I met a brand-new mom tonight
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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Default I met a brand-new mom tonight

    I'm cheating. I just copied this from my blog, I posted it on Tuesday, but thought you all might be able to relate...


    I stopped at the grocery store on my way home tonight. I noticed one family -- mom, dad, grandma, and a huge SUV-style stroller covered with two blankets -- making slow progress around the store. The mom was pushing the stroller slowly, and leaning on it almost like it was a walking aid. She was obviously having a rough evening.

    As I left the parking garage, I got stuck in traffic and saw the same family exiting the front door of the store. The mom looked absolutely exhausted, almost in tears. The dad ran after a MUNI bus but it didn't stop for him. As he came back to the mom & grandma, the mom threw up her arms and walked away from the stroller. She clutched her belly and it occured to me that she was very newly post-partum; without the stroller & exhaustion, she might have appeared to be six months pregnant.

    I made a snap decision & pulled into the handicapped parking space in front of them, rolled down my window, and said to the mom, "You look like you need a ride home." Without a word, she walked to my car & got in, leaving the dad aghast and the grandma confused. The grandma said to the dad, "I'm going with her," and got in the back seat. Dad was left to push the stroller home.

    She'd had a c-section FOUR DAYS AGO. She not only just gave birth to a baby four days ago, she also had major abdominal surgery four days ago. What the hell kind of husband & grandma let a new mom who is recovering from a c-section go out on a walk to the grocery store the day after leaving the hospital? Even if she thinks she feels up to it, she's not really. I told her so. I've had two c-sections. She needs to be putting her energy into healing, not walking around a grocery store. I turned around & wagged my finger at the grandma, "You're a mother, you should know better than to let her out of the house after what she's just been through!" I told them both that mom is to go home, get in bed, and stay there until baby is two weeks old. Let the people who care about you, care for you. Take your pain meds by the clock, stay in bed, nurse that baby, and just heal up. I gave her my phone number & email address, she wrote them on her hand. I do hope she gets in touch. I probably need to apologize to her husband for traumtizing him by practically kidnapping his wife from the grocery store.
    The number of U.S. states in which a person can marry the person they love regardless of gender: 30 and counting!

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    Good for you!

    That poor mom. She must have been completely tired, sore, exhausted. Hopefully, she (and her family) take your advice and let her get the rest and healing time she needs!

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    Posting Addict ourfirstblessing's Avatar
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    oh my goodness i cannot imagine the look on the dads face that is soooo funny! poor girl, even if she felt like being up and around i am sure she was in a lot of pain. hopefully she can get lots and lots of rest!
    ~Kristen~
    <3 Dh Jason 3/22/03
    ~Connor~ 7/26/07
    ~Isaac~ 11/20/08
    ~Colin~ 2/8/12
    Baby #4 11/24/13

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    Posting Addict Chimmy's Avatar
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    My goodness, that poor mom. I think I'm more annoyed with the grandmother than the Dad. I sure hope she gets the rest she needs
    Mama to 7 curious, wild & wonderful little ones



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    Posting Addict jolly11sd's Avatar
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    I'm glad you were able to give them a ride. That poor mom. What were they thinking dragging her to the store like that??? I agree with Chimmy, grandma of all people should have known better!
    ~Joy~ DS1-8/5/05, DS2-10/18/10 (VBAC#1), DS3- 4/11/12 (VBAC#2!)


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    Posting Addict MrsMangoBabe's Avatar
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    What were the dad and grandma thinking? The mom should have been at home resting and recovering and the four day old BABY probably should not have been out in public, especially since it is cold and flu season! Glad you stopped to help!
    -Brittany
    Doula, Childbirth Educator, and Mom to three adorable troublemakers
    Two time joyful Hypnobabies natural birthing mom
    My blog: Birth Unplugged

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    Posting Addict Starryblue702's Avatar
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    Wow... good for you, that was a very sweet thing you did. I can't believe that woman agreed to go out though! I know we never know what someone's home life/situation might be, but still. I sure hope she's now getting the care and rest that she needs and deserves. BTW... if I were that mom I would have grabbed my baby up with me and made them push an empty stroller back home!
    Krystal & Donovan - 12/2/06
    Reagan - 10/2/02
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    Trystan- 11/22/11
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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starryblue702 View Post
    BTW... if I were that mom I would have grabbed my baby up with me and made them push an empty stroller back home!
    I didn't have an infant car seat or I would have taken the baby, too. I asked if the baby was in a car seat & she said no, it was just a big stroller.

    I've gotten interesting comments on this. My SIL said, "I stopped at the mall on the way home from the hospital with [my first baby.]" This is from someone who had a nice normal not-too-long uncomplicated vaginal birth that required only one stitch to repair. If she'd had any kind of major surgery for something, or a complicated birth, then she probably wouldn't have been out grocery shopping after four days.
    Last edited by Spacers; 11-07-2011 at 01:36 PM.
    The number of U.S. states in which a person can marry the person they love regardless of gender: 30 and counting!

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    Posting Addict Nell4Him's Avatar
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    I was at the store the day after I was released, but I did not have a c-section and I'm not afraid to use the electric shopping cart if necessary.

    Good for you for stepping in and helping.
    Janelle and Brad 8-25-01
    Jacob 04-14-04
    m/c 04-16-06
    Daniel 01-09-09
    Evelyn 08-29-11


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    Super Poster kaype's Avatar
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    good for you for offering to help! and good for her for allowing you to help i hope she connects with you -- you'd be a great person to encourage her and support her.

    my husband's grandma had undiagnosed twins 50-odd years ago. she stopped on the way home from the hospital to buy the extra things she needed. as far as i know, there wasn't anything "unusual" about the babies' birth. i've only had vaginal births and i STILL can't imagine being out like she was -- or this other lady was -- with a baby that young!
    Katherine & Michael
    *Judah, born naturally 10/07
    *Sophia, born naturally 8/09
    *Liam, born naturally 1/12




    If you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go together. ~African proverb

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