~*~* (Becca's) Beccalina's Birth Lodge!*~*~

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mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302
~*~* (Becca's) Beccalina's Birth Lodge!*~*~

Welcome to your lodge and congrats on being in the "homestretch"!!

:band:

Looking forward to following your NCB story!!!

MrsHolmes83's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 240

Welcome Becca!!! I soo can't wait to read your intro and hear all about your birth!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

Oh my God Oh my God Yay!!!! :D:D I was hoping I'd get a lodge! Thank you so much Kristin! This is so much fun! Ok, let me gather my thoughts...I'll get to it!

mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302

WOOHOO! Cant wait to hear your intro!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

How Our Family Began

When I was 19 I moved out of my parents house and into an apartment with two of my friends. One of my friends had a boyfriend who snuck his way into the apartment too….then he ended up letting us know that his cousin would be moving in…..that was Missy (18 at the time)! We all lived together for almost a year and then everyone started going their own ways, except for Missy and I, we got along so well that we decided we would rent a place together.

We got an apartment and all the while, had our own boyfriends. Missy ended up getting pregnant and I have to say I was angered by it, but wasn’t sure what I was feeling, I mean, we were just friends, right? Well, Missy’s boyfriend left her, pregnant and all, and I went through the whole 9 months with her. I went to her doctor appointments, ultra-sounds, I was with her at the baby shower and I supported her through her morning sickness, which she had for everyday of the entire time, all day! Over the course of her pregnancy we really bonded and were truly best friends but I always knew I felt more.

When Christian was born (I was there when that beautiful little boy came into our lives), his father found out through friends that the baby had been born so he popped in to check him out. I was devastated to learn that Missy and he were going to give it another try. I didn’t hide my dismay, and Missy told me she was confused and thought that this is what she had to do because that was the way she’d always heard it should be. I knew she didn’t love him and I knew she loved me.

Sure enough, it didn’t work at all between them. They had nothing in common, she didn’t love him, he didn’t love her, so it was a very mutual split, and when Christian was 6 months old, Missy and I realized we were meant for each other!

Our anniversary is January 23rd, 2000. We also had a Civil Union Ceremony on June 27, 2006.

Here is a pic of the three of us

In 2002 we decided we wanted another baby (I would carry this time). We called up a local sperm bank and chose a donor from a catalog. We spent lots of money, only to have it fail. Sad We were still so young and didn’t have the money to keep trying so we put it off for a while.

A while turned into a very long time. We bought a house, so we figured we’d wait until we knew we could afford another child, then Missy decided to go back to school and that put things on hold even further, but I am very grateful she went because then we were ready to try for our baby…. finally after 5 long years!

Missy’s cousin Steven offered (well actually his wife Marilyn offered) to donate to us. The best part is that it was free of charge!

This is Steven and Marilyn (No words can ever express how grateful we are for them!!)

We started trying in November of 2007 and failed to conceive that first month. Then in December, we were all so busy with Christmas that we couldn’t find the time to get together and missed my ovulation time, but then in January…..we tried, and voila! Here I am!!

We are so unbelievably happy to have only a few more weeks until our daughter is here!

Here is my little girl! Her name is Phoebe Joy

All while I thought of having a baby, which has been everyday since some time in 2002, I thought I’d have an epidural. Everyone has told me how painful labor is and how they had epidurals and that they wouldn’t go without one. Well then I watched the Business of Being Born and that got me to thinking! I read up on natural child-birth, made a lot of web searches, got lots of info here, and I made the decision that I want a natural childbirth!

Thank you for following me along my journey! If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask!! (I realize my situation is far from the norm) Blum 3

mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302

Great intro!

You have a beautiful family! And I cant wait to hear about your new additions arrival!

I am glad to hear you liked BOBB....I snuck it on my blockbuster online que, and its in the mail as we speak (teehee, I pushed DHs shoot em up flicks out of the way)

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome to your lodge!

fuchsiasky's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 959

welcome to your lodge. sounds like Pheobe is coming into a wonderful family.

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

Congrats on the lodge, I can't wait to follow your last few weeks! You have a great looking family - and now a little girl to add to it!

(My copy of BOBB was messed up - impatiently waiting for the library to order me a new one from a different branch :argh:

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Congrats on your lodge! Loved your intro and following your story! Did Missy have a NCB?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Hi Becca,

Congrats on your lodge!!! I loved your intro - you have a touching story! You're lucky to have such generous people in your lives.

Is Christian excited to be a big brother?

Congrats again!!
Amy

Mrs.KC's picture
Joined: 05/27/10
Posts: 603

Welcome to your lodge!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

tHANKS GUYS!!!

"gobabygo" wrote:

congrats on your lodge! Loved your intro and following your story! Did missy have a ncb?

She ended up getting an epidural...although now she wishes that she would have tried to do it naturally. We were so young then...she was only 19 and had back labor as well.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Congrats on your lodge! Great intro!

aotus76's picture
Joined: 10/01/05
Posts: 170

Welcome to your lodge! I loved your intro.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome to your lodge! I look forward to following your story the rest of the way. Are you working? Is your son excited about his sister? How fun to have one of each, I love it and I'm sure you will too! Do you gals want more kids in the future or is this it?

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"graysonsmom" wrote:

welcome to your lodge! I look forward to following your story the rest of the way. Are you working? Is your son excited about his sister? How fun to have one of each, i love it and i'm sure you will too! Do you gals want more kids in the future or is this it?

He is getting pretty excited. At first you could tell that he was a little worried because he's always been the only child and grandchild for 9 years and was afraid that all the attention would be on her...but he seems to have gotten over that and now says he cant wait for her to get here!!
Also, this is it for us...one of each is perfect!

alicia715's picture
Joined: 03/25/08
Posts: 227

My DS is 10 and he's excited for a little brother. Maybe you could remind your DS that when his little sister is 10, he'll be 19. My DS says he plans on having his little brother stay with him at his "cool apartment" when he's 20 to watch movies and play video games all night because he knows what it's like to have a mom who won't let a 10 y.o. do that!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"alicia715" wrote:

My DS is 10 and he's excited for a little brother. Maybe you could remind your DS that when his little sister is 10, he'll be 19. My DS says he plans on having his little brother stay with him at his "cool apartment" when he's 20 to watch movies and play video games all night because he knows what it's like to have a mom who won't let a 10 y.o. do that!

Lol that's so funny and true!!

I'm going to bring up this topic at dinner tonight!

Joined: 07/17/02
Posts: 4

I love your story. It's awesome that you were friends first. My DH and I were friends for 5 years before we started to date.

My daughter was 7 1/2 when her first sister was born.... Christian will be such a big help. It's like having an extra set of hands. What I loved the most was sitting back and watching the relationship develop between the two of them. We recently offered Maddie(13) her own room but she declined and said she didn't want to leave Lily alone... awww

Enjoy watching them grow together. It seems to be going so fast.

keky's picture
Joined: 12/23/07
Posts: 163

I love your story! I'm glad you missed your December cycle so you could be in Oct 2008!! Can't wait to see your little girl!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Congrats and welcome to your lodge!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

Keky~ I was so happy to know I was having an October baby! October is my favorite month! I love Halloween and the fall in general!

Thank you everyone for going through this "home stretch" with me, I think it's wonderful to have a place like this, and not just a lodge, but I mean pg.org...I have met so many wonderful people here! I tell my mother about the boards and she is so jealous. She wonders where this kind of support was when she was pregnant. We are so lucky to have each other! Biggrin

So I have an OB appointment tomorrow evening. I plan on talking to my doc about wanting a doula. I also have my GBS test and an internal. I'm anxious to see if there has been any progress with all of these take my breath away bh contractions. We'll see....ok well, talk to you all tomorrow! Good night!! Biggrin

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I agree, pg.org is a great source of support, but this board in particular is a really great place, everyone is so encouraging and positive!

Keep us posted on your dr appointment!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Welcome to your lodge pretty lady!!!!! I am so glad you are due in October! October is a wonderful MONTH! Good luck today at your appt. I have one also and get to have my check and GBS test! Negative GBS result vibes for both of us!!!!

Have you found a doula or are you just thinking about it? I would love to get one but we just can't afford one! Good luck Becca!

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"kere02" wrote:

welcome to your lodge pretty lady!!!!! I am so glad you are due in october! October is a wonderful month! Good luck today at your appt. I have one also and get to have my check and gbs test! Negative gbs result vibes for both of us!!!!

Have you found a doula or are you just thinking about it? I would love to get one but we just can't afford one! Good luck becca!

thanks! Good luck on your appt! We have not found a doula and honestly we really cant afford one either. We do have a friend of ours who has had 4 kids already and knows a lot of stuff that we dont know and we're thinking of asking her if she would come and be a doula type person for us. She's actually marilyn..the donors wife!!!

fuchsiasky's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 959

That could be really cool to have her as a doula type person. This little one is coming into such a big group of people who will love her that having one more to welcome her could be really nice. Is your donor going to be able to come and meet her soon after her arrival too?

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

Yes of course, we really never discussed him being in the delivery room and I'm not all that sure I want him in there when she comes out, but he can definitely be at the hospital! He is going to play an active role in her life. I know it sounds like it will be confusing, but she will know that he is her dad. The situation with Christian's father worked out so well that we really wanted a known donor who would be willing to be in the child's life. Missy's cousin being that person is a blessing because we know and trust him and his wife. Biggrin

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

So I am back from my appointment. I had a NST and everything was great. She also did the GBS test and I will have the results next week I think. I had to see the nurse practitioner because my doc had an emergency so I didn't talk to her about my doula plan.

I had an internal check and there is no dilation at all....I'm closed up tight but she did say that my cervix is low and about 20% effaced.

I go back in two weeks for another ultrasound...I'm so excited to see my baby again!

Anyway, pretty uneventful. Just wanted to update you all!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

thats great that the donor will get to play an active roll! Does he have any kids of his own? This may be dumb question- but who all will be listed on the birth certificate?

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Being dialated or effaced at this point isn't really a good indicator of when labor will start IMO how you are feeling is much better indicator. Hope your GBS is negative!

KUP on your "doula" plans. Smile

Sarah-Jean's picture
Joined: 10/25/01
Posts: 1335

I'm glad you had a good and uneventful appointment!

Here's hoping the GBS test comes back all clear for you!

Love,

Sarah-Jean

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"GoBabyGo" wrote:

thats great that the donor will get to play an active roll! Does he have any kids of his own? This may be dumb question- but who all will be listed on the birth certificate?

Not a dumb question! We actually are not sure of that yet! I don't think Steven wants to be on the birth certificate. We know that legally Missy cannot be on it, we may look into second parent adoption, but I am going to make a will stating what I want to happen if something were to happen to me.

Steven has one biological daughter with Marilyn, there are 3 others that she had from a previous marriage but he takes care of all of them. Penelope is his daughter and she is 7 years old. She is very excited to be having a sister! She is so adorable and so I know my lo will be too! Biggrin

"Shella5478" wrote:

Being dialated or effaced at this point isn't really a good indicator of when labor will start IMO how you are feeling is much better indicator. Hope your GBS is negative!

KUP on your "doula" plans. Smile

Yeah, I've decided that I am not going to count on any of that. I know she will come when she is good and ready Smile

I emailed a couple local doulas yesterday and so far have gotten no response. In reality I don't think we can really afford a doula so I am trying to find a doula in training that will be low or no cost....not only will it help her build her reputation, it will give Missy and I some more support. So I'll keep you all posted on whatever happens.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

just catching up on your lodge, hope your GBS is negative. Its nice to hear the donor wants to be a part of the baby's life, thats awesome

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

It's fun that your little lady will have your donor be a part of her life, and have a big sister. Is Christian close to the donor and his family? There are so many dynamics I've never thought of that you get to deal with. I hope your feeling well this weekend, and that your GBS is negative!

Mrs.KC's picture
Joined: 05/27/10
Posts: 603

Hoping you are GBS neg!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

How are you feeling today Becca?

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"GraysonsMom" wrote:

It's fun that your little lady will have your donor be a part of her life, and have a big sister. Is Christian close to the donor and his family? There are so many dynamics I've never thought of that you get to deal with. I hope your feeling well this weekend, and that your GBS is negative!

Well, the donor (Steven) is Missy's cousin, so since he is family, we see them often and everyone loves Christian, and of course Christian loves them too.

Yeah, it seems that it could get pretty complicated at times when you really read into it. We decided we are never going to lie to Phoebe about the situation. She will know the way everyone is related....Christian has done so well with all of it. We taught him early on about acceptance and all of the different types of families there can be. Christian has 3 sets of grandparents (Missy's parents, His dad's parents, and my parents ) Phoebe will be the same. She will have my parents, Steven's parents, Missy's parents ) Christian loves this! It all means extra love for him and Phoebe will be no different.

I know there will be things that come up that we haven't thought about, but we are ready to face them.

Nicole~ I am feeling good. I lost some of my mucus plug last night and more today. I know that doesn't mean labor is tomorrow but it is a step in the right direction!

mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302

I hope your GBS Negative!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Hey! Losing your mucous plug is one step in the right direction, a positive sign your body is getting ready! Biggrin

Joined: 03/16/15
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I never thought about 3 sets of Grandparents, what kid wouldn't LOVE that! How fun that there are so many people around to love your kids:) Every little sign of labor counts for something, your body is getting ready!!

Joined: 03/16/15
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Sounds like Phoebe is reving things up! At least I hope so! She is going to be a doll..I haven't lost any mucus plug! Sad Whoever thought I would be upset by such a thing! HAHAHA..
This may be a TMI question but can you feel yourself losing it??

MrsHolmes83's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 240

that is awesome that Phoebe will have 3 sets of grandparents!!! She is gonna be sooo spoiled and you are gonna have trouble dividing your time with all of them haha.

Congrats on losing your plug!!!!

connorsmum's picture
Joined: 11/29/02
Posts: 1160

How great about the donor wanting to be part of Phoebe's life and who wouldn't want 3 sets of grandparents? Yay for the mucus plug too, a step in the right direction.

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"kere02" wrote:

Sounds like Phoebe is reving things up! At least I hope so! She is going to be a doll..I haven't lost any mucus plug! Sad Whoever thought I would be upset by such a thing! HAHAHA..
This may be a TMI question but can you feel yourself losing it??

I didn't feel myself losing it, it was on the toilet paper when I wiped...but maybe someone else has felt it? I dunno...

Thanks! I know she will be so cute...I keep comparing her u/s pic to Shiloh Jolie Pitt and I swear my daughter is going to look like her :p:p

beccalina's picture
Joined: 02/11/08
Posts: 106

"MrsHolmes83" wrote:

that is awesome that Phoebe will have 3 sets of grandparents!!! She is gonna be sooo spoiled and you are gonna have trouble dividing your time with all of them haha.

Congrats on losing your plug!!!!

Yeah! It's going to be interesting...

Missy's mom and Steven's mom are sisters and both will be grandma...we will see what happens, I bet they will go through a "spoiling war" lol

The good thing is we won't have to split the holidays with them because we are always together.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Thats great that you all are so open and honest! She has so much love and support!!! Yippie for the mucas plug!!

mrskris10's picture
Joined: 03/27/07
Posts: 302

Yahoo

For Mucus!!!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Your so lucky that you don't have to divide holidays! That is a HUGE plus, I hate divideing every big event it's such a drag. Imagaine what her first christmas and birthday will be like with all the grandmas:) So have you had any contractions? Any fun plans for the week/ weekend? When do you go to the doc again? It's really a cool thing that Missy has already had a baby so she can actually understand what your going through and how your feeling. I bet she's getting super excited to have a tiny person in the house with you all again!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I ditto Vanessa! Your lucky on the holidays. I'm not looking forward to the holidays for all the running. But I'm going to just put my foot down! Biggrin

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

How are you today hun? I hope all is well with you and the fam!

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