(((((HUGS))))) I'm so sorry things ended up like they did! I don't have a birth story typed up yet but suffice it to say mine went nothing like planned either Good for you for sticking it out as long as you did, and for being able to sacrifice your plans for the sake of your beautiful baby girl!
Hope your recovery is going well, both physically and emotionally
I hope you heal quickly hun. It sounds like you went through a lot in a very short time period. I'm sorry it didn't go as planned, but am so thankful she's healthy and doing so well now. Best wishes for easy nurseing!
Congratulations on your baby girl! Cecelia is beautiful...she looks so big compared to my 7 lb 3 oz DD at birth! It is wonderful that you had good people around you who you trust who took care of you and your baby though a difficult birth. I'm sorry you didn't get the birth you wanted. It is normal to be disappointed--even though you are glad you have a healthy baby, and a c-section was the best birth for Cecelia, you still have a right to feel sad that you didn't get to have a natural childbirth. It is probably next to impossible to really be prepared for an emergency c-section--of course you know in advance that if it is necessary for your baby, you'll do it, but the very definition of emergency is that it is something that is not expected. One of the mamas on this board who had a c-section once described it as like having your plane crash and having to walk to your destination--you are glad you got there and you are fine--but it would be considered normal to feel upset after going through that. Hope that makes sense.
Sorry I haven't been able to come back and do updates. I've been having a hard time keeping up with just my BB, much less any other.
Today is Cecelia's one-month birthday! It's also our one month nursing milestone! Yippee! I think breastfeeding has been more challenging than labor (of course my labor didn't last very long)! We had some latching issues, but I think we've finally fixed them. We've also had those days when she wants to eat all the time and I still have to supplement with EBM or formula. But each day things get easier. I actually fed her today while walking through Wal-mart. And that was no easy task considering she now weighs 11lbs!
She's more alert and focusing on things and beginning to track objects. She's becoming much more vocal and makes these little mewing sounds, almost like a happy whimper, if that make sense. She still rarely cries. Her head control improves every day.
We had her newborn pictures taken last Saturday. I'm so excited to get the disc with all the pics on there (shower, maternity, birth, and newborn) so I can finally post some of them.
I have lost 37 of the 55 lbs I gained during pg. Thank you breastfeeding! And I can wear some of my pre-pg tops (the ones that are roomy enough in the bust), but I haven't given up my maternity pants. They're way too comfy!
Emotionally, things started to improve for me a couple of weeks ago. Between your kind words and talking to my friends (two of whom had unexpected but not emergency sections), I've realized that all my feelings were normal. They didn't make me a bad mother. Thank you. I still feel like I was cheated out of something, but I've heard my Dr is VBAC friendly, so at my 6 week check up, I plan on asking him. Hopefully if I ever get pg again, I can try again for a NCB.
I just feel really blessed and lucky to have delivered a healthy daughter (no matter how she got here) and to have recovered quickly and to have such a wonderful support system IRL and on-line.
This is one of my favorite pics of Cecelia. I hope you enjoy it as well.
Last edited by monkeycat; 01-08-2010 at 08:41 PM.
Faith is the realization of what is hoped for and evidence of things not seen - Hebrews 11:1
Me-31 DH-38 - Living with MFI since 10/2004 - Not preventing since 6/2000
BFP after 2nd IUI -> Angel Baby-> Morgan Kinsley-08/15/06 at 9w3d-EDD 03/17/07
BFP after 1st IVF . . . . gave us our earth-angel . . . .
Cecelia Elaine - 12/08/09 9lb 9.1oz 21in 6:50pm
I can't believe it's already been a month! I love the picture of Cecelia. It is so cute how she's all curled up. I'm glad to hear nursing is going well! And yay for losing the weight! I'm glad you are feeling better about your feelings about what happened at the birth.