I would like to hear opinions from you ladies on this. Maybe I'm missing something....
I definitely, definitely see a need for a doula while laboring at home. I really regret not hiring one for my last labor. But I don't really see where a doula would necessarily be useful once I get to the birth center since I'll have a MW and a nurse with me the whole time.
The rooms aren't huge and I don't know if I want so many people in there, you know?
photographer (hopefully - depending on the timing of this baby's arrival!)
My mom (possibly - depending on how she handles it)
My SIL (again, depending on the timing of baby)
DS - possibly depending on time of day
So IF my mom and SIL don't make it to the birth center for the arrival, it would be nice to have a doula, but if they do make it, then I'd had to hire a doula just to have her not do anything once we're there....
Tell me what I'm missing!
I agree that it would be really good to have one at home. But how long are you planning on waiting before going to the birth center? I mean, it's not like you have to worry about waiting til the last minutes to avoid interventions and stuff (like if you were to go to a hospital). Once you get to the birth center, how much time will the midwife and nurse be able to devote to you in non-clinical support (changing positions, massage, counterpressure, etc....)? What about if it's a complicated birth (for whatever reason)? I'm definitely not saying you need one, but that's something to think about.
Have you asked your midwife about it?
Are your mw and nurse going to provide continuous support throughout your labor like a doula? A doula will be there for you(the mom) to provide support. A mw or nurse even in a birth center most likely won't be there the entire time.
It would just depend on how many mom's they have laboring. They have 2 birthing rooms there. Usually they only have one mom at a time.
With DS, my nurse and mw was with the entire time I was at the birth center. Of course I was the only one in labor that night.
I have an appt on Wednesday so I'm going to ask. It's really just the home labor that I'm most worried about. I was at home for 6 hours with DS before heading into the BC and 3 of those hours we really, really needed someone else. Even my mom would have been helpful but I didn't want anyone around. This time if my mom is available or my SIL is down, then they can help support me.
eh, I don't know.
we didn't hire one this time around (did last time with being a first time mom wanting a natural hospital birth with an OB). we will be at a birth center so don't plan on being at home as long as with the hospital. also, DH has experience helping me whereas last time he needed some coaching from our doula, since he was a first time dad. I still considered a doula in the back of my mind, until talking to the MWs and nurses at the center. The one nurse at our childbirth class said she thinks doulas are great but she gets disappointed b/c that is all the stuff that they (the nurses) like to do
Our center is similar that they will be there for us the whole time, unless there is another couple there in labor...they have 3 birthing rooms. And I am willing to take the chance that we will have an extra set of hands at least intermittently...and DH will be better prepared this time, since we have been through it together once before.
so, yeah, i would suggest talking to the MWs/nurses to get a feel from them... but especially if you have an extra person/extra people in addition to DH, those extra people might come in handy if you don't have a doula.
Oh yes, that is also another reason we haven't hired a doula yet this time. DH is definitely excited about helping this go around. not that he wasn't last time, but he was more in shock the whole time and didn't really know how to pitch in
My only *real* concern is if baby comes before my SIL comes because then my mom will have to stay with DS unless we get some friends to watch him. My cousin is a possibility, but she's a 21 year old college student who is also a cheerleader and works 20 hours/week, so her schedule is packed as it is.
I know it'll all be perfectly fine, I just want to avoid what we did last time at home when my back labor kicked in and I really needed DH putting pressure on my back instead of fixing me something to eat, tending to the dog, packing last minute items, timing contractions, etc.
I think if you need a guaranteed person at home, and SIL or MIL is not guaranteed, then you should do it. Perhaps a student doula who is in training, they should be less expensive, so less money "wasted" if everyone else is able to be there.
Hiring a doula is a very personal decision. I obviously believe doulas are invaluable at helping mom's through labor and delivery or I wouldn't be one. That said you have to be comfortable with the idea and what they provide. Either way I hope you have a fabulous birth!
We are getting one. We are getting an apprentice so its cheap.
Last time Tim was really hands off and I feel like he didn't help me much.... so just in case he acts that way again I want someone to rub my feet, press on my back etc. Stuff that the MWs may not do. I also want her there in case my mom can't get here in time and Tim needs to mind Tyler some.
Tyler James born via c-section May 29, 2008 7lb 8 oz 20 inches
Bradley Christian born in the water April 10, 2011 8 lb 6oz 20.5 inches
Well, I have a free student doula, but it's not about the money...it's more about will she understand that I may not need her at the birth center, you know? I'm also hesitant about her because she's very, very, very opinionated and one-sided with many things she posts on FB, which is fine, b/c I like people who have an opinion....I'm just afraid she has an idea about how she wants it to go instead of how we truly need her to be, you know?
At home, I may not need her to be around me. If it's like last time, I want DH to be the one pressing on my back, rubbing me, etc. I would need her for timing contractions, making sure I have food, etc. I guess we could just talk to her instead of me assuming she won't be open to that....