I feel bad posting over here, but I am at wits end. I feel bad because I feel like a bad mom, I don't know what I did to my baby to make him so miserable.
So at his 6 wk appt the dr said he is hypersensitive. My first baby was very similar, but she was the first, so it didn't effect like it is now. Q has bouts/days where he screams wihtout reason other than he wants to be held. (I sound horrible I know) but I can't go to the bathroom, I can't cook, I can't clean, I can't spend time wiht my other kids. My 2 yr old runs around and ruins everything in my house, I can't speak for fear I might wake baby. Either I have screaming baby (blood curdling screams, not just a little whining, accompanied by gagging, spitting up, coughing, hyperventilating) or the 2 yr old rips everything to shreds, climns the countertops, pulls everything out of the overhead cabinets.
I am sitting her in tears because I don't know what to do. My husband is constantly mad at me because the baby screaming is my fault. I never get sleep. As much as I try to relax to get baby to relax (baby feeding off of my stress), I can't. My husband won't take the baby, if he does then when I come back (even for 5-10 minutes) baby is covered in spit up, screaming, and my husband is not paying attention because he wants to block out the noise, the baby needs to learn, etc.
I nearly feel like a prisoner. I love my baby and he is such a great baby, when he isn't screaming. But that I must hold him and entertain him all day, is too much. He doesn't sleep at night, literally I am not just saying that. I don't know what to do. any help or advice would be much appreciated.
They won't run any tests on him when I asked if it could be allergies. My brain no longer functions I am that sleep deprived, I wanted to say something but I totally forget.
I'm so sorry that you are going through all of that! :bighug: The only thing that I can think of is a possible solution... have you tried baby wearing? If you found a maya wrap or a ring sling - something that keeps your baby in constant contact with you, but leaves you hands free to deal with your 2 year old - it may help you be able to handle everything a bit better. It's worth a try, at any rate... there is a baby-wearing board here that has a whole bunch of really great ladies might be able to help and may have gone through something similar. Hang in there, momma!
I agree with baby wearing. I think it would make you and your baby happier. Have you noticed any pattern? Does he seem to be more upset after eating? When you lay him down as opposed to sitting him up? Does he seem gassy? Or is he just really needy and can't stand to be separated from you? Have you tried swaddling? That seems to work for some babies to give them a little extra sense of security.
You mentioned him spitting up when your husband is "watching" him. Could it possibly be gas or reflux? Have you tried mylicon drops? My first was frequently fussy, and mylicon drops seemed to help him. (I think he swallowed a lot of air when nursing. He didn't have a proper latch.)
You don't say whether you're using formula or BFing. If you are using formula, you can try to switch to see if he may be allergic to either milk or soy (or both). If you BF, you could try an elimination diet to see if it's a food sensitivity. Is he having any unusual stools? (Green? Mucousy?)
I would suggest all things the other ladies mentioned. (((Hugs))) as I know it's hard in the early days. Prayers you can sort something out so you can get some sleep.
Thanks for the replies. He is nearly 6 months old, so he is past the NB phase. I am in Germany, so our meds here a little different. He has something called "sab simplex" for gassiness and bigaia (probiotic) for overall digestion. He diapers are pretty much just liquid, with occassoinal mucousy texture.. He is still EBF. I am guessing he is around 20lbs, physically seems very healthy. His face seems to always break out, it is more than Baby acne IMO. He has several spots on his face that I can't tell if they are freckles or scars from baby acne?
I do wear him a lot, but he doesn't sleep. It keeps him from screaming (well, getting him in there is all screams, but once he is there he is ok.) I have a few different ones, but mainly use the ergo, but my problems with that are. The waist belt when innn front carry rides up and rests on my kidneys, causing kidney and back pain. Front carry, I can't sit down. Fornt carry I can't lean over without holding onto him, Front carry I can't play on the floor. Front carry I can't cook or clean because my arms aren't long enough :lol: So I feel like I can only stand or use one arm to work. I have tried the back carry a few times, but he is still young for that and I can't do it well by myself. :/ Then front or back carry at the end of the day I still have back ache (just before/at the beginning of his pregnancy I was in PT for back problems.)
Swaddling is sort of the same, always a fight to get him in, but once he is there, it is ok. But now he is crawling on all fours, so I think swaddling is dangerous?
I love that he loves me so much, but I also need a break. It just isn't possible that he always falls asleep in my arms and I am not allowed to move.
Also just a clue on his personality, he very rarely sleeps in the car seat. He usually just screams in the car (KWIM many babies that lulls them to sleep?) I think it is more than typical seperation anxiety. which is what people often say to me. I just don't know what to do?
It sounds like he has a food allergy or sensitivity. It can cause a lot of the symptoms you are describing. I remember when Dakota was younger he had a food sensitivity (and still does but it has eased some) and it caused horrible liquid poo that looked like almost pure stomach acid. It might be a place to start to see if there is an underlying culprit.
There is a discussion about a very similar issue on the large family board, and you should lurk over there and read it. The baby's doctor suggested that the mother switch to a formula for a week that is for babies with milk protein sensitivity. While she was doing that and pumping, she had also eliminated allergens from her diet (milk, eggs, soy, nuts, berries, wheat). There was an immediate difference in the baby when she switched him to the formula, and then when she went back to BF, the problem was gone. I will try to find the thread and post here.
ETA: Here's the link http://www.pregnancy.org/bulletinboa...-update-post-6
Thanks! I have tried 2 wks dairy elimination, then per drs order drink a lot of milk and see if things change. But the problem is it isn't regular. So I think it is some sort of additive that I don't realize I am eating. I don't know if he would actually drink from a bottle, he refuses/fights pacifiers and the few times we've randomly tried to get him to take a bottle.
Now off to check out the other thread.
I appreciate all the help!
You might be surprised. My daughter wouldn't take a pacifier either (oh boy how I wish she would have since they are easier to get rid of than the thumb), but I had to switch since Eli had to have heart surgery and the stress dried me up. The key was finding the right bottle (leave it to my daughter to be picky) and having someone else start the process (i.e. friend, neighbor, family member - not just DH). Oh and we had to go cold turkey when switching her. Hope that helps some.
It definitely sounds like something's going on other than just the typical fussy baby sort of thing. I like the elimination diet - not just diary or whatever but the full on elimination diet.