Normal right?

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Last seen: 3 years 10 months ago
Joined: 01/22/07
Posts: 170
Normal right?

I'm getting a little scared I can't do it.

Those who know me know that no way in hell do I want another section and I have planned on a VBAC since before TTC but I'm getting a little bit "this baby already feels giant how I am going to grow him for two more months and then push him out"

Also my heart rate RACES at the very slightest bit of exerting myself so I am kind of scared of pushing because last time my HR shot up to the 180s.... but I think this was because they were directing my pushing and I could never fully catch my breath.

Anyhow.... do even you seasoned birthing moms get a little scared?

I am super excited to have a baby naturally and the way my body intended and feel like I can do it. The midwives are 100% "you are going to do awesome and amazing because the mental part is a big part esp in VBAC and you are totally where you need to be"....

I'm rambling but what I am saying is I want this bad.... just getting a little weird. Wink

Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I've only been through it once, but now I'm certain I CAN do it. A lot of it really is mental. Surround yourself with supportive people, read amazingly positive birth stories, find some affirmations that fit you, and you will be fine! Our bodies were made to do this. Yeah, it's not the most comfortable experience, but let me tell you, the endorphin rush you get the second that baby comes out makes all the pain go away. It's the best high.

Last seen: 9 months 5 days ago
Joined: 05/24/05
Posts: 944

Positive birth stories have been really encouraging to me in the past. Do you have Ina May's Guide to childbirth? I love reading the birth stories in the beginning of that book.

In preparing for my 1st vbac, I was absolutely convinced that my baby would come vaginally. Keep telling yourself that your body is made to birth the exact baby it is growing. If things are left to progress on their own, the odds are way way way in your favour for a vaginal birth.

Last seen: 1 year 10 months ago
Joined: 01/18/06
Posts: 1626

I can't speak from a VBAC perspective, but from a natural standpoint I can agree with Rebecca. I simply expected to give birth vaginally. I had my 'what if's' planned out early then let them go. I knew in the back of my mind there was a plan set up to keep us safe in the event of an emergency. But once I had it set up, I sent it on its way and focused on how my vaginal deliveries were going to go.

Once in the throes of it, it just happened. Force of nature.

Are you afraid of birthing a baby vaginally or is the fear more of birthing a baby vaginally after a cesarean? I think those are probably two different kinds of fears that deserve their own recognition then ultimately send them off on their way into the universe. You'll be taken care of no matter what happens. And yep, you CAN do it!! Geez, if I can do it, you can!! I cried walking myself to the dentist the other week for a check up. lol. I told the nurse (whatever they're called there, haha) that I'd rather be birthing a baby!

mandora's picture
Last seen: 4 years 2 weeks ago
Joined: 07/16/07
Posts: 262

Everything the other ladies said. Smile For the record, I've never had a VBAC client that WASN'T super nervous, so I think it's normal.

I know that even after I had DD, I was still nervous.... she was an induction and I never really had difficult contractions, once they turned the pit off and things started ACTUALLY progressing. So, I was worried that her birth was a fluke, and that Sebastien would stay in there forever. That obviously didn't happen, and in the moment I was too focused on what I HAD to do, that I didn't even think about doing it, kwim? I'm not nervous at all this time, because I've made peace with the idea that the birth is gonna go however it goes - I'm prepared, know what's best for us, have our contingency plans in place...and beyond that, that's all I can do.

I agree with the advice that you need to confront your fears, understand them, and then send them away. Figure out WHAT exactly you're afraid of, confront it, and then leave it be, so that it doesn't pop up while you're birthing.

You can do it!

mandi04's picture
Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
Joined: 08/10/03
Posts: 2272

I have birthed 3 babies vaginally and I still get nervous about birthing another one, so I'd say it's pretty normal. I actually find I'm worse off if I try to watch birthing videos while pregnant because it looks tough. But once you are there, and in the moment you do what you need to and then the baby is out and you feel wonderful. I've honestly always assumed my births would be vaginal and with my first you bet I worried about how that would work but like the others said, your body is making that baby and will be able to birth that baby.

Last seen: 3 years 10 months ago
Joined: 01/22/07
Posts: 170

Yeah I honestly think its more like first time mom fear than because I have a VBAC... I am determinined to get this baby out of my lady area! Its just the unknown I think. I am really positive about it and totally not really worried per se but that little bit of "do women really do this all the time" .... Haha.

I think I would be getting just as nervous ( or even more so with my knowledge now) if I were going in for a repeat section! I just think that now that its only two months away it seems to be getting real!!

TiggersMommy's picture
Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
Joined: 02/14/10
Posts: 6043

Kinda posting blind here ... just skimmed the replies.

I totally second reading positive birth stories. I was super confident through most of my pregnancy but I was also a bit worried that I was overly confident and that when it came down to it I'd be completely overwhelmed. Whenever I started to worry, I'd read some really beautiful birth stories and my excitement about the big day would assuage my fears. The unknowns are the scariest part of pregnancy and birth. So, balance your fears by concentrating on what you do know. You already know how amazing it is to look into your baby's eyes for the first time. You already know how amazing it feels to hold your baby for the first time. Your body knows what to do and will reward you with a flood of the most amazing mind-bending hormones.

And yes, confront your fears. Talk about them with your MW and your partner. More than anything, they are there to help you stick to your plan and to do the worrying for you. Once the plan is in place, concentrate on your natural birth and how wonderful it's going to be. I was terrified of transferring for going post-dates. DH and I set out a plan for how we'd handle having our natural birth in the hospital instead of our beloved birth center. We wrote up a separate birth plan just in case (thankfully we never had to use it :D). Once it was all out on paper, I felt better and was able to let it go.

Your birth is going to be awesome!!!! Yahoo

Ktotherystal's picture
Last seen: 4 years 9 months ago
Joined: 01/21/08
Posts: 108

I had a VBAC and I think throughout the whole pregnancy I wondered if I really could do it, but I never really didn't believe I could, if that makes sense? I really had to convince myself that this is the way babies are supposed to be born, and that my body was made to deliver a baby like this. I second reading the book Ina May's Guide to Childbirth if you haven't already. The stories in there and on this board were super empowering for me! You will do great! Trust yourself and know that it will know what to do!

Amber_daisy's picture
Last seen: 3 years 4 months ago
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 567

I haven't had a c/s and I doubt myself all the time! I think it's just normal anxiety.

BuckeyeK's picture
Last seen: 3 years 6 months ago
Joined: 10/23/06
Posts: 3087

It's normal! I agree with the others about reading positive birth stories.

One thing I really liked was my hypnobabies program - the positive affirmations and the fear clearing session. Reminding myself every day that "I can do it" with my positive affirmations track made me believe in my abiluity to birth my baby my way and overall feel very confident.

Mom2ThreeKiddos's picture
Last seen: 4 years 5 months ago
Joined: 09/15/09
Posts: 1380

Surround yourself with positive birth stories. If you haven't looked into it join a local chapter of ICAN they can be very empowering and helpful. Hypnobabies makes a wonderful birth affirmations CD that honestly I think ANY women could benefit from. They also have a specific CD for VBAC moms. You CAN do this. Believe me I understand your struggles, but I have full faith in women's bodies and I know you can do this. Hang in there!

Spacers's picture
Last seen: 9 months 1 week ago
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4104

I totally second the Hypnobabies affirmations, fear cleansing, and VBAC scripts! They also have a "pushing baby out" script to keep you comfortable, relaxed and focused on mother-directed pushing which would probably be helpful with your BP-skyrocketing-while-pushing history.