+++ Alicia's Birth Lodge! (alicia715) +++

67 posts / 0 new
Last post
Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852
+++ Alicia's Birth Lodge! (alicia715) +++

Happy 36 weeks!!! Welcome to your lodge!

amy

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Thanks, Amy!

I'll work on something today for an intro... hope you'll all be able to stand me - I tend to write novels!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

We are a captive audience - don't hold back!!! Smile

How does this pg compare to the pg with Justin? I know you've been through a lot of bureaucratic BS with healthcare, but are you feeling pretty good?

connorsmum's picture
Joined: 11/29/02
Posts: 1160

Yay!! Welcome to your lodge! I for one can't wait to read your intro, I love getting to know you all better!

DNesbitt's picture
Joined: 02/08/07
Posts: 166

Congrats on your lodge Alicia. I'm with you on the novel writing skills - I like you even more now :giveflower:

Joined: 04/20/05
Posts: 323

welcome to your lodge!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

OK, I'm going to split this up into two or three parts because I have a LOT to say Wink

Part I – A little background and why I want a NCB

I met my first husband way before we became involved. He was a friend of my live-in BF. The BF and I got together when I had just turned 18 and quickly became emotionally abusive. By the time I was 21, he had turned physically abusive and I was looking for a way out. Well, DH#1 had moved to Los Angeles around this time, and after a pretty bad evening with BF, I called and begged him to let me come stay with him until I could get on my feet. He knew what was going on and agreed. SO, off I went with $20, a plane ticket, and one small duffel bag in the middle of the night.

After a couple of months, DH#1 and I began to have feelings for each other and we got married. I got pg with DS a couple of years later. I didn’t have internet and was limited to reading the regular pg books. At 36 weeks, I was dilated 5-6cm and my OB did a sweep w/o my knowledge. That night, I had this stuff on the toilet paper and totally freaked out! :eek: I called the service and when she finally called back, she was laughing and told me she didn’t think I'd mind. I was mad, but figured this was just one of those “normal” things. A week later, my water broke. I called the OB, as she requested, to let her know that she should expect us at the hospital sometime that night or the next day. As I was on the phone, my contrax went from none to one on top of the next – they were so fast that it was impossible to time them. We ended up leaving for the hospital right then and by the time we got there (15-20 min.) I was fighting the urge to push.

No one believed that I was ready to push, so everything went really slow. My OB even asked me to wait to push until she did a c-sec on another patient! That wasn’t happening, so she strapped my legs into the damn stirrups and told me to push in a not-so-nice way. I hated feeling so helpless. I felt that I just had to sit up, squat, or something else. But I saw forceps and did not want those things inside me, so I just started pushing. After only three pushes, I had DS on my belly! The OB then proceeded to pull (hard) on the cord to get the placenta out so she could go do her c-sec. It hurt so badly, and my body was in shock from DS coming so fast. I ended up bleeding for 8 weeks. DS was perfect! He took to BFing easily and I had only mild discomfort from sore nipples and engorgement. Oh, and when I went back at 10 wks. Pp, my OB had moved to FL w/o any notice. Wonder what happened…

Fast-forward a year and a half… DH had this small sore on his head behind his left ear. It was very sensitive to the touch. As he had no insurance, he went to an urgent care and was told it looked like cancer and he needed to be seen by an MD for a biopsy. So, we paid out-of-pocket for an appt. DH had squamous cell carcinoma of the skin and, though it was a slow-moving cancer, it looked as if it had been there for a while. It needed to be removed right away. A simple office visit wouldn’t do it, as the cancer tends to embed itself, so he had to apply for Medicaid and find a hospital to take him. It took a year and a half!

VERY long, twisted story (I'll spare you the details). DH finally got the surgery by a plastic surgeon (no oncologist!) I had done my research and knew what should have been done in surgery and suspected that it wasn’t. DH felt really good again for about three months, when he began to have pain again. The Dr. told him that it was just from staples that had not been removed and took them out. The pain wouldn’t go away and the surgery site became infected and refused to heal. A year later, he was still in pain and the surgery site was a mess. Turns out the cancer had never been fully removed and was now growing into his skull. No one knew how to “fix” it this time. So, we moved to MI (just 45 min. north of where we originally lived) so he could be seen at U of M, where my stepmother had been an oncology nurse. They did the best they could to make him comfortable and even tried a few rounds of chemo to slow the cancer. On Sept. 7, 2005, he finally lost his battle. DS was able to say good-bye to his dad and has handled his death pretty well for such a little guy.

I was completely turned off by the medical establishment after my two major encounters with it – DS’s birth and DH’s cancer. I swore that if I ever had to deal with Drs again, I'd be well informed of everything – procedures, patients’ rights, etc.

"amy1673" wrote:

We are a captive audience - don't hold back!!! Smile

How does this pg compare to the pg with Justin? I know you've been through a lot of bureaucratic BS with healthcare, but are you feeling pretty good?

While it's been over 10 years, it's hard to say. I was working 8-10 hr. days waiting tables w/DS, so I'm not too bad this time around. I really have no complaints except for the usual back pain, heartburn, etc.

Oh, had my 36 week appt today. Saw the "good" OB. I let him check me one last time before labor and I'm 3-4cm. 70%eff. and LO is engaged and low (forgot to ask what station.:() He didn't think I'd make it to next week's appt., but we'll see. The longer LO bakes, the better! I'm betting my $$ on the 8th or 10th of Nov.

OK, back this afternoon with the rest of this epic tale and some pics.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

What a story. I'm so sorry to hear of your DH#1 passing and his terrible fight. I don't have a lot of faith in the medical establishment of America my self, and I hope you get a much better birth this time around. I look forward to following your story.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Part II - DH#2 - Woody and “Leonard”

Woody and I met similarly to how DH #1 and I met. He was a friend of DH #1. After his death, I was very alone. I was no longer on speaking terms with my mother and really had no friends, as I had focused on taking care of DH #1 since we moved to MI. Woody really helped me out by trying to get me to crawl out of my shell. He goaded me into going to parties of friends who knew DH #1, etc. After a while, we started dating – very slowly. Things progressed and we moved in together. By the end of last year, we decided to get married. So, on Leap Day this year, we “leapt.” We figure that about a week later, LO was conceived.

I have to break in here to say the DH is a great step-dad to DS. DS looks up to him and is comfortable talking with him about everything under the sun, including his impending puberty, girls, drugs, etc. And they both have the same twisted, sarcastic sense of humor, so hearing weird stuff around here is the norm!

All right… DH decided that as soon as our 20-week u/s revealed the sex of out LO, we’d find a name that we knew his parents would hate to call LO instead of “him” or “the baby.” So, he picked “Leonard.” DH’s mom absolutely hates it and FIL makes this hilarious face every time he hears it. LOL! DH told them that we wouldn’t be calling LO Leonard, but they just don’t believe him…

We had a slight scare of placenta previa around 17 weeks and more recently, there was concern about IUGR. The previa turned out to be a tech that wasn’t quite finished with her training – WHEW! And the u/s we had a few weeks ago showed that, while Leonard is small, he’s fine (and has lots of hair!)

I remembered reading Birth Without Violence when I was pg with DS and decided to check it out again a few months ago. I cried through the whole thing and memories of DS’s birth began to come back to me. I don’t know if I repressed them or if the shock to my body made everything fuzzy. He definitely didn’t have it easy. He got all the pokes & prods that are regularly done. I began to research all things birth-related in earnest and found that what I wanted was a NCB. Since then, I have felt more in control and informed than ever! I can’t wait to have Leonard in the best way possible for both him and me.

Most of you know that DH's dad has cancer - it's at stage IV and he's not likely going to make it past the new year. I had worried about DH being with his dad when I went into labor, as he opted to skip chemo, but he chose to do chemo until Leonard gets here so he can meet him and DH can feel more comfortable staying home with me rather than being torn between seeing his son born and saying good-bye to his dad.

If you made it to here – CONGRATS!!!

(Pics are gonna have to wait – I need a nap before it’s time to cook dinner.)

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Alicia, I'm so sorry to hear about DH#1. And what a traumatic experience with DS's birth. Big hugs.

Woody seems like a great guy. I just realized - you're going to be totally outnumbered in that house! Let the estrogen reign supreme!!

XY = 3, XX = 1

Smile

Jenn0113's picture
Joined: 03/09/07
Posts: 5335

WOW....great intro part 1 & 2. Its amazing how much we know each other from being online all day but then how much we don't really know each other at all.

I'm glad you shared.

MrsMangoBabe's picture
Joined: 04/09/07
Posts: 2276

Thanks for sharing your background. I'm sorry to hear about your DH#1 and I'm sorry you had a painful experience with the birth of your DS. I hope "Leonard" is able to come into the world in a more peaceful manner and a way that is respectful to you. Birth should be a celebration, not a violation.

Don't worry about what you write being too long. I have the same problem (if you don't believe me, you should see my DD's birth story). I'll read everything you write.

It sounds as if your lodge won't be around as long as some others since you went early with your first DS and you're already 3-4cm and 70%.

Good luck with your birth. I'll be rooting for you!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

"amy1673" wrote:

I just realized - you're going to be totally outnumbered in that house! Let the estrogen reign supreme!!

XY = 3, XX = 1

Smile

And DH has a DS (13) and even our two cats are males!
Right now, though, the pg hormones rule this place! I'm hoping that these guys are trained enough that I can stay on top of things after Leonard shows up!

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

What an amazing story. I'm sorry you've had such horrible experiences with the medical profession in the past. I have too. Leonards birth will be a much better experience.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Some pics:

2/29/08 DS Justin

DH & his cat, "Number 1"

MY Kitty, "Kee" (he's our "baby training" kitten. He gets into everything and we figure it's the way to get prepared for having a baby around!)

The day we got the positive pg. test

And today's belly pics (not very big, huh?)

newbeginnings's picture
Joined: 03/22/08
Posts: 153

Wow, what a story.... Thank you so much for sharing with us - I hope that "Leonard's" birth will be everything that you are wishing for....

I was so excited to see your lodge - I don't know why I thought you were farther along, so I couldn't figure out why it hadn't shown up yet LOL! Great belly, you are so tiny! Biggrin

Melychang's picture
Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 796

Great intro! I look forward to your birth story!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

OK, I keep having these really strange dreams that I think are telling me that LO isn't ready yet.

In them, Leonard's born, but doesn't breathe. I'm not alarmed, as his cord is still attached and pulsing. So, I wrap him up, planning to take him to the hospital so they can put him back in. Like this is something they do everyday. He's alert and smiling in the dreams. I'm wondering if he'll breathe or cry in the dreams when he's done baking...

Last night I woke up every 15 minutes to pee. Around 4:30am, a painful contrax woke me up :eek: I think that the every 15 minutes ones before that were BH as they always make me feel the urge to pee. I kept having painful and BH-type contrax until around 8am, then they finally went away and I got to sleep til noon (TY, DH!) SO, I'm thinking of sending these contrax to my buddy on Nov.... unless anyone on here would like them?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I don't want the contracions, but there are a couple gals around who would love them:) Your belly looks wonderful! I'm excited to see this birth play out for you, I think you'll do awesome. Thanks for shareing your pics, the day you got your bfp was beautiful I've never though to take a picture of the day. Now I just want to see a pic of you and DH's faces, and if you have one it'd be fun to see the outside of your house? You guys look like a happy family and I wish you all the best with upcomeing birth and the pending loss of a loved one, those are two big life changeing things and I'm sure the rest of this year will be very demanding for you of all.

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

Great pictures. You aren't very big, but a very beautiful baby belly.

keops's picture
Joined: 04/01/08
Posts: 813

Alicia !
Great story I read all of it and cry !!!!
I hope you have the birth you deserve.... I love your photos too...

I hope your contractions stopped and you are able to rest....

:bigarmhug:

newbeginnings's picture
Joined: 03/22/08
Posts: 153

So, anything exciting going on this evening?? Having any more contractions?

Is DS going trick-or-treating, or is he "too old" for that LOL?

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

"newbeginnings" wrote:

So, anything exciting going on this evening?? Having any more contractions?

Is DS going trick-or-treating, or is he "too old" for that LOL?

Yes, having lots of contrax. I think that I've come to terms with the distinct possibility that Leonard may show up sooner rather than later. Lots of plug this afternoon and evening. I'm not betting on anything actually happening, but I can tell that he's dropped even more.

DS went to my dad's this weekend. I have a niece (4y.o.) with Autism who just adores him. He decided to go trick-or-treating with her and "protect" her from all the scary stuff tonight. BUT, DH's son came up and we went out with him. Walked way more than I have in a long time. We went with some neighbors and I kept telling them to ditch me because I was stopping every 15 min. for a contrax. DH kept asking if it was "time" :rolleyes: all concerned looking. Now that I think back, I should have said "YES!!!" at least once. Woulda scared the s*** out of him (it is Halloween, right?! :evil:) HA!

OK, I have to lay down for a while - that was quite a walk!

sweetmonkey's picture
Joined: 10/01/08
Posts: 275

Wow. I read it all and it is a sad and beautiful story about love. I hope you get the natural peaceful child birth you are planning!

Here's hoping that tonight is the night!!!! Keep us posted. Biggrin

*Oh, I did not realize how far along you were! Maybe he is ready??? Here's hoping he will come when it is the right time!!!*

connorsmum's picture
Joined: 11/29/02
Posts: 1160

Sounds like you could be having your baby very soon, possibly even before me, lol! It won't be long until we will be holding these little ones in our arms.

newbeginnings's picture
Joined: 03/22/08
Posts: 153

Oh wow, sounds like your body really is gearing up!!! Hopefully Leonard will stay put as long as he needs to (but not TOO long lol)....

That's so sweet about your son wanting to go with your niece! Sounds like a fine young man. Smile And ROFL about telling DH it was time, that would have been hilarious!!!

How are you feeling this morning? (I am obviously not cleaning yet haha....)

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

It does sound like your getting very close. I hope he bakes just long enough and doesn't have any trouble when he comes. Let us know how your feeling when you can.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Back to normal BH contrax. There's lots of pressure and some cramps, but I think the cramps are more ligaments than anything else. (WHEW!) Did someone get those contrax I was having? Katie? Kerry? I'm hoping he'll stay put until Thursday (37 wks.) Poor DH has that day circled (complete with stickers, etc.) on the calendar as "DTD Day."

I'm taking classes online for a Bachelor's in Education and haven't been able to keep up with my assignments the last couple of days. Writing 1500 word papers on biology and child development just isn't easy when you can't even remember where you put the cereal you just bought! I've now got three papers that I have to turn in by tomorrow. And look what I'm doing - reading the pg.org boards!:rolleyes:

We called DS last night and he had a great time with my niece. She got scared by some bigger kids acouple of times, but she just ran to DS and he "protected" her. I'm really proud of him.:clappy: He chose to hang out with her over staying home and going trick-or-treating with a group of his friends. This would have been the first year he was allowed to go out on his own, too.

OK, off to read up on everyone else and then back to the grindstone. I'd actually rather clean the house some more over writing these :censored: papers!

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

"alicia715" wrote:

Yes, having lots of contrax. I think that I've come to terms with the distinct possibility that Leonard may show up sooner rather than later. Lots of plug this afternoon and evening. I'm not betting on anything actually happening, but I can tell that he's dropped even more.

DS went to my dad's this weekend. I have a niece (4y.o.) with Autism who just adores him. He decided to go trick-or-treating with her and "protect" her from all the scary stuff tonight. BUT, DH's son came up and we went out with him. Walked way more than I have in a long time. We went with some neighbors and I kept telling them to ditch me because I was stopping every 15 min. for a contrax. DH kept asking if it was "time" :rolleyes: all concerned looking. Now that I think back, I should have said "YES!!!" at least once. Woulda scared the s*** out of him (it is Halloween, right?! :evil:) HA!

OK, I have to lay down for a while - that was quite a walk!

Oh the thought of something happening soon. How exciting. I just wanted to say that my 3yo son is autistic. They are very special people. Waaaaay to smart though.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

"wishing4agirl" wrote:

I just wanted to say that my 3yo son is autistic. They are very special people. Waaaaay to smart though.

Tell me about it! I am glad that my DS sees this without anyone having to tell him. I don't know why, but I have always been interested in learning about autism, even before my niece. These kids are so very intelligent and too many people overlook that, only seeing what they want to see.

I have considered focusing my teaching degree on autistic kids, but 1) I think that I may have problems with getting too attached, and 2) schools tend to lump autistic children with LD students, creating a very bad environment for both groups. I think I would be too frustrated to do a good job.

MeesterMama's picture
Joined: 03/09/06
Posts: 296

WOW! Somehow I have not been here yet! Welcome to your lodge! Yahoo

I am sorry about your DH, reading that made me cry. I too would be turned off by medical personel after all that!

I would gladly take your contractions! I think you are going to have a baby before me! I can't believe you are already 3-4cm!!! I need to get some of this goodness! Lol

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

"alicia715" wrote:

Tell me about it! I am glad that my DS sees this without anyone having to tell him. I don't know why, but I have always been interested in learning about autism, even before my niece. These kids are so very intelligent and too many people overlook that, only seeing what they want to see.

I have considered focusing my teaching degree on autistic kids, but 1) I think that I may have problems with getting too attached, and 2) schools tend to lump autistic children with LD students, creating a very bad environment for both groups. I think I would be too frustrated to do a good job.

One of my son's teachers actually just put in her resignation. She has only been teaching there since last year but it seems very passionate for her. She resigned because our school district is more interested in putting money in their pockets than teaching our children. When things get cut that is the 1st to go. She is tired of these kids not getting the support and services they need and the school deeming them not important. I told her that I was sad to see her go, but was very touched and feel she is one of those teachers that most definitely does not make enough money because of the care and compassion she shows those kids. That is why I homeschool. My district is one of the worst in the state. If I didn't live in my district I wouldn't homeschool. I will even homeschool him. Luckily he is on the high functioning end so I am needing to get past the serious communication issues he has 1st which is why he is in the district. I just hope I can keep up with him.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome to your lodge! I read your intro's and I understand why you are turned off by the medical community! I would be too!

((ELVs)) I hope that Leonard makes his appearance when he is good and ready!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

How are you feeling today? I hope your little one stays put a little longer for you. Did you get the papers done? Your DS sounds like a great little guy, I bet your very proud of him! Your DH and his DTD day on the calender cracks me up, I hope you wait that long so he gets his day!

Mommas159's picture
Joined: 01/29/07
Posts: 107

I'm a bit late but welcome to your lodge. Your story is very moving. I certanly understand why you are going for a natural birth. I hope you get everything you want and need!
Will your DS be with you durring labor? Has he expressed intrest in being in the room when his sibling is born? I would bet that the two of you have a very strong bond since going through your DH #1's ordeal.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Back to normal BHs with a few painful ones every hour or so, so I think we're safe from having Leonard anytime soon (now that I have geared myself up for it.) I have been finding it really hard to concentrate on my schoolwork, but oh well. I do the best I can. I'm not even going to sweat the grades right now, which is very unlike me - I've carried a 4.0 until last semester when I dropped to 3.9.

DS is pretty iffy on whether he wants to be there when his little brother is born. He wants to but with him just starting to go through puberty and all, I think he's hesitant about seeing Mom's goods KWIM? The thing is, he may have no choice depending on the time we head to the hospital. I offered to let him be the "photographer" after Leonard is born and assured him that the rooms are big enough that he can be well away from the action if he wants. There is even a curtain that can be pullled to block his vision even more. I'm not someone who makes much noise during birth (at least I wasn't with DS) so he doesn't have to worry about that. But, I'll leave it up to him. The L&D staff seemed pretty cool about DS being allowed to go sit at their desk if he wanted.

I've felt like I have a major case of PMS today. Everyone and everything is getting on my nerves. I warned DH as soon as I woke up and he's been staying out of the way all day. I don't really know what's up with that, but I'm hoping it'll be gone tomorrow. I hate feeling like this!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Glad to hear things have slowed down for you, though he should be safe any time right? I can understand why your DS would be a little anxious about the birth, but it's great that he has all the options open and it's really up to him. Sorry about the PMS feelings, it's always fun to deal with extra emotions!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

OK, I was wrong. Having contrax 2 min. apart.Ouch! Gotta go...

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

Oh my I hope to hear good things soon.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I saw the news on the November BB!!!! CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Such a fast labor! I hope you had a great birth experience - I can't wait to hear the deets!

http://www.pregnancy.org/bulletinboards/showthread.php?t=429971

MrsMangoBabe's picture
Joined: 04/09/07
Posts: 2276

WOW! Oh my goodness, Alicia, congratulations! That was sudden and fast! I can't wait to read the whole story!

ourfirstblessing's picture
Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 1094

WOW Alicia, I just read your lodge. Thank you for sharing your intro and CONGRATS on the arrival of your newest LO, can't wait to hear details!

boilermaker's picture
Joined: 08/21/02
Posts: 1984

Wow-- congrats to you and dh. That is one fast labor!!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

WOW!! I'm glad my labors aren't that fast, I don't blame your DH for wanting to go when he did, and I'm sure you did an awesome job:) Can't wait to see the little tiny guy!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Hi! I'm new to one-handed typing, so bear with me...

I had an NCB - the hospital had no choice (heehee) and there wasn't even time for EFM. We ended up "officially" naming LO after dad and grandpa, with one exception - instead of using their middle name, we're keeping it an initial. We'll find a name that begins with "D" to call him. Right now, insteadd of calling him Leonard, DH &DS are calling him "NOT Leonard" - I'm jst calling him all the names moms always call thrie LOs (sweet pea, etc.) So, His official name is Gordon D. C_______.

BFing like an old pro. didn't even need help latching on!

oh! stats...
5lbs. 5.5 ozs
born 11/2 @ 11:39pm
19 1/4 " long
1 hour 39 min labor!!!!! NO tears, etc!!!!

Now, as soon as he lets me put him down for more than 30 sec :rolleyes: I'l write something up adn get these pics downloaded

I'll try to get pics and a story up ASAP.

mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302

omg! How the heck did I miss this one!:eek:

I dont think I even got to welcome you to your lodge!:ROFL:

Congrats to you mama!

Melychang's picture
Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 796

Congratulations! I can't wait for some pictures.

wishing4agirl's picture
Joined: 09/11/03
Posts: 917

Wow that was quick. Congratulations. Can't wait to read the whole story.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Alicia, I know you're busy and all, but we are jonesin' for a story and pics!!!! Wink Kidding...

The fastest labor EVER!! WOW!!!

COngrats again!
Amy

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

"amy1673" wrote:

The fastest labor EVER!! WOW!!!

Actually, DS was 45 min! This guy took more than twice as long - LOL!

Here are come pics:

I don't know if you can see his birthmark on his lower back. IRL, it looks like a heart:


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

AWWWWWWWWW!!! Look at that little fanny! Not to sound creepy, but there is nothing cuter than a baby butt! What a cutie, and a blondie??

You look great, Alicia - thanks for posting!!!

Pages