My second DD had what sound like similar issues. She started speech therapy and developmental therapy around age 2. It took a little while, but it worked wonders! She needed a way to communicate (she was very speech delayed) and her DT would push her into situations where she was frustrated and teach her how to deal with the frustration. It takes time, but you should see results!
Katherine 7/5/02 Olivia 8/2/04 Freddie 5/31/07 Ellie 5/24/11 and Owen Benjamin 10/31/12