This baby is testing me!!

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momW's picture
Joined: 09/29/09
Posts: 5634
This baby is testing me!!

And I'm sad to say that I'm not passing quite as well as I'd hope.

Just wanted to stop in and give you guys a quick update on me and LO. I have been on here, but I just can't comment on too many threads, you'll understand why here in a minute.

So, in case you've forgotten about me (I know it's been a while) I'm working for a VBA2C with a very supportive dr and putting more effort into it than I did into my 4 years of high school Biggrin

I've been having some back problems since before the pregnancy, but they have gradually gotten worse throughout the pregnancy. I'm now 29 weeks and I'm couch bound. I'm typing this while laying on the couch and I haven't been out of the house in 4 flippin days. I hear it's beautiful out *sigh* Anyway, the pain is so intense now. I keep thinking it can't get any worse and then it does. I got some Flexeril from the dr and it did nothing but make me so sleepy. Friday he prescribed me Tylenol 3 (w/ codeine). It's helping some. He's making me an appointment for an MRI, hopefully very soon!!! I don't even know what they're going to find or if they will be able to do anything so time will tell.

I also found out last week that I have GD and I have to see a specialist an hour away. Well, as of right now there's no way I can go to see her so I'm gonna have to talk to my dr about that tomorrow too.

I felt like I was giving up, but on Friday I had to ask my dr when the soonest he would do a c/s would be. I, in no way, intend to do it without a fight, but I honestly don't have much fight left in me and 11 more weeks to keep at it. He said 39 weeks or we could do an amnio at 37 weeks and if baby's lungs are okay then he would do it then. I feel like such a failure even asking him about a repeat c/s, but at this point I need to know that there is an option. I have been praying like crazy that God will not let it come to that.

I have still been trying to enjoy this part of the pregnancy where baby is really active and kicking a lot. This is usually my favorite time of pregnancy and I'm sad to say that this might have to be our last cause I can't do this again!

jooniper's picture
Joined: 08/27/07
Posts: 780

I'm so sorry it's been such a rough pregnancy! Bedrest is a pain enough without being IN pain all the time. Sounds like you have many things working against you, I don't think anyone could blame you for another c-section and it's possible that'll be the best choice for you and the baby, but hang in there! I'm rooting for you!

TiggersMommy's picture
Joined: 02/14/10
Posts: 6043

Christa, please don't feel like a failure! You don't have to convince this group that avoiding a c/s is generally the best path in a normal pregnancy. That being said, we all support that your situation more than warrants such decisions. C/s's have their place as do many medical interventions. It's their overuse in uncalled for situations that have brought us all together. Having followed you from the beginning of this pregnancy, I know that you must be in an IMMENSE amount of pain to even consider a third c/s. That much pain would make natural child birth incredibly difficult if not nearly impossible. While every woman initially approaches natural child birth for slightly different reasons and the faith that guides us to believe in our ability to do it stems from different sources, we all ultimately do it for the same reason ... to have a healthy baby and an enjoyable birth experience. If a c/s truly is the best way to achieve that ultimate goal then you needn't feel like a failure.

You are an amazing woman and an incredible mother. Big gigantic hugs :bigarmhug:

momW's picture
Joined: 09/29/09
Posts: 5634

Thanks Erin! I really appreciate the kind words. I just feel like I worked so darned hard to prepare for the VBA2C and now it's being ripped from my hands just before the finish line. I have wanted a NCB so badly with this LO and with the end so close it's all slipping away. I definitely know the most important thing for me right now is to have a healthy baby and if that means having a c/s at 37 weeks then I'm all for it. If I'm still popping Tylenol 3 pills at that point then it would be much better for baby to be out here. I'll deal with the c/s if I have to but I really hope it doesn't come to that. Heck, if I still feel anything like I do now by then there's no way I could labor on top of this. I'm so anxious to know what is wrong and if it's fixable before the end of this pregnancy. I really want so badly to enjoy the rest of the pregnancy. I guess this is God's way of teaching me not to hold too tightly to my own plans Smile

faeriecurls's picture
Joined: 06/04/08
Posts: 790

:bigarmhug: I am so sorry you are having such a rough time. There are reasons when a c-section is the best option for both baby and mom and you shouldn't feel guilty if you need a c/s. You are an educated woman who will be able to make the best choice based on the situation. You should never feel like a failure for that! I hope you get some relief soon - hang in there!

krazykat's picture
Joined: 08/11/07
Posts: 1143

Ditto what Erin said! I was just reading in Birthing from Within last night about the difference between pain and suffering. You have got to make the best decision for you and the baby. I can't imagine that your suffering will get better or go away during labor... more likely it will get worse if it hasn't eased off before then. Plus, it exhausts your body and your mind. I am really sorry you are going through this!

We are here for you and please don't feel like you have to apologize or explain yourself. I bet you the difference this time is that even if you do go with the Cesarean Birth... I bet you are 100 times more informed and aware of your choices. You don't have to "give in" to make that choice. Remember that you can still do a birth plan and have things how you would like them when the time comes. It can still be a beautiful experience.

(((BIG HUGS)))

jolly11sd's picture
Joined: 02/02/05
Posts: 3327

Christa, I'm so sorry that the meds that you got a few days back have not made a difference. I can't imagine the pain you have been suffering through. Erin's words are very well put. Don't ever feel like you are giving in. You have to do what is right for you and being in that much pain is not right. I know you have put some much work into having a VBA2C but if that ends up not being what happens you go in to your new plan a very educated person regarding the experience you want to have. Big hungs to you.