It is already Wednesday Down Under so that makes you 36 weeks on my time!
As one VBAC momma to another (I know you will do this!) I wanted to have the honour of starting your lodge! So welcome to your lodge my friend! This is the place to share all your hopes, dreams and even fears about the impending birth of your child. I look forward to sharing this journey with you and to supporting you to have the beautiful birth that you want!
Sarah (mum to Max & Billy)
Congrats on your lodge and GL on your VBAC!
Welcome to your lodge!
Congrats on your lodge, how exciting, you're getting closer and closer!!!
Mieka Claire 6-11-07 Henry Eli 3/30/09
Welcome! Can't wait to read your story.
Wow, I am truly honored to have a lodge here since I have been more of a responder and not an initial poster. Sarah--I appreciate you doing this. I have been on a long journey during this pregnancy in deciding have a VBAC and birth naturally...and many of you have helped in making this decision.
So a little bit about me...this is going to be long but telling you about my first birth will tell you how I got here....
I am 37 and have been married to my dh, Josh, 33 for almost 5 yrs. We met while living in Chicago and dh started medical school in Kansas City 3 years ago. We moved to Southern New Jersey last summer for him to complete is 3rd and 4th year rotations. It is challenging as he started medical school later and we have in a sense gone "back" but we know it will all be worth it in the end. We are blessed that he has primary care scholarship and will be a family practice or internal medicine physician.
I have one son, Max, who is 21 months today. He is a very active and talkative child and keeps me very busy
I work from home 4 longer days a week for a non-profit organization. Max goes to daycare those days b/c I have to work during specified hours. It works out pretty well b/c Max's daycare is within a mile. I do get lonely though not seeing people during the day and have a hard time having in Max in daycare.
I really wasn't informed enough when giving birth to Max. My dr in KC was big on inducing and I didn't think there was anything wrong with at the time. I knew a lot of people that were induced and did not have problems. She many times would say during my prenantal care that she doesn't let many of her patients go past 40 weeks (WHAT?) So, 2 days past my due date she said she was going to be on call the next day and I could be induced if I wanted. My cervix was closed tight and a little bit soft (not favorable for induction I know now)--so I admitted to the hopsital that night and had multiple cervical pills inserted over 12 hours and had to lay on my back the entire time so I didn't sleep. At about 7am the next morning, they started the pitocin...about 2 hours later the contractions were strong and I was tolerating them without medication but they were very close together and painful (1-2 mins apart) and at noon I was not even 1 cm and the dr decided to break my water. My 3pm I was only 1 cm and in a lot of pain, so dr said I could get an epi so I did... Shortly after Max's heartrate kept dropping, I don't necessarily think it was the epi b/c when they turned the pitocin off he was fine. So there were a couple of hours of turning the pitocin off and on when Max would go into distress. It was a horrible experience--I was tired and worried...so they checked me one last time, I was only 1 cm. So, at this point Max didn't look like he would tolerate any more induced labor so we decided on c-sec which was the best decision at the time. The c-sec itself wasn't too bad it was me being so tired and when the epi was turned-up it made me shake and feel "out of it" that was hard. I actually dosed off while they were stitching me up. Max was limp when he came out and apgardes were only 5 but was doing better within a 1/2 hour. Dh went with him which I wanted and well, I was sleeping guess any way. One thing I didn't like while having c-sec is dh stood the entire time and watched and didn't really support me (it is the medical student in him)--I know it would have been different had we given birth vaginally.
The put me in a room to recover and dh kept running back to tell me how he was doing and said he wanted to bf but I continued to dose off and was barely able to talk. (During this time my mom and brother were in the room with me which was nice, I know they were really worried). Within an hour I was able to funtion better and they brought Max in so I got to hold him and was able nurse him a little. Max was born around 10pm and we were brought to the room I would stay in for 3 days around 12:30am. We sent Max to nursery for 3 hours since I could not even keep my eyes open and I litterally was not able to handle him.
So, if that all wasn't bad enough I think I have one of the worst c-sec recovery stories I have heard. In the hospital the dr said they were having trouble with the staples lately and she wanted to keep them in longer. So, I went to her office a week later to get them removed and while the nurse tech removed them (which is routine) my incision opened up and there was blood every where. She was freaking out pushing the nurse button as I lay there. OMG, I could not believe what was happening. The dr came in and had to stitch me up again and my poor mom was out in the waiting room with Max when the receptionist came out and said that my dr had to cancel all her apts since she had an emergency--my mom knew it was me.
During the following weeks I leaked a lot of fluid from incision and I just knew something was not right. I went in at about 4 wks b/c I thought I had a breast infection and I asked the nurse prac. to look at my incision. She pressed on it and fluid squirted up in the air and she cultured it. I had two bad hospital infections (can't remember the names) and part of my incision was not healing. In the days I was waiting for the culture to come back, the dr had me go to the wound clinic to have my incision packed and dealt with. During my first wound clinic visit they called my ob about the results of the culture and the ER dr at the wound clinic said I was not going home and being admitted, I needed IV antiobiotics immediately. Max was about 5 wks old and OMG this was just nuts. I was admitted and they put me in a new room that had only a couple of patients in it before me on med/surg floor since I had to have Max with me since I was bfing and he wouldn't take a bottle. (a hospital is not a good place for a newborn...)
So, then we had to deal with what antiobiotics I could take with bfing--the entire situation was so scary and hard...we had to make the better of two evil decisions... My OB wasn't doing a very good job of managing my after care either, in fact no one was really managing it.... I was in the hospital for 5 days and was given a pic line and sent home on home healthcare. I had two more weeks of IV anibiotics, 3 hrs a night that my dh administred and I had a nurse who came to pack my wound. Oh yea and I was taking care of a newborn and my dh was in his hardest section of med school (neurology)...to say we were challenged was an understatement.
The infection cleared up but my incision took 4 months to heal with weekly visits to a wound clinic.
Now to this wonderful pregnancy--surprise, we got pregnant on a day we didn't think it would happen. We are blessed to be very fertile, hehe! I am not sure how I first heard of having a VBAC but after my experience I defintely wanted to learn more about it. My biggest fears have always been rupturing and my dh had many fears.
At one point in my pregnancy I thought I would try VBAC, then I decided I wouldn't take any chances and have a repeat c-sec and recently decided I AM GOING TO HAVE A VBAC and dh is getting on board. I also have been lurking on this board for a while and would like to have a NCB. Dh is a bit worried about seeing me in pain but I think that is normal--although I went many hours without medication with Max and he just read medical magazines, I think he will be fine.
Sorry this is so long but as you can see this has been a long journey but I am so happy that I am here and this lodge is making me feel empowered and I am so happy to have all of your support over the next month. Any advice you can give is greatly appreciated.
On a special note, Sarah (fostersm) and I found each other shortly after our sons were born b/c we were part of the Sep 05 and Aug 05 boards and we both have Maxs. We have always kept in touch in some way and found each other again here and now she had her VBAC and is supporting me in mine.
Mommy to Max (8/23/05) and Gracie (6/22/07)