Michelle's (lunabelle) Lodge! - postpartum

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jeniriti's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 134
Michelle's (lunabelle) Lodge! - postpartum

So I'm breaking protocol by an hour posting this before midnight when you technically reach 36 weeks...but I wanted to be the one to welcome you to your lodge! You are a big part of why I found this BN board and I'm grateful. I can't wait to share in your journey over the coming weeks! Congrats, Michelle!!

Jen

ErikaArcher's picture
Joined: 09/06/04
Posts: 379

:woohoo: welcome!

Singfourever's picture
Joined: 08/26/06
Posts: 306

yay, welcome to your lodge! How exciting!

Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 125

We are getting close, aren't we! Congrats!

How are you doing? Any news?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome to you lodge!!! Not long till you hold your little one!!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Wow, I was not expecting to see this when I got up at 5:30 this morning.. nice surprise Smile Jen, I had no idea I had anything to do with you becoming such a wonderful addition to this board Biggrin

I'll write my intro post as I eat my oatmeal and berries.

I have always loved the idea of lodges. Has anyone else here read Clan of the Cavebear and The Earth Children Series? My lodge is a cave like that and I invite you all to come and sit around my hearth where we'll drink mint teas (or RRL tea) and wait for things to happen together, lol.

I'm Michelle, I'm 27 and my DH is Jeff.. 25. I am a certified reflexologist and I also do tech support for Dell part time. Jeff is a welder and a guitar player/teacher. We met nearly 4 years ago at his house where I was doing reflexology on him as part of my studies. He was the roommate of a really good friend. The first time I saw him I was sure I had seen him before. We quickly fell for each other but didn't let on. Our first "date" we went to a bar to see a mutual friend play.. he's amazing (see link below). We got drunk on rye and ginger and later fell asleep on his couch watching Wayne's World.. He kissed me that night Smile

Several months later his roommate sold the house and I was about to move home because I could no longer afford living on my own so we rented a house together. One year after that we bought our home. We have a boxer named Rae Rae and a cat Misty. His mom lives in an apt in our house. A year and a half ago Jeff agreed it was okay for me to go off of birth control. I was on the patch, it made me depressed and ruined my sex drive. We were going to try natural methods and while I couldn't find good information about charting and temping at the time to prevent conception, I thought I knew enough about my body and the length of my cycles. Oops.. we got pregnant about two cycles into that. (What do you mean women don't ovulate on CD 14 of a lunar length cycle??) I thought Jeff would be upset with me but he was sooo excited so I was too. We both wanted to be married before the baby was born so we could all have the same name but had put off a wedding previously for practical reasons. We booked a hotel room at Niagara Falls and planned to elope that April.

In March we went for our first ultrasound. My mom was in town so we invited her along. The tech took me into the room alone first so they waited in the waiting room. I couldn't see the screen but I was anxiously awaiting my turn to see.. He left the room and said he just had to go and consult a dr. and he'd be right back.. I thought this was normal until a short while later mom and Jeff came into the room in tears. I had no idea what was going on. The baby was already gone, no heartbeat.. He/she measured a few weeks behind. I had a D & C the next day. We cancelled our elopement and got busy healing and TTC.

This is when I found prg.org's TTCAL and this board. I only lurked here while TTC. We conceived again last September. We started making wedding plans again.. so we do things a little backwards Wink

This pregnancy has been awesome. Everyone is really excited.. this is a first on my family's side. A first great grandchild and grandchild. I love being pregnant. I love my belly. I've been really blessed with good health, low blood pressure and hormones that treat me better than when I'm not pregnant.

Getting Jeff to agree to using a mw at first was a little hard.. He didn't really get the idea behind it until he met them. Over the course of the last 8 months he's continued to amaze me with his support in my decisions. He even wants to plant a tree over the placenta at our cottage. I would have never expected HIM to suggest something like this. Even I wouldn't have suggested it.

We got married on February 24th. We had a very very small wedding. I wore my mom's dress. Our friend who we watched play on our first "date" played at our wedding. It was perfect. No cake, no registry, no DJ, no photographer, just family and a very small group of friends at the after party.

We keep our money seperate for the most part except for a joint acct for bills, mortgage, taxes etc. I started doing Dell tech support to accumulate some hours for my maternity leave. In Ontario we get 55% of our income for a year off of maternity leave.. but not if you're self employed, which I was. Needless, I'm really poor right now and it is going to be a big adjustment for me to get used to relying on Jeff and giving up my financial independence.

We have been REALLY fortunate and have received a lot of gifts.. grandma is very excited. We have a cute bassinette in our room, I set up a playpen in the living room last night with a basinette level and a changing thing on top. We have car seats and cloth diapers, a contoured changing pad.. lots of nb sized cloths but not too much more. We don't have a crib or a stroller yet but I'm sure those things will come. Our nursery is less of a nursing and more of a birthing room in the works. I'll take pictures after I tidy it up again. It has an old iron bed in it that was my great grandmothers. She was a lay mw who had her own 13 babies at home, possibly on that bed. My dad and 12 of his siblings were also born at home, 1 sibling at the hospital because the dr. wasn't going to be available.

We live a few residential blocks away from the hospital so we're really not nervous about trying for a homebirth and I can't believe I found a husband who is so onboard. I only dreamt of having a homebirth since my teenage years but doubted it would ever be a reality.. I guess we'll see Biggrin

And some pictures....


Jeff and I


Rock N Roll Jeffrey


The Bride & Groom


Chris and Jeff entertaining at the wedding

www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBaaFa2Evp4
And the music...This is Chris, Jeff's best friend who he calls his "brother" who I also went to highschool and grew up partying with.

We're thinking we're more likely to have a little musician than a hockey player but obviously we're open to whatever he wants to do. His name will likely be Marshall William but we haven't told anyone that for sure yet. Marshall because someone suggested it, Jeff uses Marshall amps and because we like it. William is one of Jeff's middle names and he had two uncle Bills and his grandpa was also William. He passed away last July.

Thanks for reading our story.

amylizh's picture
Joined: 12/25/05
Posts: 81

I'm so excited to be following your lodge! I love the idea of the bed that belongs to your lay mw grandma...awesome.

Joined: 10/22/06
Posts: 1033

Congrats on your lodge! I can't wait to follow your home birth journey and I love that your DH suggested planting the placenta under a tree. Very sweet!

Joined: 08/25/05
Posts: 392

Michelle, I love your story, it sounds like you have a great relationship with your DH!! Welcome to your lodge!

Joined: 11/15/05
Posts: 467

Thanks so much for sharing your story Michelle. Congrats on your little one and what sounds like a beautiful intimate wedding. I think it's great that you get to use the bed used previously by your g'ma... that is so cool!

jeniriti's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 134

Michelle-
Thanks for sharing the story of how you and Jeff met and have built a life together. Sounds like you two have been able to come togther at difficult times and support one another! The wedding sounds so intimate and romantic! It must feel wonderful that Jeff has been so supportive of your desire for a homebirth and even coming up with his own plans for your placenta!!

I may just be a technology idiot but I cannot see the wedding pics you posted...

Are you going to work at Dell and with your reflexology up until your due date?

Jen

Joined: 01/10/07
Posts: 51

Congrats on your lodge!!! I look forward to following your homebirth journey!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome Michelle! I look forward to getting to know you better during the next weeks! BTW, I can't see the pics either.

TodayIVow's picture
Joined: 02/25/08
Posts: 110

Wha a beautiful and charming story!!!

I am so sorry for your loss.

This will be a great journey!!!

Thanks for allowing us to join you.

Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 125

What a great story. We have a lot in common. (see my lodge Wink )

Fawn's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 141

Congrats on your lodge!!! We are in the homestretch now Michelle!!! Great story btw, I'm so excited for another June baby lodge Smile

ErikaArcher's picture
Joined: 09/06/04
Posts: 379

What a story you have. I look forward to sharing your journey.

Joined: 02/25/07
Posts: 290

Congratulations on your lodge! You and your DH look so happy together, and you were gorgeous on your wedding day. I love following these lodges.

And no, I haven't read Clan of the Cave Bear....not me.... :Whistle:

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

"aylaanne" wrote:

And no, I haven't read Clan of the Cave Bear....not me.... :Whistle:

LOL.. I wondered...

I named my first ferret Ayla, hehe.

I LOVE that series. I wont let myself finish Shelters of Stone because I don't want it to be done.. so I gave it to my sister and her bf to read first.. I want to start over at the beginning since I actually started the series when I was around 14 yrs old.

That is one series of books that gets passed around our family and friends to both men and women and everyone loves them.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I wanted to add a post to mention how I've been feeling. This last week has found me feeling a lot more tired. I hope the nesting kicks in soon because I love having the energy to clean. I was doing really really well energy wise up until this past week. I feel like I'm just lazing around in the evenings waiting for bed time..trying not to go to sleep too early.

I wake up a lot throughout the night. Rolling over to change sides is tricky, lol.. My hips get sore and I have to switch sides, adjust my body pillow etc. at least a couple of times throughout the night.

I've been having more and more braxton hicks contractions.. last night I had a lot of them.

I have been having random cramps but usually on one side or the other, sometimes low but not too intense, nothing regular or patterned. I figure this is because my belly is getting so big.

I sometimes get heartburn pretty bad, especially at night.

TMI - I am so happy I've been able to continue to have regular BMs throughout this pregnancy so far.

When I have to pee, I have to pee now because it's so uncomfortable and then it's only like 1/2 a cup.

I know this baby is low and has been engaged for weeks.

Is the random crampiness something everyone starts to feel in the last month?

I've had lots of people ask me how long I intend to work.. That's so hard to know. I can't afford to stop working at all but obviously have to.. has anyone else worked until labour started or am I crazy to even think that? Has anyone ever heard of a mama's water breaking at work? I can just see myself on a call with a customer having contractions but trying to finish the call, lol.

ETA: Oh and smells bother me now! People stink, lol. I can smell everything long before other people notice it.

Joined: 06/01/06
Posts: 174

Yay for your lodge! How exciting!
Yes, I have read the clan of the cave bear books and LOVE them! And yes, I worked until May 1, went into labor that evening (or maybe at work, I was really crampy) and had Sara on the 2nd. I think water will normally break at night if it breaks before labor starts.
Good luck!

ErikaArcher's picture
Joined: 09/06/04
Posts: 379

I think the fatigue at and crampiness is very normal at the end. i worked up until the end with my first. I have always held the philosophy that if you listen to your body you will know when to stop or back down. Be sure to stay well hydrated and nourished. Sleep is so hard at the end of a pregnancy and it's when we need the rest most. Try to find ways to relax during the day - even if it's jsut sitting in an office or room with dim lights for 5-10 minutes. i sued to sneak away when i was working with my first rpegnancy and just "be" in a quiet place. i think it heps the body and the mind. Hugs! Your getting close. Erika

Joined: 02/25/07
Posts: 290

To be honest, my name DOESN'T come from the Earth's Children books. It's a nickname and it evolved naturally over time, and then my mom read the books when I was older (later I "borrowed" them and now I own most of them).

I work at an Assisted Living facility and one of the mamas there had her water break while she was at work. She finished her shift. Biggrin Thanks for the update!

ourfirstblessing's picture
Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 1094

congrats on your lodge. hope your last weeks are pregnancy are great and you get the work thing figured out.

Joined: 04/13/04
Posts: 245

welcome to you lodge!!!!!! loved reading your story and i too loved clan of the cave bear series!!!!!!!!

look forward to sharing your journey!!

(nak)

Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 125

Michelle, how are you doing this week?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I started writing a post earlier today inbetween/during calls but it's been busy and then my browser crashed and I lost everything Wink

I have my homevisit with the mw tonight so I'll post after that.

Thanks for checking with me Smile I'm great.

Joined: 11/15/05
Posts: 467

I look forward to hearing an update Michelle. I too am planning on working right up until my due date. Granted, my work starts a "shutdown" period 1 week before I am due, so I am fully expecting to go away for holidays and then not return! As was mentioned, listen to your body. I've snuck down to our first aid room for the odd nap at lunch time Smile

Joined: 08/07/07
Posts: 137

I am catching up and loved reading your story--you and your dh sound like a very cute couple. I am excited to hear about your homebirth.

Joined: 02/25/07
Posts: 290

Looking forward to hearing about your home visit!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Okay, so this is the third time I've started writing this post, lol. I just formatted our home computer, always a fun time.

The home visit was nice. Jeff still gets nervous whenever the mw palpates my tummy to see how low baby is etc. He's afraid she squeezes him too hard.. he's too cute. My blood pressure was higher than it has been but is still low. It's consistently been like 86/38 and was up to 120/64. Not sure why, but still nothing to be concerned about. I'd rather it be a little more normal than too low anyway.

The spare room is almost ready, lots of receiving blankets, towels, bowls, a crockpot, face cloths, garbage bags etc. I still have to make the bed and buy a plastic sheet. The mw will bring a birthing stool. She loved our tub and said I should look forward to spending a lot of time in there. We have an antique claw foot tub so it's nice and deep.

My mom is still trying really hard to be okay with the homebirth. I am planning to have one more talk with her to try and extinguish what fears I can. This past weekend we were at her house and I said I had a bit of a pain in my rib cage. She quickly said, you know, if you're this uncomfortable now you better have the baby in the hospital. I laughed and said, did I ask for a tylenol? It barely hurts. Jeff spoke up and said "I think she'll be uncomfortable regardless of where she is." I was so proud of him supporting me like that. I told him so last night. Mom sort of realized how ridiculous she sounded and we laughed a little.

Everything is great, I still feel great. I am getting a little of my energy back. Last night I was really really hot all night. I slept with a cold cloth and woke up sweaty often. Today is supposed to be really hot.

My mw's say my due date is June 13th so by their dates I am officially allowed to have baby at home any time now because I'm already 37 weeks.

This is my weekend, I have a reflexology session today but I also have to finish my taxes, address my thank you cards that I wrote weeks ago, clean up the babies room some more and wash bedding, make a few phone calls etc. so I better get going.

jeniriti's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 134

My mw's say my due date is June 13th so by their dates I am officially allowed to have baby at home any time now because I'm already 37 weeks.

YAY!!!! I'm so glad you've made this milestone!! How great is it knowing that in a very short time you'll be laying in your amazing tub while your body works on bringing your son out to meet you and Jeff??

My mom is still trying really hard to be okay with the homebirth. I am planning to have one more talk with her to try and extinguish what fears I can.

I think it's really a testament to your character that you are putting time and energy into bringing your mom along. It is such an important relationship but can sap so much of you---it'll be worth it in the long run! I really hope she comes around...it could be such a powerful evolution for HER if she's able to be open and experience your homebirth!

I was so proud of him supporting me like that. I told him so last night.

Aww....what a great guy;-) Cheers to Jeff!!

Stay cool, girl!!

Jen

Joined: 10/26/06
Posts: 33

I'm coming in late, and hope I'll still be online for the next few weeks to follow your lodge! It's so exciting, being so close. I'm a few weeks behind you, so I will be glued to your posts to see how it goes.

Ditto on the braxton hicks - they are really getting more noticeable now! Glad to hear the baby's engaged and ready for action. It must feel great to know you're set for home birthing.

Hurray!

Joined: 11/15/05
Posts: 467

Your husband sounds so supportive. That is awesome! I find it amazing how they can rally around us and give us what we need. Good work!

Joined: 08/25/05
Posts: 392

It's great that your DH stoop upi for you like that! And yeah! for being all clear for a home delivery!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Today was my day off and I got so much done, I'm so impressed with myself. I finished formatting the computer, installing drivers etc., had a great breakfast, did my taxes, mailed my taxes in, addressed my thank you cards, mailed them, did like 5 loads of laundry including pillows for the birth and hung them on the line, put them away, did the dishes, went shopping with my mom etc. so I spent a lot of time on my feet.

When I came home from shopping I took off my top layer shirt which is sort of flowy or poofy and looked in the mirror at my tight tank and thought, where the heck is my belly? Oh there it is down there! When I look down it looks smaller because its more low than sticky outy like it was and his feet and bum and everything are way lower.

No wonder I have been having tiny pee's every 15 mins.

ErikaArcher's picture
Joined: 09/06/04
Posts: 379

Sounds like you have started dropping! how exciting. Ont he mom topic. My mom was really anxious with my first homebirth and she wouldmake little "way out" kind of comments. One day i finally explained all the equipment our MW carries. My mom was really stuck on "If you want to avoid all the interventions then just go to the hospital as late as possible. and then I said to her "mom, I promise you I have only the baby and my best interest at heart. I want you to think of it this way. I am going to go into labor and stay at home as long as possible. In the mean time people who are trained are going to come and be here with me. If at anytime things change I and I don't feel comfortable or there is some indication of a problem or even if I just don;t want to be here, I can and will get in the car and go to the hospital." After Olivia's birth she told me that it really helped her to think of it that way. With the twins she was very worried. But she also knew me and she trusted in my own trust of my body. She very carefully suggested once to choose a hospital birth but then never ever made another comment.

I think it's wonderful that you are working with your mom on this. I know it's easy to get frustrated and just want to shout "grrrr this is MY birth" but we were their babies and in the end they are just scared for us. After all they are moms Smile

It sounds like you are doing well! Keep up the good work and :clappy: for your DH

Joined: 02/25/07
Posts: 290

I'm happy that you were able to get a bunch of stuff done. That always feels good at the end of the day. And yay for dropping!

Joined: 11/15/05
Posts: 467

Good for you being so busy! I figure we may as well use the energy while we've got it! Smile

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Michelle~ I am loving your lodge hon!!! Thanks for letting us in. Yes, I would love a cup of mint tea. Smile I look forward to continuing to follow your story all the way through. (((HUGS))) It has been a long journey, I know.

Everything seems to be going so well for you. I am so happy for you and Jeff.

Kristi

TodayIVow's picture
Joined: 02/25/08
Posts: 110

Sounds like you are doing really great!!!!

Glad you were able to get so much done on your day off.

How wonderful to have such a supportive DH. That's great!!!

I am so excited for you!!!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I think I'm experiencing a lack of emotion. I'm not really complaining, I like having peace and usually strive to have peace over highs and lows but I'm wondering if I'm in for a wake up call. Am I too confident?

I'm not scared of the birth, I'm ready, I look forward to it, but I'm not anxious or impatient feeling yet. I look forward to being a mom, I'm ready, I'm not scared but I'm not impatient feeling yet. I feel like I can handle the next few weeks or however long it takes.

Someone asked me today if I was getting excited and I said no, but I'm not dreading it.. sort of neutral. DH is the same way. Maybe it is just our personality types to take things in stride.

I really want to know what the baby looks like if anything.

We're all ready now, I made the bed last night with plastic etc. and clean sheets. My bags are packed, babies bag is packed. We have some frozen suppers in the freezer. I made my popsicles. We have a bassinette, the playpen is set up in the living room. We don't have a stroller but I have a sling and a didymos type carrier. We don't have a crib yet but we wont need one for a little while. No highchair, just one of those cheapo ones you strap to a chair.. but we wont be using that for a while anyway.

I just wonder if I'm being too naive about all of this. It feels too easy.

Might I add that I've always wanted a baby. I'm an oldest sibling who played a huge part in bringing up my siblings and cousins. I've been changing diapers almost since I was just out of them myself. I used to babysit newborn infants and have lots of baby experience.. I've already been through the breakdowns where I've had to step away because a baby wouldn't stop crying... Maybe next week I will feel some fear or excitement or something.

I have more to post about who is going to be at the birth but I just got a call so rather than risk losing another update.. I'll post more later.

Joined: 08/07/07
Posts: 137

Michelle--you have things ready that is great and I think you are just waiting... With my first I had a hard time believing I was really going to have a baby and I feel the same way now, that I am going to have another one. If someone asked me if I was excited I would be neutral in the same way you explained...it just doesn't feel real for me at least until they get here.

Do you think it could partially be that? I don't think you are too confident, it sounds like you have had a lot of experience that makes you what I would call comfortable and that is a great place to be.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

That sounds right, maybe it hasn't really sunk it yet.. If anything I'm afraid that when it does hit me it will be like a brick wall.

jeniriti's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 134

Michelle-
You don't sound overconfident or naive to me...you sound like you are just at peace with where you are! I, frankly, feel very similar to you---of course I want to meet the baby and am looking forward to being a mommy but I wouldn't say I'm anxious or on the edge of my seat excited. I know it is coming and it will happen and I'm fine with experiencing it when it comes... Sometimes when people ask me questions like they've asked you it makes me wonder if something's wrong with me, too. But I've come to the conclusion that it's just that I'm okay with everything as it is...I'm enjoying my pregnancy and things are good. And so what if something hits you like a ton of bricks later?? Worry or stressing doesn't make ANYTHING any better...it just steals moments of peace and joy from you. So even IF there's really, really tough stuff ahead, thinking about that now won't prevent it from happening or make it any easier to deal with...it just robs you of the NOW! You are fine...enjoy your peace and tranquility!!

Jen

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

"lunabelle" wrote:

I'm not scared of the birth, I'm ready, I look forward to it, but I'm not anxious or impatient feeling yet. I look forward to being a mom, I'm ready, I'm not scared but I'm not impatient feeling yet. I feel like I can handle the next few weeks or however long it takes.

I can understand that feeling..thats where I am at too. Im not USUALLY the most patient person(totally not) But I have some sort of comfort in the baby coming when he is ready. Just taking it all a day at a time.. People think its odd..like we should all be on the edge of our seats. Relax..your not alone. Sounds like your ready..mentally ,emotionally and baby wise. Enjoy being pregnant.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

OK, more TMI from me.

My insides all feel like they are ... falling down and out almost. Am I the only one? I don't want to get too graphic but I know my parts from TTC, charting etc.... nothing is anything like it used to be. This may sound gross, but I wish I could see. Is the cervix way lower than normal at this point? Is everything extremely soft and mushy?

Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 125

"lunabelle" wrote:

I just wonder if I'm being too naive about all of this. It feels too easy.

I think reality will set in soon enough and you will be anxious and excited and tired and elated and happy and tired and overwhelmed and tired and emotional in more ways than you can imagine.

Don't sweat the little things. Go easy on yourself.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Last night we finally used a gift certificate for supper that we had been saving. Friends of ours gave us a big gift certificate as a wedding gift to an expensive steak and seafood restaurant here. We dressed up a little (read: didn't wear jeans) and I put on a little eye liner, hehe, and had a really nice supper together. We were sooo stuffed. It didn't look like a lot of food but we had desert too. Afterwards we went shopping for a few annuals and veggie plants for the garden. It was a really nice night. We were saving the gc for a nice night before the baby came. I suggested we go for a walk after supper but DH said I wasn't allowed to have the baby yet because he wanted to go for a couple more bike rides this weekend Lol

Maybe next weekend he'll be ready Wink

ErikaArcher's picture
Joined: 09/06/04
Posts: 379

"lunabelle" wrote:

OK, more TMI from me.

My insides all feel like they are ... falling down and out almost. Am I the only one? I don't want to get too graphic but I know my parts from TTC, charting etc.... nothing is anything like it used to be. This may sound gross, but I wish I could see. Is the cervix way lower than normal at this point? Is everything extremely soft and mushy?

Sounds like dropping and ripening Smile You can't see - but you might be able to feel. I know some women who practice all along to be able to check themselves (or teach their husbands)

Yeah to dinner out! I wish i could enjoy a peaceful meal with my DH

Joined: 10/22/06
Posts: 1033

I was thinking the same as Erika. I couldn't feel my cervix, but I could feel DD's head for a long time...made it feel like every was getting squashed and falling out, like you mentioned. My LO was born soon after dropping "very low", so sending you some easy labor vibes...right after DH's bike rides! Smile

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