***Mandi's (Joley) Birth Lodge***

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MamaArty_RMT's picture
Joined: 11/09/05
Posts: 805
***Mandi's (Joley) Birth Lodge***

This might be too late for the prenatal love and support, but here's your lodge anyway hun. You deserve it!!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I was thinking about this today. I'm glad you started it for her. It would suck (for more than just this reason) if she never got the chance.

KUP on AF leak and any developments, Mandi.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Arg, where did they reply go?? Anyway, what I said was: Good idea, Ari. I'm sure Mandie will appreciate it. I hope all is well with her. And Mandie, when you see this, welcome to your lodge!!!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

Thanks guys!! HELLO! Biggrin I'll do my updates tomorrow while I'm waiting for *real* labor to kick in. Right now I'm patiently enjoying early labor and not enjoying the constant leakage. Blum 3

GarlicBreath's picture
Joined: 09/12/06
Posts: 488

Welcome to your lodge! Yahoo

How funny that you're full term already! What a nice surprise. Wink So it was definitely amniotic fluid?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Yes curious minds really want to know all the details! I'm excited that you were off on your dates, as it has been a concern with my UC.. Here is hoping you have a restful night then an exciting day soon.

Kally_Ann's picture
Joined: 12/15/06
Posts: 237

Thats sweet finding out your at term!!:) Good luck with everything! And enjoy the early labour!!! So exciting!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am interested in your story... I too didn't get to use my lodge as I went into labor right after it was started. But I had a fantastic birth so I hope you do too.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Woo hoo! Welcome to your lodge!! Smile

CJWilkes's picture
Joined: 01/04/09
Posts: 880

Yahoo Welcome to your lodge!

Joined: 05/05/04
Posts: 435

welcome!!

aveyronaise's picture
Joined: 06/18/07
Posts: 83

ohh cool ! wee hoo, here you go!

GarlicBreath's picture
Joined: 09/12/06
Posts: 488

I'm stalking your blog! :jumpingbeans:

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

First off, the obligatory, "who am I" post.

Mandie, married 4.5 years (together nearly 8!) to Luke. Mommy to Quentin, 3. Quentin was my stubborn boy and thwarted all of my natural labor plans by being breech. I was seeing CNMs for my pregnancy with him, planning an in-hospital water birth. But alas, my 10 lb breech baby was to be ripped forcibly from my womb (yes, I'm melodramatic).

On April 4th of this year, I had what I thought was my last period. Evidently I was mistaken, and the previous one was my last "true" period. But I digress. I've had a beautiful pregnancy. I only started getting uncomfortable the last week or so. I was thinking, "oh boy, 5 more weeks of this" LOL. But it turns out I had a perfect pregnancy and only got uncomfortable the last week of it. Smile

Stay tuned for stage 2!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

As you know (if you read my earlier entries), my bag of waters (aka amniotic sac) broke on Monday, 12/10, at around 10 p.m. We went to bed, unsure that was actually what had happened (it was a slow leak at that point). Through the night I continued to gush little by little and slept TERRIBLY. But I had little doubt my water had indeed broken. I thought I was 35.5 weeks, making it PPROM (preterm premature rupture of membranes). I figured the safest thing to do, for my baby, was see someone ASAP.

Tuesday morning, 12/11, I started frantically calling midwives. We moved to Chicagoland a month(ish) ago, and I had JUST gotten state healthcare set up. I was still waiting for my official medical card, and thought I had time yet. The midwife I finally talked to said I needed to go to the city if I didn't want a repeat cesarean. She gave me two hospital options, and I called Luke home from work.

I began calling my SIL (our childcare 3 hours away) to come and watch our son at the hospital, updating the Internet on what was happening, and packing our bag for the hospital. The whole time I'm packing, I'm crying "I don't WANT to go to the hospital!!!" Like a 3-year-old who detests his nap.

Finally, around 2:30, we arrived at the hospital. I was expecting to be checked in ER before being send up to L&D, but nope. They wheeled me right up. Turns out they don't let children under 16 on the L&D floor AT ALL. So my kid wouldn't be allowed to visit me as long as I was there. BOO. My nurse, Mara, was WONDERFUL. But she was off at 4. Sad They had me on continuous fetal monitoring, but assured me I'd be able to be mobile at least as far as the cords would reach. Mara assured me they had birthing balls/stools, etc.

I spent a lot of time declining procedures. I declined an IV, declined a Hep Lock, declined pitocin augmentation and a pitocin shot after delivery. Declined a cesarean (just in case), declined all kinds of crap for the baby. Also declined any internal exams except a sterile speculum, because HELLO, infection risk.

I found out they take the baby from you after he's born as standard procedure and take him to the nursery. Dad can stay to watch from a window IF the baby doesn't need to go to NICU. In NICU, the curtains are closed. Um, Excuse me???

Evidently my crazy hippie ways attracted the attention of the head resident. She came in to lecture me, making sure to tell me first that she had been a CNM for 25 years. Insert Eyeroll here, I perfectly well know some CNMs are no better than OBs as far as interventions go. She lectured me about how "dangerous" I was being. She insisted on a sterile vaginal exam, which I consented to mostly out of curiosity. I was at 50% effacement and no dilation. They did an u/s to determine size and position, because I was measuring big (41 cm) and palpation led them to believe he was big. Turns out I'm around 40 weeks and he's probably around 8 lbs (they said 9 but you know how that goes).

The resident bullied the hell out of me, honestly. She wanted to get me on pitocin right away to get things moving. I was terrified, since my SIL just had tons of problems with her induction, and I know augmentation is bad for VBACs, increasing the chance of uterine rupture. Plus, when your body's not ready, it doesn't work! And I would have ended up with a cesarean. So I told her, ok, I'll try the pitocin. But I want you to understand I'm NOT going to consent to a c-section later on just because you decide time is up. I will not consent to a section except in the case of an emergency.

She practically SCREAMED "dead baby" at me. I tell you what. I'm well read, educated, and supported in my ideas about natural birth. I know what the hell I'm talking about. I can't imagine being a woman with less information and less, well, thick-headedness being in that situation and not caving. I felt terrible as it was. She kept saying, "is that what you want? Is that what you want for your baby? Oh, I wanted to slap her.

In the end, they said I had "tied their hands." She said I had come to them for care but wouldn't let them give me the care they thought was best. So it was best that I found a different hospital. I about died of relief. I didn't want to be the one to say, "LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!" because I could see the establishment construing that as negligence or something stupid.

So now I'm home. I'm thinking I'll live-blog this labor, since my idea of waiting to tell anyone I'm in labor until after the baby's born went out the window. now that you're caught up, following is the general idea of the format of my posts over the next couple (hopefully only a couple) of days.

35 hours ruptured: My baby is term, head-down, and LOA. I've had PROM, but not PPROM. I'm having small contractions on a fairly regular basis. I'm getting ready to walk (we're going to the grocery) and hope that helps. I have a couple other ideas up my sleeve, but I'm not going to push too hard today. My body knows what it's doing. It will happen when I'm ready. Perhaps if I'm not in active labor by the time Irene (my SIL, and baby-watcher) has to go home, I'll bust out the heavy guns. I'm not really worried about infection as I'm keeping things out of the birth canal and am mostly at home, where my body is familiar with the germs. I'm monitoring my temperature and of course my symptoms. So far everything is great.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Woohoo!!

Joined: 10/22/06
Posts: 1033

I can't even tell you how excited I am for you! Wishing you tons of ELV!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Good for you!!! You are so inspiring. I am blown away by that hospital. No dads in the NICU??? WTF is that about???
Have fun walking today Smile

aveyronaise's picture
Joined: 06/18/07
Posts: 83

girl it is like you went back to the 40's or something with that hospital !
i admire your cajones (ovaries:))

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I have to admit, what you are going through is what I have worried about my entire pregnancy in terms of accuracy of dates, hospital reaction, etc. Knowing you have the strength to be able to stand up for the best options for you and your baby is incredible. I look forward to reading more of your updates. In fact i'm kind of giddy with excitement for you.

If at some point you decide to try nipple stimulation (and your ds is weaned) I have heard that stimulation from the spouse is more effective than using a pump or your own hands, and makes them feel more involved in the birth process.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am just awed (and not in a good way), by the behavior of some of the hospital staff. Though I suppose it shouldn't surprise me. I've seen it in my field, DH complains about it in his, and my mom just started her recovery from it (retirement!) in hers.

I'm glad dates have been adjusted and it's a safer time for ROM and the oven bell is ready to ding. KUP as you can.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Congratulations on your lodge, I'm enjoying your posts :).

klmj's picture
Joined: 11/24/06
Posts: 535

Welcome to your lodge! I'll be stalking you now. Lots of (((ELV))) coming your way.

I, too, can't believe the hospital...dads can look through a window at the nusery? Nothing at the NICU? Seems odd. Glad you got outta there Wink

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

"MarysBuns" wrote:

If at some point you decide to try nipple stimulation (and your ds is weaned) I have heard that stimulation from the spouse is more effective than using a pump or your own hands, and makes them feel more involved in the birth process.

Thanks for that info! I was just thinking about getting out my pump. I was trying with my own hands at the hospital but it was just really sore and didn't seem to be helping. I'll look into good ways for him to do it and what he should do! Smile About to do another short update from the morning. I have to catch up and make lots of posts since I skipped 4 lodge weeks. Smile

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

38 hours ruptured: Just got back from breakfast and a shopping trip. I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to not be in the hospital. I will probably say that 028930289308 more times, but the more I do things I know I couldn't do there, the more grateful I am.

At the hospital, I wouldn't have been allowed to eat. By now, I'd undoubtedly be FAMISHED or cut open. And exhausted. And in pain. Sure, I would maybe be holding my baby already, but I'm so much more willing to give it a couple of days than put us through the risk of unnecessary surgery. And I know my body will work better when I can rest, eat, drink, and move as I feel is best.

The walking didn't really do much. It was kind of meandering more than anything, which is probably why. I need to get out on the walking path by the park and do some serious moving. But right now I'm just tired. I didn't sleep well, despite my best efforts. Probably the longest stretch was 4-7:15. I guess I should get used to that, but I know right now I need my sleep, need my rest. I think I'm going to take advantage of Luke being home and Irene being here and try for a nap. Much as I would rather sort baby clothes. Smile

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

"Joley" wrote:

Thanks for that info! I was just thinking about getting out my pump. I was trying with my own hands at the hospital but it was just really sore and didn't seem to be helping. I'll look into good ways for him to do it and what he should do! Smile About to do another short update from the morning. I have to catch up and make lots of posts since I skipped 4 lodge weeks. Smile

I'm sure he will figure some thing out.. More than anything I wonder what his reaction would be to "Hey honey, Do you mind playing with my breast for a little bit?" I know my hubby would jump at the opportunity, but be upset that in return he's not getting any play time...at least that is what I assume my hubby's reaction would be.

Joined: 05/24/05
Posts: 944

As I've said in the other thread, I'll certainly be stalking your "live labor blog"! Do you have a webcam? lol!

Congrats on your lodge, and on being 40 weeks!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

"rmacburn" wrote:

As I've said in the other thread, I'll certainly be stalking your "live labor blog"! Do you have a webcam? lol!

Hahaha, I DO have a webcam but, um, NO. LoL. Liveblogging is enough. It isn't too exciting until things actually start to happen, though, I imagine. Smile

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

41 hours ruptured: Just woke up from a nap, feeling pretty refreshed! My contractions haven't changed much. Quentin is napping right now, but when he's awake, we're all going to go across the way to the park. They have wonderful play structures AND a beautiful paved walking/biking path. Irene & Q are going to play while Luke and I make with the walking. If that doesn't start contractions, I'm gonna need another nap! LOL. I have a couple of other tricks up my sleeve after that, and of course will keep you all posted!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

I'm not ready to post this on my blog yet, but I'm considering Castor Oil tonight or tomorrow if nothing else works. I'm a little nervous because I know it can cause intense contractions. But I'm going to try some heavy walking and nipple stim first. I AM consitpated, though, so CO would help with that, too. I have found several stories on a quick search of VBAC PROM + Castor Oil working within a few hours.

I know they say all natural induction (well most of the time ALL induction) techniques only work if your body's ready, but I figure the ROM is a good indication it's as ready as it's going to be without going on its own, yes?

I am torn. I want to get things moving, but with my SIL here and not knowing exactly what we're planning, I feel like I might relax more if nothing happens until she goes home. But I don't want to wait that long! LOL. I'll keep you posted, of course.

Joined: 07/29/03
Posts: 147

I'm sooo excited for you that your baby is safe to make his/her entrance! I'm really enjoying your updates. Your children are lucky to have such a strong, informed mother Smile

My doctor recommended taking a turn on the swings when I was in prodromal labour, and to make sure I "really pumped it". She said that since I had SPD and walking was difficult I would find the swings easier PLUS it added centrifugal force to the mix. It certainly was more fun than trudging around the neighbourhood!

As for the castor oil, if you aren't accustomed to using it for digestive issues, I'd recommend starting out with a tablespoon or two and gradually working your way up, since you don't know how sensitive you are to it. I had no success with it (not even in the non-pregnancy related effects) but I did find that all of those 'recipes' you find online to make it more palatable were BUNK! It was NASTY *shudder* The only thing I found that worked for me was to slam the oil back as fast as I could and then IMMEDIATELY eat a fresh orange or fresh pineapple (the pineapple is actually supposed to have some induction properties as well).

Nipple stimulation works by triggering oxytocin production in your body. Touch from a trusted sexual partner (even non-sexual touch) can also trigger oxytocin release, so if your nipples are just too sensitive, taking breaks from the nipple stim. and using the time for some relaxing massage from your partner can actually help, too Smile

Stef

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

"Joley" wrote:

I am torn. I want to get things moving, but with my SIL here and not knowing exactly what we're planning, I feel like I might relax more if nothing happens until she goes home. But I don't want to wait that long! LOL. I'll keep you posted, of course.

I think you will do what makes you most comfortable. With SIL being out of the loop on the plans, having her there may be causing you to stay tense and not relax like you thought it would. i am hoping to hear that the nipple stimulation and walking are enough to get something really happening for you, and that maybe you deliver while Q sleeps so that you won't feel the need to have the extra body hanging around while you labor.

You may also be stressing from the ROM without strong contrax. You may want to consider a long shower with some relaxing scents in the bathroom to help you relax and let your instincts take over. Maybe talk to baby boy and tell him about how exited you are that he is debating his birth date Wink Don't put too much thought on the ROM, after all there are women that have ROM at 25+ weeks and their bodies aren't ready for labor then, they just get monitored for infection. So relax think about it as baby will come when its ready and there is nothing you can do to force it before that, unless of course you want to go back to that CNM.

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

Can I break for a moment and say how infuriated and SAD I am that I didn't get a baby shower? Evidently 2nd children don't warrant them. Beee I wasn't looking for gifts, but after sorting through our "leftover" baby clothes, we have NO newborn clothes and TWO 0-3 month outfits + some sleep sacks. I really could have used some help there. WHY aren't 2nd children special enough? Sad Ok, pregnancy hormones much?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Sympathy, you have lots of sympathy from me. I know exactly how you feel about the baby showers. I'm sure your family will get you some things after baby arrives.

Joined: 05/24/05
Posts: 944

Is it possible that someone planned a shower but thought they had lots of time before baby made an arrival?

Around here it's hit or miss if you get a shower for a second baby.

mandi04's picture
Joined: 08/10/03
Posts: 2272

How exciting, I hope all goes well and labor gets started soon so you can hold your little guy! Have you tried EPO? I know I've heard it helps soften the cervix, but I'm not sure how fast it works.
and second babies of the same gender especially don't 'deserve' a shower. :-? I'm still a little bitter myself. I had everything I needed for Sofia but I was really sad that she didn't seem to get as much excitement and attention as Cianna did.

GarlicBreath's picture
Joined: 09/12/06
Posts: 488

:bigarmhug:

Sorry about the shower...it seems like people usually bring gifts anyway. Maybe they just didn't realize how soon it was going to be!

I've been stalking you all day. THinking of you!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

No, my MIL flat-out told me 2nd babies don't get a shower. blah.

Actually, my MIL, and SIL have bought a couple outfits, but they were mostly bigger ones (cause #1 was HUGE!).

Ah welll. More labor updates to come!

MamaArty_RMT's picture
Joined: 11/09/05
Posts: 805

Well poo to your MIL!

You could always host yourself a "Meet the Baby". Some people are bound to bring stuff for the babe, even if you don't ask for it.

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

I am so tired of being hassled. I wish I could just go into my birth bubble and be left alone. Sad I AM NOT STUPID, PEOPLE!! I AM NOT GOING TO PUT MYSELF AND MY BABY AT RISK JUST TO "GET WHAT i WANT!"

Ugh.

Joined: 07/14/07
Posts: 382

"Joley" wrote:

I am so tired of being hassled. I wish I could just go into my birth bubble and be left alone. Sad I AM NOT STUPID, PEOPLE!! I AM NOT GOING TO PUT MYSELF AND MY BABY AT RISK JUST TO "GET WHAT i WANT!"

Ugh.

Seriously! Are you getting PMs or something about your decision? Who the heck do these people think they are?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Mandie--delurking to say that I'm wishing you a happy labor and delivery!

klmj's picture
Joined: 11/24/06
Posts: 535

"SandiCarr" wrote:

Seriously! Are you getting PMs or something about your decision? Who the heck do these people think they are?

I sure hope not! Thinking of you today...I love reading your updates.

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

Thanks guys. It's just the fam. They don't even know I'm planning to UC, just that I'm home now with ruptured membranes. Beee

47.5 hours ruptured: I give in. I had a "labor cocktail" an hour or so ago, with pineapple chaser. 1 shot castor oil, 1 shot vodka, 1 shot oj. YUCK. My tummy's not feeling great, but I'm hoping that's a good sign. Maybe I'll get lucky and do all my labor in the night so I can be at peace. Either that or even this won't work and I'm screwed. Sad People sure have been good at crapping out my self-esteem and resolve to be patient. Hopefully there's good cause.

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

48.5 hours ruptured: The castor oil is starting to work on my bowels, at least, if not my uterus. Hopefully that's a good sign. I'm more or less hopeful. My confidence is kind of shot right now, and I'm not even sure why.

I'm going to try and get some sleep (if I don't spend the night on the toilet) and hope my little guy has some mercy on his mama in the morning.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Oh boy, Mandie, I hope this is it. That castor oil doesn't have a reputation for no reason!

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!! Don't let the family be your splinter. You are strong, you are powerful, your body was made perfectly for birth.... I hope you have a nice rest, and I hope labor comes smoothly and easily for you.

ELV!!

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

49.5 hours ruptured: Ok, I think I'm officially in labor now. Not real stable or predictable, but there. Seems contractions are about 3-4 minutes apart, and about 30-50 seconds long. Still going to try to sleep - they're definitely uncomfortable but I think I might be able to get some rest.

klmj's picture
Joined: 11/24/06
Posts: 535

woohoo! Hope you can get some rest and the labor can progress a bit while you're sleeping.

Joined: 05/04/06
Posts: 250

Thats great news- hopefully you are able to rest a little before the little man shows up!

Amber_daisy's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 567

Wow! I'm a little late welcoming you to your lodge! I can't believe how fast things are moving for you! I know it probably doesn't seem like it to you, but had my membranes ruptured at what I thought was 35 weeks, I would have had a heart attack!

Anywho, I hope that the castor oil does the trick and we get to celebrate a new arrival here in the next few hours! Smile

Joley's picture
Joined: 05/10/04
Posts: 116

51 hours since rupture: I'm going to stop including the # of hours since rupture, because I'm going to be updating a lot more frequently. This is happening.

I'm learning already. Lying down (even on my left side) is good for feeling and timing contractions, it's BAD for pain management. Standing is best, leaning on Luke or on the towel bar in the bathroom. I'm sitting on my birth ball right now, which is perfect between contractions, but not great for during.

I'm going to do some googling and see how far along I need my contractions to be before I get in the water. Sitting doesn't sound very pleasant, but WARM does. We'll see.

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