I'm so excited for your lodge, I can't believe it's already time! Give that baby belly a rub for me
Welcome to your lodge! Looking forward to fallowing it and getting to know more about you.
DS1-7/18/08, DS2-2/23/10, DS3 1/18/12
Welcome to your lodge!
Mara & Joel, 2009
Welcome to your lodge Brittany!!!
Okay, so I have been working on an intro in microsoft word, but I realized it's going to be really long, so I'm going to start posting it in installments...
I’m Brittany, 24, married to Tiatia, 27. DH is half-Tahitian and his name is pronounced “tee-UH-tee-UH” in English and “TEE-tee-uh” in Tahitian. I come from a background of having a dad who worked in a field where you move around a lot, and my DH ended up going into the same field.
DH and I met in 2005 at college in Utah. I was 20 and in my second year, working on my prerequisites for the Early Childhood Education program (certification for Pre-K to 3rd grade). DH moved in after Christmas break, and was just starting school because he had been serving a 2 year mission in New Jersey before that. My friends and I already knew his roommates, so naturally we eventually crossed paths. We started dating in April. He moved back in with his family, about 20 min away, to take his spring term classes at the secondary campus, and I was taking spring term classes at the main campus and I didn’t have a car. So we only saw each other on the weekends, but things still got serious pretty fast. We pretty much knew we wanted to get married about 2 months into the relationship. He moved back down to the main campus for summer term, but I wasn’t taking classes that term because my family had a family vacation to the Caribbean planned—so when we couldn’t even talk to each other for a whole week while I was in the Caribbean, we REALLY missed each other. He came to visit Nashville and meet my family for a weekend in July, and that is when we got officially engaged, as in he said “will you marry me?” and I said “yes,” though he didn’t give me a ring until Homecoming in October—and he did the whole “down on one knee” thing in a rose garden in the moonlight, which was beautiful.
My brother took our engagement pictures, so they were free. He has gotten really into photography since, but didn't know what he was doing as much here, but they turned out really good:
We were married December 30, 2005 in the Nashville, Tennessee LDS temple. It was a wonderful day. My parents wanted to do something special for us, so they paid for our honeymoon to the Sandals resort in the Bahamas, which was totally amazing. Here are some pictures from the wedding day:
Last edited by MrsMangoBabe; 04-12-2010 at 02:15 PM.
I had 2 semesters left to finish my degree after we got married. I went off BCPs about 2 months before the end of my student teaching. (Student teaching was a huge challenge for me, but a good learning experience). I had a false positive pregnancy test (it was this weird “reusable” test where you insert different strips into the same digital reader) and I thought I was pregnant for a few weeks because I never had AF. I found out I wasn’t pregnant after a huge ordeal that I don’t even want to talk about, but then I still didn’t have a period, just some very light spotting each month, so I went to this gynecologist at the student health center who did blood work (by then, because I had graduated, I didn’t have the student health insurance and so I paid out of pocket for it…wow, it was expensive) and diagnosed me with PCOS and gave me a prescription for metformin. By this time, I had taken a part time job as an afternoon teacher at the daycare for children of employees of the local hospital. I hadn’t looked for a job while I was student teaching because I thought I was pregnant, and the time I found out I wasn’t, my classmates had filled any openings I would have wanted to take. The metformin worked pretty fast to get my blood sugar regulated and my hormones back on track (I think some dietary guidelines would have worked just as well, but I didn’t know that at the time), and my chart showed ovulation about a month after I started taking it. Two weeks later I got a real positive pregnancy test.
I figured from my chart I was due around February 2, 2008. My part time job didn’t qualify me for insurance, and we couldn’t afford to pay for “spouse coverage” from the university. I found an OB office near where we lived who did free pregnancy tests , which I needed to get Medicaid coverage, so I went there for that, and then I decided to just go back there for prenatal care because I didn’t know enough about things to care who my doctor was. Plus, it was a private practice with just the one OB, and I liked that I’d see the same guy each time and he’d probably be the one to “deliver” my baby (I didn’t realize that this equaled ridiculously long waiting times for every appointment). I ended up having an ultrasound in my first trimester because I was bleeding kind of a lot, but everything was fine and the u/s gave me an EDD of February 6. Later we were thrilled to find out we were having a girl.
Ultrasound of DD at 24 weeks
Now, I had always figured I’d just get an epidural because I was young and uninformed about birth (I thought that the fact that I watched “A Baby Story” meant I knew something) and I thought everyone got epidurals. I didn’t understand why anyone wouldn’t. I thought “why would you have pain when you don’t have to?” and figured that if epidurals were as common as they seemed to be, they must be pretty safe. I thought God must have created epidurals so that women wouldn’t have to suffer.
During my pregnancy, a lot of things happened that led me to rethink my birth views. One thing was coming into contact with other women online, including on pregnancy.org, who had natural births, and I thought, “well, apparently some people think there is a good reason for it” but I mostly wrote them off as “hippies” and figured they must just be weird. Then, I saw an ad at Babies R Us for a seminar for “Hypnobirthing” and for some reason I was interested, so we went, even though we were already taking the hospital’s generic “prenatal course” at the time, because Medicaid would pay for it. It was basically an advertisement for a course, but it introduced me to the idea of hypnosis for childbirth and the idea that natural childbirth isn’t necessarily a horrible experience . I started having issues with some of the things taught in my hospital course, like how they assume everyone will get an epidural and the way they talked about giving routine preventative pitocin during the third stage as if it were not a big deal and like it was weird of me to question it when I did. I would have loved to taken the Hypnobirthing course, but I really didn’t have the time or money for it at that point. I did end up later buying the Hypnobirthing book and trying to use that to prepare, but it wasn’t enough for me to really be able to use it. Around this time, someone on my birth board told me about this board, and I joined. I realized that there were women who actually enjoyed the experience of natural childbirth, and they weren’t just crazies, either, and that for some woman, birth is more than just something to get through so you can be done being pregnant and meet your baby. I started reading books and articles people here recommended. I discovered that epidurals were not as simple as I had thought and that birth, as designed by God, is a beautiful and delicate process, and that interfering with that process can easily through it off track, leading to complications and a need for more interventions.
One of the books I read was The Thinking Woman’s Guide to a Better Birth, and I realized I had a lot more decisions to make other than just epidural or no epidural. I realized that if I wanted to try to do it naturally, and I was pretty sure I did, I needed to be free to move around and all of that, and I realized I needed to have a talk with my OB. Now, Dr. B was an older guy, and very old-fashioned. I had never really felt comfortable with him, but I didn’t know there could be anything better. Looking back now, I feel like he talked down to me and it bothers me that he would always lift up my shirt to check the heartbeat instead of just asking me to do it. My conversation with him about my birthing choices, much as would be expected knowing Dr. B, didn’t meet my satisfaction. He cited a ridiculously high episiotomy rate (“a third to a half”), said I didn’t have to get an epidural, but I’d have an IV and continuous monitoring, using scare tactics to try to talk me into thinking intermittent monitoring was a bad idea, he also said he didn’t do squatting births and claimed that gravity doesn’t do anything to help the baby come out, which still bugs me to think about even today.
So, needless to say, I went home that day and made an appointment with a CNM group that attends births at a smaller more NCB friendly hospital. I was 34 weeks when I had my first appointment with them. I was supposed to try to get appointments with all of the midwives before I had the baby, but there was one I never met, luckily she wasn’t on call when I had DD—the one who was on-call was actually the one I knew the best, which worked out really well. I was so much more comfortable with the midwives and they were really supportive of what I wanted. The birth story will be in the next post.
I got to have the experience of a lodge with DD’s pregnancy, and I really fell in love with the idea of the lodge tradition. You can find that lodge in the archives if you’re interested in looking at it.
My Belly Pics Slide Show from my pregnancy with DD:
Last edited by MrsMangoBabe; 02-09-2010 at 08:02 PM.