Mary's Lodge! (merita0511)

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Mary's Lodge! (merita0511)

Hey, this is late, but if anyone needs a lodge, it's you, girlfriend! Keep us posted on how things are going with your VBAC fight. :woohoo:

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Yes, ma'am! I knew it'd show up sometime!

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Congratulations! I can't wait to hear all about your VBAC!

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Welcome to your lodge!! :wavehello:

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Thanks you guys! I am still feeling great...no contractions or anything. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that he hasn't dropped yet. I went to my prenatal yoga class yesterday and we did a lot of different squatting moves so hopefully that gets him moving down. Besides that I am just walking on a daily basis. I will keep you guys updated Biggrin . Mary

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Welcome to your lodge! I can't wait to read your birth story!

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congrats on your lodge!

what are your birthing plans? tell us more about yourself if you feel comfortable doing so.

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I guess I should tell you guys more about myself. So I am 28 y.o. SAHM to 2.5 y.o DS. My DH is also 28 and is a surgical resident (kind of funny how we will be doing a natural birth). Before I had my son I was a labor and delivery nurse (even funnier) and yes I was all into medical intervention and getting the babies out ASAP until I had my ds. My ds was taken via c-section at 36 weeks due to pre-eclampsia. I really should have been induced to try for vaginal delivery but being a first time mommy and "trusting" my doctor I went with the c-section b/c the doc told my dh and I that the induction would never work. I had a horrible recovery from my c/s including infection and being allergic to the sutures. My incision was still draining after 8 weeks. My ds also suffered from respiratory problems after birth, was colicy, and had pretty severe reflux. I due blame the fact that he was taken at 36 weeks via c/s for alot of his problems. After my experience I knew that I wanted a VBAC and wanted a natural childbirth. I started informing myself, hired a doula, doing prenatal yoga, and getting lots of info. from this board also Biggrin . My dh is very supportive of my wants and desires and thankfully has not fought me on any part of my journey. My whole family is rooting for me since I will be the first person since my grandmother to deliver vaginally. My mother had 3 c/s (first b/c of pre-eclampsia and never allowed her to try vaginally after that), and my sister 3 c/s (same reason as my mom). I am so excited to finally be able to feel a contraction (which I never did with my ds) and feel like a woman experiencing labor. I think this has become a book...lol. Well, that is my story and I will definitely keep you guys updated as my due date is approaching and I still haven't felt any type of contraction or braxton hicks (hopefully soon). Mary

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That is so nice that you have support in your family. It must be giving you strength, to fight for your VBAC.

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Congrats Mary! I think it's fantastic that you are planning a VBAC despite the careers you and your husband have/had. That's great that you educated yourself and have made positive steps toward experiencing the birth you want.

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So still feeling well here but was wondering what does your mucous plug look like? Is it clear or does it have to be blood tinged or pink? Just wondering b/c I have been having clear snot like discharge and then today I had a more cream colored discharge but didn't know if that was the start of my mucous plug. I hope my cervix is starting to do something. Ok...off to go walking. Mary

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Welcome to your lodge! I look forward to hearing about your VBAC journey. I'm rooting for you!

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OH THE PRESSURE :shock: !!! This baby definitely dropped and all I feel is pressure. I am not complaining by any means but I just feel that he is going to fall out (wishful thinking Wink ). We shall see what my cervix is doing on Thurs. It is so weird but I feel like I am training for a marathon....I am walking every day, drinking over 4 liters a water a day, drinking my red rasberry leaf tea 2x a day, and sitting on my exercise ball to maintain good posture and hopefully continue moving this baby down. If anything changes or anything new happens I will let you guys know.
Mary

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Good for you with drinking 4 litres of water! That is incredible, I am struggling with getting 2 down! So your baby has dropped! How exciting! I am looking forward to when your baby comes! It could be soon!

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Good show! Your statement about the baby falling out and that being wishful thinking made me giggle Smile

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Wow, congrats on drinking all that water! I have trouble getting all of my water in.

I hope everything keeps going well.

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Don't forget to tell us how it went with the OB and the induction debate. Can't wait to hear your update!

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Update from my appt. on Thurs. So here I was going to this appt. thinking that the only battle I was going to have to fight was passing my due date without scheduling a c-section but once again this office surprises me and catches me off guard. So I go into my appt. pretty relaxed and b/p is good. I am sitting in the room with my dh waiting for the doc and I specifically tell dh that I want to go till 42 weeks. The doc comes in with such a major attitude. I think the docs are pretty much tired of me and she was going off on me about not going to the hospital last week and how it is on me and that I am a grown woman and I am putting my babies life at risk....blah, blah, blah crap. What she was saying did not bother me one bit b/c it was going in one ear and out the other it was in the manner that she was speaking to me in. I thought to myself "I can't believe she is being this nasty...and I am paying for them to deliver my baby!". So then she goes on to check me and tells me that the cervix is still very high, not effaced at all and I am only a fingertip dilated. I told her that was good since he just turned head down a week and a half ago or so. She tells me that she can't confirm that he is head down and starts feeling on my belly and tells me he is breech. I seriously thought that I was losing my mind b/c I had not felt him flip again. She tells me that we will go ahead and confirm it with a sono and schedule a c/s for early next week b/c they don't schedule c/s on Fri. (how convenient for them). We go have the sono and at this point I am a total wreck. I am crying in disbelief that my battle is over and I am going to have another c/s. SHe puts the wand on and ....

HE IS HEAD DOWN!!!! I don't know why I even believed her. I am so mad that I didn't trust my baby. So now I am thinking yay no battle to fight this week. We go back into the exam room to go over the sono and she is completely shocked that he was head down....moron. Then she throws another loop on me..."you are 40 weeks next week so we need to go ahead and schedule for next week b/c we don't let vbacs pass their due dates b/c of the increased risk". I very nicely asked her what am I at an increased risk for that a first time vaginal birth is not? She looks surprised that I have questioned her and starts getting a really nasty attitude stating that my baby is at an increased risk for meconium...I respond that any baby passing post term dates is at an increased risk for meconium. Then she tells me not to forget about uterine rupture...I replied to go on to the next risk factor. Then she tells me the biggest lie I have ever heard of....she says that vbac babies are at an increased risk for fetal distress during labor and that they "sense" the scar from the c/s and then they have their bm and that is when all the problems can come to effect. At this point I am just abgry that sh is BSing me and I let her know that a mom in my son's playgroup just attempted a vbac with them and they allowed her to go to 41 weeks. She says that is very rare but if I want to put myself and the baby at risk she will allo me to go to 41 weeks not passed that and we would need to schedule the c-section for 41 weeks. I was ready to battle it out to 42 weeks but instead my dh came out of nowhere and told her that it was fine and we would schedule the c/sfor 41 weeks. I can't tell you how upset and disappointed I was in my dh. I just kept staring at him in disbelief that instead of supporting me he took her side. So as of now I have a c/s on the 28th (which I will not be shwing up for). I let my dh know that he acted like a doctor iwth me not my husband and I stopped talking to him after that appt. He tells me what if she is right...I let him know to do his research find where what she said is true and I will have the c/s on the 28th. So my dh has promised me that if he cannot find that info anywhere (which I know he won't) he will call her and cancel the c/s. If you read thi far thank you for taking the time to read my drama and battle for my natural vbac and I will contiue to fight for my right as a women. I will keep you guys updated. Mary

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Hey, good luck in your battle for the birth you want. I'm sorry your DH is not being more supportive. Just b/c you scheduled that doesn't mean you have to show up! Maybe it can placate the morons a bit and get you some breathing room in the meantime. I hope you get to enjoy the experience of being a birthing woman!

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Good for you - to have the strength to question your doc. So many women don't have that strength or education.

I'm sorry your DH wasn't more supportive, but perhaps he is just worried about you and the baby?

Keep fighting, mama. I can't wait to come here and read your VBAC birth story! :bighug:

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Hugs, Mary! That is awful! What a stupid wench for lying and using scare tactics. I definetly would wait as long as possible before going to the hospital. You don't want that mentality when you are in labor. You can do do it!!!! I am proud of you for being so strong! You are very dedicated to having your VBAC. You are paving the way for other women to have VBACS.
Lots of love,
Cyn

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Mary, I'm so proud of you for standing your ground, both with your doctor and with your husband. A woman I know did VBAC at home UC in her bathtub, and I believe she was post dates and her son was HUGE. Do whatever you need to do. Screw the establishment.

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As far as I can find, the only 'increased risk' of letting a VBAC baby go past dats is that they will be slightly bigger at birth which may or may not increase the chances of a uterine rupture. But even that concern is negligible, I think you are 100% right for standing your ground.

I also think that her BS simply frightened your hubby and that his own research will reassure him better than anything you could say.

Stef

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I'm so sorry your doctor is a scalpel happy idiot! And that your dh wasn't more supportive of you- I guess he was maybe just scared by what the doctor said? Hopefully you will have your baby soon, in the way you want to give birth. Good luck to you!

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Oh, my, I'm so sorry your doctor tried that on you. Hopefully once your dh sees that she is wrong, he will be able to support you better. I aggree with pp, I think you should keep that appt, just so the doctors stay off your back. It doesn't man you have to go. And maybe your sweet babe will decide to come out before then anyway, and your doc wasted all that effort to scare you and dh for nothing! Smile

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So proud of you Mary! I feel bad for you for your husband's reaction - but I really thing he thought he was working in the best interest of you and your baby. He wants you to be okay and everyone to be safe, and obviously your doctor got to him. You hang in there.

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Oh Mary, my heart and hugs go out to you--I more recently started coming on this board so I had not heard your story before. I had a c-sec because of a failed induction (and of course which I was not induced now) and now dilated past 1 cm after 12 hrs of cervical pill and 12 hrs of pitocin and then baby had problems. Well, the part that is similar to yours is--when the staples were taken out of my incision a week later, it opened and had to re-stiched--5 wks past birth I had a horrible infection and was in the hospital for a week and took 3 hours of IVs at home for 2 weeks after that and my incision took 4 1/2 months to heal after many visits to a wound clinic--I share all of this to say reading your story of your first birth put me in tears.

My dh is also in his 3rd yr of med school and many times I just want him to be my husband just like you said.

That OB sucks, I cannot believe they won't let you schedule your c-sec for when you want. I got to a large practice in southern jersey and I was told in my attempt to have a VBAC, I can schedule my c-sec for whenever I want which I am aiming for 42 weeks. Is it about liability with yours? Is there something you can sign to say you understand the risks, since they don't--ugh, girl I am praying for you and am here for you.

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Mary-
So sorry you are going through this...it sounds like you handled both your doc and your DH perfectly! What composure you showed by being able to question the doc's "information" and assert your knowledge! What a great response to your DH to "do his research!" You should be very proud of yourself!

Keeping fingers crossed that all goes your way!

Jen

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HI gals,

Thank you so much for your kind words...this is why I love this bopard so much.....there is so much support. Well, to update my dh has been doing research and cannot find anything to what the doc had stated....DUH! So he feels a lot more comfortable about going to 42 weeks. I on the other hand am finally starting to feel miserable. I have so much pressure and pain down there. I really do hope that this baby comes sooner than later so that I don't have to deal with the doc's office much longer. I am starting to have menstrual like cramps and clear discharge btu am unsure if that would help my cervix to thin out or not. I don't have the slightest clue what a contraction feels like but am hoping the menstrual like cramping is something.

brandi26,
I am going to fight till the very end. The doc made it seem like they weren't willing to budge past 41 weeks but we will see about that. Your story gave me goose bumps...I am so sorry that yuo had to go through that. I really do feel your pain.

Well, I am hoping things will continue moving along and I will keep you guys updated.
Mary

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**LURKER**

I have to say that your story gives me so much hope and strength in my own choice! Im Attempting a vbac after 2 c/sections and Face all those "reasons" at my last appointment! I will be watching your lodge with great interest! Wishing you all the best and smooth and uneventful VBAC vibes!!!! Good On you for standing by your choice!!

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Hi Mary -

I just wanted to say that I can't wait to hear your VBAC birth story. I am so in awe of how hard you are fighting and impressed with you for standing your ground. Awesome!

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Mary--just want you to know you are in my thoughts an prayers today.

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Mary, I just wanted you to know how much I am rooting for you. I hope I can be as strong with my VBAC if I have to. I have a friend who recently signed out AMA because they wanted to section her at 41wks, with a bogus BPP (said baby was big and low amniotic fluid) a u/s the next day said her fluid level was fine and the baby was 7lb 15oz at birth. They cannot force you to have a c-section nor can they refuse to treat you (they have to give you 30 days notice). You basically have to sign AMA, and you will have some hostility around it.

I hope you have no more problems and that baby comes soon.

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Sounds promising Mary! Do you have someone to contact us when you go into labor? I'm getting so excited for you!!!!

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Thanks everyone for your thoughts and prayers...keep them coming. I promise to let you guys know when I go into labor especially since I am staying home as long as possible. The office called me to give me the info about the c/s next. wed. I haven't called them back yet but I am going to pretend like I am listening and cooperating just so they stay off my back and then next Tues. my dh is calling the office to cancel the c/s. We are armed and ready in case they want to discharge me from the practice with all the legal crap about discharging me. I rarely check in with my birth board anymore because it seems that most of the gals over there have had their babies and are talking about the babies while there are still a few of us around that still haven't delivered. I don't know how any of the other march mommas feel but it just feels akward to me that they are all rushing to have an induction or c/s just to get the baby out...I really don't feel that I can relate to them at all since I am fighting to keep this baby in. Well, I have been talking to my baby boy letting him know that as much as mommy is enjoying him inside her belly, he really needs to think about when he wants to come out because there are docs trying to get him out and mommy is fighting for him. Ok I am going to go for a walk Biggrin Mary

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Mary--good to hear from you and glad you all have a plan in place--I am sending some labor vibes your way!!! Keep us updated!

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Hey Mary. Cyn let me know you were posting over here so I thought I'd see what was going on. I'm thinking about you and can't wait to hear your birth story. You are a strong woman and I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself.

You can do it!

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Good luck Mary. I hope your baby boy makes his entrance in the next few days!

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Hmmm, Mary's not been around since Wednesday. Maybe that's a good sign!

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Mary, how are you? KUP when you can!

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Hi Gals,

Check in time and get ready for a new episode to my soap opera or nightmare (not quite sure which one it is right now). I had a doc appt. today and I knew that I would be getting a NST and this was also going to be my preop for my c/s that is scheduled Wed. (no I am not having it done just letting them think that I am cooperating Biggrin ). So I go and I wait 30mins. in the waiting room nefore they start the NST and at this point I am annoyed b/c it is the baby's "naptime". So of course they pump me up with juice to get him going and he does pretty good but you can tell that he is sleeping. So after an hour of NST (yes an hour :roll:) my Mom went and got the nurse and asked her if we were done with this or not. The nurse came took me off the monitor and put me in the room to wait for the doc to check me. I had been looking at the strip all along and I knew that everything looked good except for one variable decel at the end of an hour....I figured no big deal. She comes in and checks me...I am now 1cm (I was only a fingertip last week) and my cervix is definitely alot lower (she can feel his head now) I am so excited! Then she tells me about the NST and she doesn't feel comfortable letting me go home b/c of the one decel and she wants me to go o the hospital for a BPP. I agree with her...I am more than happy to do so and make sure that the baby is still happy. I drop off my ds with a friend and while there I print out everything I can about BPP so that I can be informed so that they cannot BS me on the results. I went to eat and then my Mom and I headed to the hospital. BTW...I didn't leave the docs office till 4:30 :twisted: . We get to the hospital they start the NST and I wait for the songrapher to come do the BPP. I am on the NST for an hour and a half when finally the doc that is on-call comes in and tells me that I had one variable decel since being at the hospital and if anything on the bpp is abnormal they will do the c/s tonight b/c they don't let anything slide since I am 40w 3d. I agree with her....if the baby is no longer happy....get him out. The sonographer does the test and my boy scores 8/8...perfect score! I knew he was fine! I go to the bathroom start getting everything ready to go (it is now 8:30 at night) when the nurse comes in and tells me that I am not leaving yet that she has to put me back on the nst. I ask her for what if I passed the BPP. She tells me that the doc that was here didn't give her discharge papers and there is now a new doc on call and she needs to page her to see what she wants to do. At this point I am furious!!!! I tell her to get her on the phone now b/c I am leaving. She brings me the phone with the doc that is on-call and she tells me that she wants to continue monitoring me b/c of the one decel I had at the hospital. I tell her that per my research if the patient passes the bpp they no longer even look at the nst strip. She tells me "well I do". She goes on to telll me that she wants me to stay that night continuing to be monitored and I could possible have a c/s tonight or tomorrow"...HUH? She goes on to tell me that she would love to give me my baby tonight (this is where I lost it completely) I told her I didn't want my son delivered tonight by c/s over one decel when he passed his bpp and that I needed to call my husband b/c I was leaving AMA. She then tells me that she can't let me do that especially since I am 40w 3d and I can go home and the baby could die tonight. I gave the phone back to the nurse at this point told her to get me off the monitor and to bring me the AMA form. I signed the AMA form and left. I can tell you guys that I am done with this office. The bpp is good for one week so I know the baby is fine till next Fri. and if anything were to occur from now until the babies delivery I am just going to the hospital and not dealing with this office anymore. They have absolutely no respect for women or their bodies. I guess they expect every women to be a completely idiot and not do research about the different tests or different outcomes. I knew today that once I went to the hospital I was going to have to leave AMA or I was going to have a c/s. I don't feel one bit upset or stressed out about my decision...I know that I made the right one for my son and I and I will continue to fight for my right as a women, a mother, and for my unborn child. If you read all of this thank you (I actually just got home from the hospital) and I will keep you guys updated. If you can please send thoughts and prayers my way that my baby boy come soon. Biggrin Thanks, Mary

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:kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3: :kaos3:
Here is your own cheer squad right here, Love. I am rooting for you all the way!

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Mary, you are seriously my hero!! Good for you for standing your ground and dropping the (edited for cursing) office!

Stef

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Good for you.... It is always hard to stand up for what you believe in especially once they start the "your baby could die" speech.
I hope I have half your guts when time comes should something similar happend to me.

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Oh . . . mama. You're so strong. I'm watching your journey and cursing myself because I know I was too weak with my first birth experience. I am anxiously awaiting your incredibly successful VBAC experience - and, truth be told, I'm looking forward to you thumbing your nose at the naysayers. I know that's not always the best attitude to take, but in your case . . . I think it's warranted.

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Wow, you make all of the VBAC hopefuls so proud! You are so strong. I am glad you stood your ground, they are so horrible!
:kaos16:

My wish is that I ca be half as strong as you when my time comes. WTG!

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Mary hon you ROCK.

I've just caught up with your lodge and wanted to chime in with my support. You are a strong and inspiring mama and all these medical folk need to encounter more mamas like you.

Lots of hugs & support
xo Robin

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Just thought I would update you guys that at 3:30 am I woke up with what I thought were constipation cramps. Well after attempting to go to the bathroom and nothing came out I went and laid back down. I couldn't go back to sleep and I started wondering if this was constipation or contractions. They were starting to get worse and the pressure down below was crazy. I finally called my doula at 4:30am and told her and she told me that they were pre labor contractions and she told me to get in my tub and they should eventually go away. Well, after being in the tub for an hour, they were not going away, they were actually becoming more regular (15 mins. apart). I finally got out of the tub, put my hypnosis cd on and tried to get some rest but they were now 10-15 mins. apart. (10am). At 11 am I went to the bathroon thinking I had pee'd on myself to find bloody show and the contractions are about 15 mins. apart. I did go to the restroom since then and I definitely lost some of my plug. So as of now my doula says I am in early labor. I will keep you guys updated as the day progresses since I am not going anywhere near the hospital anytime soon. I did forget to mention in my last post (about my hospital experience last night) that when they had me on the NST I was having some contractions but wasn't feeling them. I will write later and keep me in your thoughts for a successful natural VBAC Biggrin . Mary

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That sounds really promising! I'm officially stalking you, now... Wink

xo Robin

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:kaos3: :kaos3: Go Mary Go! I'm so proud of you for standing your ground and not letting them bully you, especially with the "dead baby card". Now it looks like you're on your way to a successful vaginal birth and those :pissed: can't do anything about it! Keep us posted! Yahoo :boogie:

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Whoo, I hope this is it and you can tell those drs to kiss your ---.

I can't wait to hear how it goes!

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