, if I just stop and watch her, I am amazed how all of a sudden she eats with forks and spoons and she rarely drops food on herself if she's paying attention to what she's doing. She is so capable! And then there are the times when she displays her understanding/thinking that just blow me away.... sometimes I ask her something, or tell her something, and she just reacts in ways that I would't necessarily expect. Like, she knows what I'm saying, and takes things a step further.
She's driving me crazy, but, if I stop and make myself appreciate how amazing she is, it makes it a bit easier to get through the day.
Also, the one time when she still needs me like she ever did is at bedtime or when she wakes at night. So when she's half asleep and all she wants is to cuddle into ME (not daddy, not anyone else, ME) then I sit there and I just love her back. Sometimes the awake times aren't easy (ok, a lot of the time lately), but, these are the things that are helping me get through it all.
There, finally, a positive note from me.
Mara & Joel, 2009
I think that's why I loved cosleeping so much and miss it. They're well-behaved when they are asleep.
We all get crazy from time to time. A very peaceful zen-like mom friend of mine said one time in the middle of the night she ended up yelling, "why can't you just sleep, you
" to her infant. I felt bad laughing but it's good to know we all get to that point where we just NEED TO GET AWAY.
The good part is as the kids get older they get it more. I can say, especially to my 7-year-old, I'm too angry. I need to take a break. We can talk later. Hopefully she learns from that and does the same thing! It'd be much nicer than her just falling apart and screaming (which she only does when she's hungry so it's a pretty obvious "tell" that she needs to eat but she hasn't quite been convinced yet).
Natalie & Dan - June 2, 2001
Samma - Nov. 5, 2004
Tommy - Oct. 19, 2007