Welcome to your lodge~ Not much longer, now...
DH - Gordon (aka Woody) 2/29/08
DS1 - Justin 3/11/98
DS2 - Gordy 11/2/08
I am Fuchsia and my wonderful partner is Rob. This is my first child and Rob’s third. He has a son and daughter - his daughter is with us part time and is really awesome. He son lives far from us unfortunately. We also have two furbabies - Loki (an 18 year old kitty) and Sophie.
Rob and I met just over three years ago while working on a new building that houses child and family services. We had both just had a rough spot with our jobs that led us to take part in a job training program. He was the facility manager and I was the receptionist. I was in the building for a bit with my old job getting them moved in (and then I was being laid off!). He tells me that he saw rushing around the building for days and knew that he had to find out who I was and had to get to know me! (He did some sneaky work to get me on the radar of his boss so that I could stay in the building!) One day I was rushing around trying to fix a computer problem and I saw this cute spikey haired man and he gave me a data stick and promised everything would be ok! Next thing I know I am working in the same area as him. We went to a retreat for professional development and car pooled (at his insistence) and chatted at lunch. That was the day that he really caught my attention. We went for coffee and carpooled for work but I was worried about being with someone at work. So when he asked if we wanted to see what would happen between us I said we shouldn’t (I was an idiot that night)! That lasted less than 12 hours! Three years later we are so glad we decided not to care that we worked together!
About two months into our relationship we found out that I was pregnant. I had an IUD but didn’t think it would be a problem. I saw the doctor to get it removed but it was stuck. I saw a specialist who said I would need to have it removed in hospital but that it would be tough to get in at Christmas time. So I waited. I wish that I hadn’t! I ended up in the ER with an infection. They did a surgery to get the IUD (which was piercing the side of my cervix) but it was too late for the baby. Between the infection, the trauma of the surgery and the amount of stress I had been under baby didn’t make it. It was the worst moment of my life. I know that baby was sick and that he would have had a really rough time had he made it and that it was for the best. It was also terrible timing for our jobs and relationship. It worked out better this way, but it was still crushing. We held onto that grief for a long time. We decided to wait till things were better financially and be able to bring a child into a stable family, not a relationship that was just starting out. In the end though it just brought us closer together.
I have had baby fever ever since though. I was just waiting patiently until the right moment. Last November I decided that we had waited long enough (good thing Rob agreed)! We both had good jobs, our life was pretty stable. So I went off my pills and we started doing natural birth control (charting etc) which really meant that every month I was just hoping for an oops! Then in March I said that the only month it would be best to avoid as a birthday would be December (as both of our birthdays are in December - in fact my EDD is the day before mine!)…and we were promptly preggers! It was the only month we actually tried to avoid it!
I always knew that I would have a midwife as my mom had a midwifery background so it is normal to me. In all my childhood I rarely heard of people going to hospital for babies, they were born at home. This was all completely foreign to Rob, but he was willing to support my decisions and trust me. The more he has learned the more he is supportive though! He thinks our midwife is great and is entirely supportive of the homebirth. I have given him a tonne of info. We watched BOBB and half way through he turned to me and said he wanted to homebirth too! The birth of DSD was not all he could have hoped for but he didn’t know it could be different. This time around he has a lot more info. My family is entirely supportive of the whole thing. His family and friends were a bit more concerned, but once again the more info we have given them the less worried they are. I recently gave everyone a copy of the BC College of Midwives Homebirth Handbook and suddenly everyone is a lot less worried! They had no idea how much preparation goes into it and that if something goes array that we transfer to hospital. A bit of education has gone a long way.
I have had a pretty easy pregnancy. I was sick as a dog for 6 weeks, but once that was done I did pretty well. At 18 weeks we had the ultrasound and saw that we are having a healthy baby girl. I have really had no complaints other than some back issues which needed a good massage or two. At this point I am healthy and happy and all set for a homebirth. I stop working at the end of this week and can’t wait!
Unfortunately Rob is not so healthy. He has a virus that is causing some serious vertigo. We have tried every avenue of treatment and although he is getting better it is not fast. He has been off work for almost 2 months! And then he went and broke a rib. Talk about bad timing! We are both very hopeful that he will be better by the time the birth rolls around. I am staying optimistic and trying hard not to stress and worry…it is not always easy, but it is what one has to do sometimes.
Anyways… that brings us up until now. I had an appointment today and everything is looking good. we are set for a homebirth. the babe is looking healthy and so am I. we did the GBS swab so hopefully that comes back clear. we have another appointment next week for a home visit to go over the birth plan, pain releif options and homebirth plans.
so here are some pics...
Me and Rob
our kitties loki and sophie
Rob's kids at the beach last summer
me this summer - we did some maternity pics at the park. they turned out awesome!
Whew! that was a long intro!
Welcome to your lodge! Great intro. I can't wait to hear more about you and your story.
My hubby and I met at work too, and it took me awhile to get
"okay" with dating someone at work. I had sworn off it!
Wonderful intro! I am really looking forward to your homebirth.
Mommy to three gorgeous girls
at 6 weeks 22/10/09
Great intro and wonderful pictures. I'm very excited about your upcoming homebirth and can't wait to hear all about how it goes. How awesome to have your mom have a midwifery background. Glad you could educate everyone who doesn't understand.
Am feeling really tired today. just tried to go for groceries and got quite dizzy. I am really glad that I am done work after this week cause I am not sure I would make it much longer! I am so big and uncomfortable - am so done with being preggers! I wish it were a couple weeks from now so that this baby could come out.
Ok whining done.
The last bit can be so difficult.....that is nice that you will be done work soon....make sure to take some time and pamper yourself.
Mommy to three gorgeous girls
at 6 weeks 22/10/09
Your getting close, and I hope you get a good night of sleep. WooHoo for being almost done with work that's awesome!
thank you for sharing your story. you look great! that's great that you've been able to calm family fears and have supportive people around you. i'm looking forward to hearing more of your story and sharing this journey with you!
<3 Dh Jason 3/22/03
Baby #4 11/24/13
Great story! I need to post some pictures on my lodge...
You are so lucky that you get off work before your due date. I totally wasn't planning on it - but the more pregnant I get, the more I understand why people do it. Who knew growing a baby would be so tiring! But - I have a really understanding boss, so my plan is to start working from home the week of Thanksgiving - 2 weeks before my due date.