Carla's (saffronelephant) lodge!!

**Coffeegirljones** · 08-30-2006, 02:06 AM

WOW! I can hardly believe that it's almost time to meet your baby surprise!

You have been such a great support to me and I am honored to start your lodge, my friend. And the Snackster says 'Gooo baba meoooma!' which I took as celebratory

Congrats and welcome! Tell all!

**Chimmy** · 08-30-2006, 02:31 AM

Welcome to your lodge!!!

I can't wait to hear how your birthing goes

selkiemom · 08-30-2006, 07:00 AM

Congrats on making it this far! How are you doing?

**saffronelephant** · 08-30-2006, 08:43 AM

Wow. Like Lisa, (luckyme2n2), I cried when I saw my name attached to a lodge. Thanks, Marissa, for starting my lodge; you were my first friend on pg.org and I am honored.

This is really happening isn't it?! The immediate response to how I am doing is that I am exhausted this morning. Sleep is eluding me more and more...between my racing mind and my aching hips I spent the night going back and forth between the bed and the couch. Then, to top it all off this morning, the construction site across the street starting cutting, yes cutting, concrete at 7am. Oh well.

I'll follow other moms leads and tell you a little about myself. I am 37 and my DH is 43. We eloped just this last July and have known each other for a little over a year. Some would say "so fast", but when I knew, I knew and he did, too. And, in my experience, time doesn't always mean much. I met my ex-husband when I was 21, we were friends for a year, dated for a year, lived together for 5 years, were engaged for one year, married, and divorced less than 2 years later. Lots of time involved there, but I ignored the problems for years and just kept going with him. He was (and is for all I know) an alcoholic and our separation was instigated by him telling me that he decided he didn't want to have children. Having children was a non-negotiable for me. When everyone else always knew what they wanted to be when they grew up, I wanted to be a mommy. (Ironically, my ex-husband is now re-married with a 2 year old.) So, I grieved and got angry and cried and wailed at the world and said "why me" and was generally very angry that I was getting close to 35 and I had wanted all my children in my 20s. After turning 35, I went down the road of artifical insemination (AI) and SMC...Single Motherhood by Choice. I went through the counseling, etc., got approved, and did one round of AI and never went back (and didn't get pregnant). It hit me like a ton of bricks...I not only wanted children, I wanted a family unit. A year later I met Michael, my DH, and on date #2 early last fall we discussed that we weren't "messing" around and that we both wanted a family. His most recent relationship was with a woman with 2 teenage daughters and he was Mr. Mom and adored those children...then one day, his girlfriend stopped coming home and did this several times over several months...she had become a cocaine addict. It broke his heart, but he finally made the decision after helping to get her into treatment to walk away from those girls that had become like his own and end the relationship. At that point, he was at a similar low point to mine and figured he was never going to have a family of his own. So, on January 4 of this year while out celebrating DH's birthday we discussed trying to get pregnant this year, probably this fall (I mean neither of us was getting any younger!)...I got pregnant that night!!!!

My pregnancy has been non-eventful...especially for an AMA pregnancy! LOL I feel absolutely blessed and that this child and my DH are gifts in so many ways. Well, I think that is more than enough history. Thanks, ladies, for being such a supportive group and I look forward to learning from each of you! I'll tell you about why I want a natural childbirth, etc. in another post. I hope you're all doing well!!!!

selkiemom · 08-30-2006, 11:17 AM

Carla, it is odd the twists that life sends our way, but somehow it seems we are meant to have each of these experiences no matter how tough they are. What a blessing that you are where you are right now. You already know it, but you are on the precipice of a life-defining event.

We are all here to cheer you on!

ahanson74 · 08-30-2006, 01:08 PM

Congrats on your lodge Carla!! I was so excited to see it here today. TFS about your past history. I can imagine the road has been difficult, but look where you are now! I'm SO happy for you!