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Thread: ~~**~~Stacey's (Spacer) Birth Lodge~~**~~

  1. #21
    Posting Addict MrsMangoBabe's Avatar
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    Tiven's birth story made me cry--especially when your DH said "Is this an emergency or do we have time to talk?" I'm sure it was scary, but you handled it very well at the time. It sounds like you were in good hands and they moved quickly to get Tiven here safely. I'm glad they supported your BFing. I think I would have difficulty recovering from that kind of experience, as well. I hope you can continue to heal from it as you plan for the Ginger Baby's birth.
    -Brittany
    Doula, Childbirth Educator, and Mom to three adorable troublemakers
    Two time joyful Hypnobabies natural birthing mom
    My blog: Birth Unplugged

  2. #22
    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    I'm doing dual care with my home birth midwives, Sue and her apprentice Rebecca, and my OB, Dr. F who is actually the Chief of Obstetrics who delivered Tiven. After Tiven's birth, I got a copy of my & Tiven's records and had a lot of questions, and she spent literally an hour on the phone with me one day going over them. About a year later, my nurse practitioner retired and I needed to choose a new care provider, so I asked if Dr. F was available, and she was! She's awesome, she has a great "bedside manner," and she's chock-full of up-to-date information. And although she's not terribly home birth friendly, she recognizes that I'm very educated & informed about my options & alternatives and that I've made a very thoughtful decision with safety in mind first & foremost.

    I had an appointment with Dr. F yesterday morning and everything was great. Blood pressure was 115/74, which is a little high for me but I had just helped DH move a door up the stairs right before leaving and then was stressing because we were running late and he chose to take the longest route possible. Pulse was 89. Weight was 163.8 (although my scale at home this morning said 161.5) which is a total of 15 pounds gained by their scale, and 13 by my scale. Belly measured 38, and she did the GBS swab. I declined her offer for a cervix check, I'm of the opinion that the information you get from them really doesn't mean anything unless you're in labor or overdue.

    We took a quick peek at the baby and confirmed that he is head down with his back to my right. Last week with the midwives, he was a perfect LOA but I suspected over the weekend that he'd flipped because all the wiggles are now on my left side instead of my right side. Oh well, at least he's head down. We talked a bit about what my plans are to encourage baby to not go overdue, and what I might want to do if he does. I said I was going to give baby every chance I can for him to come out the right way, and she's on board with that but she would want me to have NST/BPPs regularly, which I'm fine with. She's willing to consider induction over a repeat c-section if my body is favorable. In fact, she said she's seen a recent study that showed the safety of a "light" induction is better than a repeat c-section. I forgot to ask her for the details, I was just so excited that I wasn't going to have to fight that fight! I told her that we would talk about all that if I happen to make it past 41 weeks.
    David Letterman is retiring. Such great memories of watching him over the past thirty-two years!

  3. #23
    Prolific Poster strawberryshortk86's Avatar
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    I barely got around to read your story.

    I was also planning my wedding, and it was hard. The money was going to come out of our pockets with no help from anyone, yet our family wanted to invite everyone they knew. At the we ended up having a small chapel ceremony with around 15 guest. Our mothers where so upset that they didn't attend. We got more support from other people than our own family. Until this day my mother still dreams of seeing me in this dream wedding. In my mind, I have what I wanted, to be with my DH. I also got married because I got tired of being treated like a stranger in important matters.

    Tiven story made me tear up. Hope you have a much better birth story with this Ginger baby. I am glad your appointment went so well. Everything seems to be looking great.
    Cursive Fonts Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married March '08. DS Anthony born July '09 and with Baby #2 EDD 3/27/13


  4. #24
    chevylfan
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    Yay for a rockin' good appt.

  5. #25
    Prolific Poster tanismom's Avatar
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    wow, Stacey, Tiven's birth was a whirlwind! But it really does sound like you handled the situation with grace and knowledge.

    I think it's a bit scary how pregnancy brings back so many issues that we thought we'd healed from. I'm glad you are taking the initiative to heal yourself through hypnotherapy - and I am hoping that Ginger baby's birth will also be a healing experience for you.
    ~Ayelet & Yoram
    Tani 7/6/04
    Odeliya 3/8/07
    NJ, USA to Israel 12/29/08
    Yitzchak, 22.6.09
    Asa'el, 14.10.11
    Welcome baby boy!! 26.7.13

    Rambling on at http://milkandhoneymomma.blogspot.com
    facebook and twitterID: ayeletschwell

  6. #26
    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    The Story of Ginger Baby
    When I was pregnant with Tiven, I figured she was going to be an only child and I was totally cool with that idea. Between my age, our finances, our lifestyle, and all that, it just seemed that one child was going to be it for us. Well, pretty much as soon as the drugs wore off after Tiven was born, I wanted to do it again. Pregnancy was so easy for me, Tiven was such a great baby, and I wanted another chance at giving birth. Not right away, of course, but sooner than later. I have two sisters whom I adore and I wanted that experience for my own little girl. Also, both of my parents are only children and had both loudly expressed how much they hated it. I went on the mini-pill and told DH that I would stay on it for a year or until I got my first post-partum period, whichever was longer, and then it was up to him.

    Tiven was seventeen months old when I finally got AF, and I went off the mini-pill. While I was ready & eager for another child, DH wasn't, and since he's our SAH parent I figured we had to do it on his timeframe, so I waited. And waited. The summer of 2006 Tiven turned 2 and we both turned 40, and I told DH that we either needed to start actively TTCing, or he needed to get snipped because I was getting sick & tired of the combination of condoms & abstaining. We decided to TTC and he wanted to try for a boy, so I bought some ovulation predictors and we had well-timed sex (along with doing some of the Shettles Method things to encourage boy sperm) for six months with no success. My OB did a round of hormone testing and everything looked good so we tossed the idea of trying for a boy and just had lots of sex for another six months. I was also using OPKs and charting to make sure that I was ovulating. In August of 2007, I got a BFP on DH's birthday but started bleeding the next day.

    At this point my OB referred me to the fertility clinic, which did some more extensive hormone testing, did an HSG to make sure my tubes weren't blocked, and did a sperm analysis on DH. Everything came out fine, and I was diagnosed with old eggs. The fertility doctor encouraged us to go straight to IVF with donor eggs, but that wasn't an option for us for a few different reasons. I asked for Femara, which anecdotally works better than Clomid in women over 40, but he wouldn't prescribe it because it's not an approved fertility treatment. He offered injectables ($1200/month) or Clomid ($50/month) and I took the Clomid. He said to take 50mg for three months and then we'd bump up to 100mg if I wasn't pregnant, but I went straight to 100mg. Four months of that (which was an absolutely miserable experience, horrible physical & emotional side effects, and ovulation pain like I couldn't believe) and in April 2008 I got another BFP that didn't stick around. Took a break cycle, and then tried the Clomid for another three months without success.

    A friend who was doing IVF had a month's worth of injectables left over (she skipped a cycle because her DH was out of the country, but he came home for an unexpected visit and she got pregnant!) and offered them to me. I asked DH about trying them and he didn't like the idea. I did it anyway, shhhhh.... my friend teased me about telling my future baby how he was the result of me shooting up in the bathroom at work! As much as people say how horrible injectables are, I actually didn't find them any worse than my experience with Clomid, but they didn't work.

    We then had a couple of months of half-hearted sex, not really paying much attention to anything, and we even talked about whether we wanted to quit TTCing altogether. I told DH that I wanted him to do something permanent. I'd been on BCP for 20+ years, carried our child and had major abdominal surgery to give birth to her, and done all kinds of things for 2+ years to try to have another child, and that was enough for me. Around this time, we found a suspicious lump in my belly and were trying to get a diagnosis for that, so TTC was really no longer on our radar. We were far more concerned about what this other thing was that was growing in my belly!

    I've never been an early tester, in fact I have never ever tested before CD 29 has come & gone. In November 2008 I had a routine annual appointment with my OB and asked her for BCP since DH had still not made an appointment for a vasectomy. She asked when my last period was and I told her, and she got out her little wheel and said, "Oh, it's been 28 days, do you want me to go get a pregnancy test?" I said no, that I'd take one the next day if AF didn't show. She entered the BCP prescription in the computer and wished me luck. I didn't test the next day, or the next, or the next, or the next. Finally on CD 33 I picked up a test on my way to work (I walk right past a drug store) and was going to take it home but couldn't resist the urge to pee on it that afternoon. It was purple before I'd finished wiping. I was going to pick up another one while I was out grocery shopping that night and just pretend the first one didn't exist, but when I got home we decided I didn't have to go shopping after all. So I showed DH the test I'd been carrying around in my pocket all day. His wonderful response? "Oh F---, Oh S---, you have to be kidding me, is this some sick joke?"

    Figures that the month that I didn't pay any attention at all to when we had sex, the month I drank pretty much a bottle of wine every night, the month I had a mammogram AND a cat scan, the month I ran out of prenatal vitamins and didn't go get any more, the month I finally bought myself some new clothes, and the month I asked my OB for a prescription for birth control pills, is when I'd get a sticky bean. The lump in my belly was officially diagnosed a couple of months later as an endometrial implant, which is when a piece of the lining of the uterus escapes the pelvis and implants elsewhere in the body. It's collateral damage from my c-section, but it's not going to affect my pregnancy or birth plans. I didn't start planning a home birth until I'd made sure of that.

    So far everything has been great. I'm having another dream pregnancy. We had a CVS test done early and baby has the correct number of chromosomes, and he's a boy despite our lack of trying for one. That actually made me kind of sad, though, because I wanted a girl. I have sisters and I wanted Tiven to have a sister. And another girl would mean they could share a room for longer and I wouldn't have to buy a whole new wardrobe for new baby. But DH is over-the-moon happy and I've come around. We're Taoist and we're all about balance, and a boy is good balance for our family. We haven't told Tiven or any other family that he's a boy, they all think we don't know. They all gave us so much crap about not finding out with Tiven, I'm just feeling like I want to keep this private, kwim? I'm doing dual care with my home birth midwives and my OB, because all prenatal care at my HMO is free under my particular plan so why not do it, and because I want them to have full & complete records if I need to transfer. I just don't like the idea of showing up and being a "stranger" especially if my midwife doesn't make it in time, like what happened with Tiven.

    A lot of people have asked about the nickname Ginger Baby. DH & I don't like the idea of naming a baby we haven't met yet, plus we haven't settled on a name anyway. We do like the idea of a nickname, something personal for our baby that isn't "the name." We had a hard time coming up with something. He liked Ox Boy but that gives away the gender, Tiven called it Fishy Baby after we told her that it lived in water. We were brainstorming one night and after hearing a couple of his ridiculous ideas like Toe Jam and Bug Spray, I said he needed to get serious and come up with something nice because this is what we're going to be calling our sweet baby for the next many months. He said ginger is sweet, and it's natural, and it grows like a weed just like a baby does. And I said, and it has a little kick to it! And that's how Ginger Baby got his name.
    David Letterman is retiring. Such great memories of watching him over the past thirty-two years!

  7. #27
    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Yesterday was Tiven's 5th birthday. She was born at 9:01pm and every year on July 1st, whenever I notice the time, I think about what I was doing on her birth day. On the way to acupuncture, having lunch with DH, going home instead of going to L&D, being ignored by the doctor in L&D, etc. I don't know why I do this to myself. The day always starts off good, kind of eager anticipation, an I know now what I didn't know then kind of thing. But then when it starts to get around 6pm and I know we were headed to the hospital, I start getting sad. And then when it gets to be 8:45pm, 8:50pm, 8:55pm, I can't keep my eyes off the clock. It's like I need to witness the passage of that time, because I couldn't on the real birth day. It's a bizarre ritual that I have to do even though I don't really want to. I'll come back to that in a bit....

    Tiven took cupcakes to school yesterday, and when she got home we let her open her gifts. We had asked for no gifts at her party over the weekend; a couple of friends brought a little something anyway, but we didn't open them. The grandparents also brought things, which we let her open after all the friends had left and it was just family sitting around. My dad gave her a "Moon in My Room," which is totally cool, and we gave her a scooter, among other things. Yesterday evening, we took her up to a local pizzeria that has a "kids happy hour" on Wednesday nights, kids get to make their own pizza. Tiven loves it but we don't do it very often so it's a real treat.

    When we got home, Tiven had a meltdown. Grandpa called and she barely talked to him and then dropped the phone on purpose instead of handing it to me so it hung up on him, and then Grammie called and she refused to talk to her at all. She started crying & screaming & refusing to go potty or brush her teeth, so I just tucked her into bed, and she was asleep within minutes. I did a bit of tidying up, a few dishes, noticed it was 8:30pm and I was still feeling good. I thought, maybe this is the year I finally get over this emotional hurdle!

    Then DH & I sat down in the living room and were talking. I was eating some ice cream and relating a conversation I'd had with my sister a few years ago about how she came to realize that her own poor decisions caused her c-section. I said that I'd said something, "not very nice, I wasn't in a good mood that day," and DH said I haven't been very nice or in a good mood for a very very long time, not just one particular day. He might have well just slapped my face, that's how it felt. I started crying, picked up my bowl of ice cream & took it to the sink, and then walked back past him into the front room for some dark & quiet. I noticed the time was 8:53pm. I sat there crying for about 5 minutes, and then walked back past DH to Tiven's room and stroked her hair and watched her sleeping for a few minutes. She is just so precious, and so worth everything I had to go through to bring her into the world, and it just makes no sense to cry on her birthday. I almost made it through her birthday this year without watching the clock and without crying, and probably would have if DH hadn't been such a jerk. Maybe next year.
    Last edited by Spacers; 07-02-2009 at 07:19 PM.
    David Letterman is retiring. Such great memories of watching him over the past thirty-two years!

  8. #28
    chevylfan
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    Why are men so clueless? I'm sorry he was a dork about that.

    I hope you kept those clothes. You'll need them soon enough.

  9. #29
    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Oh, I kept all the gender neutral stuff! I'm only getting rid of the really girly stuff -- dresses & pink & ruffles. I'm very fluid in my gender thinking, I'm a San Franciscan after all, but I still wouldn't put a pink ruffly dress on a baby boy. I'd let a teenaged boy wear that if he really wanted to and understood the ramifications, but I wouldn't do it to an innocent baby.
    David Letterman is retiring. Such great memories of watching him over the past thirty-two years!

  10. #30
    chevylfan
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacers View Post
    Oh, I kept all the gender neutral stuff! I'm only getting rid of the really girly stuff -- dresses & pink & ruffles. I'm very fluid in my gender thinking, I'm a San Franciscan after all, but I still wouldn't put a pink ruffly dress on a baby boy. I'd let a teenaged boy wear that if he really wanted to and understood the ramifications, but I wouldn't do it to an innocent baby.

    Your clothes, you goof.

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