Thread: Fawn's (fawn) Lodge! - postpartum

Ok, I've been dying to have a lodge, can I start one myself or what?!

Well, I don't see why not! - but if yo're afraind to break tradition I can start one for you!

I'm not even sure what I "do" at my lodge, but I enjoy reading other lodges and always thought 36 weeks seemed soooo far away that I'd never ever get there to get one........

Fawn, tell us about yourself and your pregnancy so far!

I was soooooo excited to get one too. I totally asked for mine. LOL Glad to see I'm not alone!!!

Welcome to your lodge!

If this is going to be your lodge, then could a Mod or someone change the title? If not, Hell, I'll start a new thread that can be the lodge.

Congratulations on 36wks!

I think it's fun when someone else starts it, but I also know that with so many of us we get behind in starting them

Ayla do you want to go ahead and start one for her?

Originally Posted by chimmy

I think it's fun when someone else starts it, but I also know that with so many of us we get behind in starting them

Ayla do you want to go ahead and start one for her?

rock on.

Yay! a lodge of my own!!! This is a little long, sorry

Alright, I'll start back in Sept. of last year........... my DH and got married Sept. 30th, 2006. Five days before the "big" day, I decide, on a whim, to take a pregnancy test because my period was being wierd, lots of brown spotting, but it wasn't progressing to the real thing. Lo and behold, there was a faint line there that would indicate I was pregnant........ I did not believe it at all, as I was sure I could not be pregnant So I took 4 more tests after tha,t using the same brand and one other brand, and yep, it kept saying pregnant! I had thought about all these cute ways to tell DH when/if I ever got pregnant, but in the end, I just ended up calling him at work and blurting out that I had taken a pregnancy test and it had come up positive. I remember all he kept saying was "Oh wow, oh wow", he was in shock

A little background.......... I'm 34 and hubby is 35, so we had decided to start trying for a baby in June/July of last year, as we were getting married in Sept. anyways, so I would be able to wear my dress, etc. with no problem if I did get pregnant. We never really thought it would happen quite so quickly, we had both envisioned and looked forward to months of "trying", so we were both really surprised.

Go back 5 years, and I was in another relationship with a guy who was not the greatest (which is an understatement) and I was pregnant. Around 6 weeks I started spotting and lost the baby Christmas day; I was devestated. After a couple painful months of me crying a lot and being depressed, the boyfriend/dad decided to just "check-out" of the relationship and dealt with it all by snorting cocaine, drinking and cheating I eventually let go of him and decided he was only making me more of a wreck and continued to deal with the loss on my own.

Fast forward to our honeymoon and I'm still spotting......... we decide to go to the Dr. and see if they can tell us anything. Of course I want her to tell me everything will be ok, that it's not a m/c happening all over again, but of course they can't really tell me anything for certain, just that some women spot and they never know why. I spotted from week 4 through week 9 of my pregnancy! I was an emotional wreck during that time (DH will verify this ). I would tell my DH I was sure I had lost the baby and not to get his hopes up, sometimes waking him up at 1am and crying I would inform him of this. I probably did this a half dozen times......... and all these old feelings kept resurfacing. Would DH stop loving me and leave me if I lost the baby? I know they were irrational thoughts now, but at the time it was hard to convince me otherwise.

When we came back from the honeymoon, I called a local OB who wanted to see me ASAP, which worried me, but gave me some relief that maybe he could tell me more. They did an U/S and saw a tiny little sac with a tiny little baby in it, along with a yolk sac at 6 weeks, I was relieved somewhat. I went in weekly as I kept spotting and they did U/S each time. Baby was implanted in a good spot and they had no clue as to why I kept spotting. I took it day by day, hoping to get further along than the last m/c, hoping to not see the worst on the U/S screen each week. I was totally detached from this baby, not wanting to feel the pain like I did the last time, if we should lose it, wanting to protect myself. We passed milestones, hearing the heartbeating was a big one At some point I started to believe I might actually get a baby out of this As the pregnancy progressed, I started to think about actually having the baby and what I would want for the birth. I had looked into using Hypnobabies for birthing and had brought it up to my OB. He had never heard of it, but assured me he would support me however I wanted. He kept making little comments however, that told me otherwise, and I got the feeling that he was not really a supporter of natural birthing after all, which was my goal. At 30 weeks I decided to switch from my OB to midwife care. After meeting with them, I was so glad I had switched! The appointment had a completely different flavor to it than my OB appointments had. I left feeling more in control of my pregnancy and thinking I actually could birth this baby the way I wanted to.

So through lots of reading, the great advice and info on this board and the support of my wonderful hubby, here I am today, finally at 36 weeks, waiting to welcome our little girl into the world whenever she's ready to make her appearance