So I have been researching different methods for having this baby since in the past my plan has been to avoid c-section but definitely give me the epidural and whatever else you think I might need as far as drugs or procedures go...
I just wanted to get some feedback from BTDT moms who may have used a specific method. I have been really drawn to the Bradley Method although I feel like it might be the most dated one? I bought the book on Friday and have almost finished it. It's kind of funny because some of the things in the book REALLY date it back to the 80s. Gees Louise! I still found it very encouraging and helpful though and I feel like it could really work for us. I thought about signing up to take the 12 week classes with an instructor, but it might be hard since both DH & I would need to go together and we both work full time and he is also in school full time and we have a LO at home who would need childcare every week so that we could attend classes. I would be interested in hearing critiques on the book as well if anyone has any.
I am just wondering what others have used or did you just wing it? How did whatever you used work out for you? I am just trying to soak up as much information as I can because pretty soon I want to have my birth plan in place so I can start preparing myself for the delivery.
I haven't used it personally, but I've heard a lot of really good things about Hypnobirthing... I'm sure some of the other ladies in here will talk about it.
I'm not using any particular method, myself. I feel a bit unprepared in that fashion, but I'm also hoping that I can just trust my body and mind to cooperate with me during labor... LOL
I read the Hypnobirthing book, took an instuctor-led course, and practiced with the CDs at home. In all honesty, I felt like the only thing I got out of the course was getting DH on the same page. I researched NCB like a mad woman and even got books specifically for him. He never read them . Taking the course together made him more comfortable during our birth because he felt like he had a few things in his "toolbelt" to help me through it. I didn't get through many of the CDs. I mostly used the Rainbow relaxation CD to help me get to sleep in the last few weeks of pregnancy. That helped A LOT.
There are lots of "methods" out there and choosing one to use is hard because each caters to a different kind of woman and some help more with different kinds of births than others and you never know exactly how your birth will be until it happens. For me, I did not find the CDs helpful during labor. I didn't use anything I'd learned specifically through Hypnobirthing. I'm not the kind of woman who is easily hypnotized (I don't even believe that actual hypnosis plays a part in Hypnobirthing). What I did get out of all my preparation was a sense of confidence, a STRONG determination to stay the hell away from the hospital, and complete trust in my birth team.
You absolutely do not have to shell out $400 and attend a bunch of classes in order to have a blissful NCB. You cannot go wrong in the "method" you choose. Pick whatever appeals to you and involve your partner as much as possible. The main tenant of any method is building confidence. Read as much as you can about birth. Make sure you understand the risks of certain procedures and have a plan for what you'll do if things veer off course (for instance, have a birth plan that includes instructions should you require a c-section). But once you have all that in place, tuck it away in the back of your mind and concentrate full force on a peaceful birth. Read every uplifting NCB story you can get your hands on. Imagine yourself in the mother's place. And most of all, when labor gets started, RELAX. Not just physically but mentally in whatever way you know how. Make it your partner's responsibility to do the worrying and make sure he understands 10000% that he is not to transfer that worry and stress to you. Yes, of course, you should be informed if the baby is in danger. But you shouldn't be the one watching the clock or stressing about when to eat.
I bought and read bradley method books with my son's birth. Did research online for it. I did fine up until hour 6 of pit contractions (I was induced) and then things went downhill. Anything my husband suggested related to it did not help. I was mentally going off the wall. I felt out of control. The things I read did not help me. After so many moms on here praising hypnobabies, I'm doing their self study course right now. I already feel better than I did before my son's birth. My main desire is to stay calmer and I'm confident that hypnobabies will help me do that. Guess we'll find out in November!
I am a 'just wing it' kind of girl myself, but I do find that I get to a point during transition where I lose control of my body and start to panic a little. Lucky for me I go very fast and usually only have a few moments of feeling like that before my body gives me the signal to push (ok, it really gives me no choice), and once I have that to concentrate on I am fine again.
Mom to Arianna (5), Conner (3) and Trent (my baby)
I totally and completely agree with Erin. I did Hypnobirthing too, and while it made me feel empowered and educated and THAT got me through my NCB, it wasn't the actual tracks or tricks that did it for me. It helped me PREPARE, mainly. I think anything that helps you understand what's going on with your body, gives you a good solid way to relax and embrace childbirth, and helps your partner be a real, solid help to you is a quality NCB method.
Thanks so much for the good feedback. Just reading the responses makes me feel like I will definitely not being dragging myself to those classes since I don't really even want to take them anyway. I love this board. It's been so HELPFUL for me thus far!
We took a child birth class for our first and she talked about natural birth and also about epidurals, c-sections, etc. It gave me great info and when I heard with an epidural you typically need a catheter I decided I was shooting for natural. I made it through with just moving, and showers, and once I hit transition I knew I was close.
With my second I did Hypnobabies and I loved it, kept me calm and focused and gave me a great cue that I used with my contractions to take away the pain and to keep me calm. I think it really helped me keep my head on straight since I wound up with an unplanned/unassisted homebirth and didn't pani more than 5 seconds. I'm doing Hypnobabies again this time and it's great for keeping me relaxed while preparing for the birth and the Peace cue still works great for me with any discomfort.
You have already gotten great responses so far but I would like to put in my two cents.
With my first I tried to just wing it, after 6 hours of pit contractions I caved and got the epi. I was not prepared to deal with the intensity of the contractions. So with my second I got the bradley method book and the hypnobirthing book. I read both but the hypnobirthing drew me in more, I never took the classes either. I listened to the tracks clear through the pregnancy and mentally prepared myself for labor. Not once did I use the actually tracks while in labor. Up until I hit transition I was in complete control of the contractions and just rode through them but once transition hit I was a mess but still got my natural birth. With my third, first home birth, I used hypnobirthing again and honestly didn't listen to the tracks nearly as much but because I had experienced transition already I knew what to expect and stayed in control the whole time. My midwives didn't even realize I was in transition until my body started pushing.
That being said I know loads of women who have succesfully used bradley method and LOVED it. It just wasn't what drew me in. I love Hypnosis though. I feel it is a lot more helpful, at least for me. Because you are not just relying on touch and message to help keep you relaxed but you are programming your sub consonance to relax and keep your body relaxed as well as release your natural pain relievers. Not once in either one of my natural births did I feel "pain" other then the ring of fire with my third. My third even came out posterior and I had the dread back labor but it was never painful.
I think how someone naturally acts during labor plays a big part as far as what works. Some people love and need touch during labor where others turn very internal. Both women will respond very differently to the same approach. For me DH touching me did not help in the least bit (which he thought he was helping poor guy), which is why I'm enjoying hypnobabies. I needed that inner peace with DS's to help me think, but I wasn't able to do that. I wasn't able to listen to DH's calm suggestions because the man was making me feel worse by touching me. I just wasn't able to communication that to him other than yelling not so usefully "you're doing it wrong!!!" Adversely, I've read birth stories of women needing loving touches and even kissing during labor to help them relax.