I think you're worrying is completely normal!
We have similar spacing with our kids (I have 12/07 and 8/09 and am due 5/11). I have to say, at the beginning of the pregnancy I kind of wanted twins because it sounds cool and I know a couple twin moms who handle it really well. But now... I would be completely freaking out if I had twins.
GL with the bowling ball feeling. I've never really had it, either. Sounds unpleasant.
big boy 12.8.07 @ 39+2 7lbs 8oz, 20.5" BFed for 13 months
middle boy 8.12.09 @ 39+4 7lbs 9oz, 21" BFed for 13.5 months
little boy 4.26.11 @ 38+4 6lbs 14oz, 19.5" BFed until 26mo and again 30-37mo
baby boy 10.25.13 @ 41+0 8lbs 15oz, 21.5"
8.16.12 & 12.16.12
I am glad you are getting rest and yay for baby dropping.
Christy birth doula, Hypnobabies instructor, small business owner & most importantly MOMMY.
Where to begin! I wish I could just give you a great big hug, from one twin mama to another. What your feeling is so completley normal & nothing to feel guilty about. You have a lot on your plate! My oldest & twins are 18 months apart, at the time I was still nursing my oldest & my husband worked two jobs with no break to help me after the babies were born - I remember feeling & worrying about the same things as you. My boys are ID and I really did fear that I would mix them up, I also worried about how nursing 3 babies was going to work & how in the world does one take care of so many little ones on their own, straight out of the hospital no less.
I can say that yes we had our hard days, but over all worrying about it was the worst part. I sometimes think the anticpation & worry that sometimes follows is scarier than actually doing it - once your IN it you just do it and it somehow works - somedays I think it's nothing short of a miracle lol
I'm so glad that you were able to feel better once you wrote all of that out, there's something to be said about allowing yourself a good emotional cleanse & release. Sounds like your babies felt it too!! Their getting into position lol
Your doing good Mama!! All will work out
I'm ready for the challenge again - thank you again!
DD3 & DD4 03/11
As I predicted, overnight Baby A has come back out of my pelvis and is floating around nearby again! Makes it a while lot more comfortable again for me. But at least one of them knows where the exit route is right?
Having a good day so far, slept well....it's the weekend so DH is around to play with the girls and hopefully do the groceries for us. We'll be in the house this morning as there is a tsunami alert at the moment (we live up a hill right on the coast) from the Japan earthquake and probably head down to the town in a few hours when we've got the all clear.
Oh I will try to take another belly shot this weekend! I'm down to single digits until 40 weeks! Woohoo...
DD3 & DD4 03/11
I think you're going to rock being a mommy of four. You seem like the kind of person who could definitely handle it. I'm not saying it'll be easy, but definitely doable. I know it's a completely different kind of thing, but I felt incredibly unprepared and inept when my son was diagnosed with autism. I thought he deserved a mommy who could do it much better than I ever could. But I grew into my new role and gained confidence over time. I mean, what other choice did I have.
You'll find your way.
Married to Mark 05.25.07
DD Stella Gabrielle - 12.31.07
DS Sebastien David - 01.06.09
DD Selene 'Lilu' Katherine Alice 03.16.11
Homebirthing, breastfeeding, attachment parenting momma
Hi, Jules. I'm glad you shared your fears.
One of my dearest IRL friends had twins. When she found out she cried. Literally. She did not want twins-- never imagined herself as the mum of 3 (she had a 2 yo at the time)-- and then when they were ID twin girls--OMG-- she was overwhelmed, not particularly happy and scared.
After the birth, I won't lie, she says that she barely remembers that first year (for better or worse?) but she was so so so busy and tired from nursing two babies and not sleeping and keeping up with her son....oy.
But now? They are beautiful five year olds and they can't imagine life any differently.
You are going to be amazing and I am thrilled for you. Just wish I was closer.....I'll fly over you in a few weeks....wish I could stop by
DD 8.03, DD 6.05, DS 3.07, DD 5.09, and DS arrived 6.17.12
I do completely get what you mean about Jesse's diagnosis and your changing expectations as a parent. I love the "Welcome to Holland" story and loved to read it again his/your journal. While I don't often work with children with autism (I'm a children's physiotherapist with particular interest in developmental work), except occasionally toe-walkers as with Jesse, I spend a lot of time with parents who have recently received diagnoses or who are coming to terms with developmental delays. Believe me, having read your journal, I would love it if the parents I work(ed) with put 50% of the effort and preparation that you have made to give Jesse everything he could need. You are an inspiration!
I hope that I can adjust as well to my changing expectations of "motherhood" as you appear to have
DD3 & DD4 03/11
Jimmy and myself have decided that our plan is simply to survive 2011 (as bad as that sounds), we are going to simply exist and keep smiling as much as possible. No other plans (other than a nightmare trip to the UK which we can't really get out of in August!) have been made and no expectations about anything else other than to come out the other side intact....
Don't know about amazing, I am hoping for being "good enough" - and TBH, I am really most looking forward to the chaos when they all start really interacting and we can return to activities such as camping and trips out as a family again. That's what I think I am most looking forward to - although I do REALLY want to meet these babies now!
Seriously, stopping by would be fantastic and you would be welcome anytime - maybe I'll do the same one day on a trip from Auckland to London?
DD3 & DD4 03/11