Heya, girls. It's been a very, very long few days, but as I sit here, watching my son sleep soundly in his swing, I'm so at peace. I want to share our story with you. It's definitely a story about miracles and prayers! Also, sorry for the camera phone pictures. I will get some (real) pictures up very soon. We're having camera issues. :( A little warning - there is some pretty squicky, scary stuff in here. Just remember, it has a happy ending!!
On Wednesday, August 8th, I went into the hospital to begin cervidil treatments. My mom got me settled and went home; no need for us both to be sitting there! They got me started and I began the long journey that was my birthing experience. I woke up very early on the ninth, in severe pain. My mom and my sister got to the hospital around 5.30 am. I got up, walked around a bit, took a shower, and they started my pitocin drip around 6 am. I almost immediately doubled over. It was SO painful!! When they checked me around 9 am, I was dilated to a four and having very regular, painful contractions. The baby was doing SPECTACULARLY, his heart rate was perfect, he was perfect. I, however, was in terrible amounts of pain. They offered to give me my epidural then, but not knowing how long labor would be, I really didn't want to already have it. I opted for some Nubane, which made me very loopy. I was sort of sleep-talking to my mom and sister. However, I finally got a break from the pain. I went to sleep. About an hour later, I was dilated to a five. The drugs were wearing off, and I was in intense pain. Mind you, I have a VERY high threshold for pain tolerance. I broke my hand and laughed. I was almost in tears. Finally, I consented to the epidural.
This is where it gets a little scary. The epi-guy came in almost immediately (I think after reading so many birth stories, I was scared it would take an hour for him to get there!), and got me all set up. I felt fine, if a little nervous, until all of a sudden I fell over. I could NOT hold myself up. And then the overwhelming headache. OMG, I cannot begin to tell you how it felt. I literally wanted to tear my brain out to make it stop hurting. I threw up several times (once all over my poor sister....). Finally, they moved my paralyzed body into a prone position. The epi-guy had missed, nicking the dura with his needle. My brain was flooded with spinal fluid. This is a semi-common occurance with spinal blocks, but VERY rare with epidurals. Because he missed, the epi-guy had given me a spinal, not an epidural. Not only that, an hour later, I was in screaming pain again, but unable to move a muscle to find a position to lessen it. It was terrible. I was dilated to a six for EIGHT HOURS this way, lying completely paralyzed in bed, sobbing and screaming. Fortunately, I was so out of it because of the headache, I don't remember most of this. What I do remember is that toward the end of the eighth hour, the doctor came in to tell me that I had two options. One, I could opt for a second epidural, so that I could rest and we could wait and see if I would dilate on my own, or two, they took the baby by c-section because he was starting to show signs of fetal distress. I asked which she thought was better, and she told me that because he'd done so well so far, that she thought we should wait and see if relaxing and resting would allow me to dilate.
So, after eight hours of this agony, they pulled the first epidural catheter and gave me a second epidural. I passed out. An hour later, the pain woke me up again. It turns out, epidurals just aren't my thing. They don't work. Also, the first one kind of turned me off of them forever. It was so terrifying. After having slept for an hour, the nurse checked me. I held my breath, terrified. She gave me a HUGE grin, a gigantic hug, and said "you're at an 8!! We're going to have this baby vaginally!!" I was soooo relieved. As she was washing her hands after checking me, I suddenly KNEW. I laughed and said, "uh, it's time." She looked at me and shook her head, telling me no, no way, I was too slow a progressor, that it was just some pressure. I insisted, and she checked me again. Turns out, I was right! (Duh, when will doctors learn that women know their own bodies?) She phoned the doctor, who took FOREVER to get there. I was trying soooo hard not to cry, the pain and pressure were so bad. But we did it!! The doctor ended up having to give me an episiotomy because Caden got stuck, but after 18 hours of intense back labor, two epidurals, 45 minutes of pushing, and an episitomy that required more stitches than I want to think about, Caden Matthew Alexander was born on August 9th, at 11:36 pm. He weighed 6 lbs, 15 oz, and was 20 inches long. Because I cannot hold him due to the pain and the drugs I'm on, we haven't been able to breast feed. I'm sad about that, but he's doing very well on formula. We have to go get a special hearing test done on his left ear, because he hasn't been able to pass a basic hearing test on it yet. Other than that, he is absolutely perfect. We are completely in love.
I'll post some real pictures when I get my camera situation sorted out, but here are a few camera phone pictures until then.
My monkey, just minutes after he was born :
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...key/Caden1.jpg
Just hanging out after the hospital photographer came in and took his pictures...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...key/Caden2.jpg
So tiny... and such a grip! He loves to hold your hands when you cuddle him :)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...key/Caden3.jpg