The OB Guilt Trip - Vent

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Melissa1223's picture
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The OB Guilt Trip - Vent

You know what I hate? Anything that makes a mother question how and where she wants to deliver her child for stupid reasons! Having to choose a less than desirable place to labor because of insurance and money? Craptastic! Even worse, to me, is having to weigh the pros and cons of choosing to try a home birth based on the possible hurt feelings of the medical professionals that will end up treating you if there is an emergency.

One of my biggest fears about labor this time is that I will have to transfer to the hospital and have to face the condescending attitude of my OB and the nursing staff. "Oh, SHE tried to have a baby at HOME, with a MIDWIFE. No wonder she's having suchandsuch complication, she brought it on herself." Some of the nurses at my hospital would probably be cool with it, but some of them totally would not, it would offend their delicate sensibilities for me to show up with my hippie midwife on their L&D floor.

And my OB? Oh man, I really like him in general. But apparently he had a falling out with my midwife a few years ago and now I am terrified of having to transfer back and having to deal with his hurt ego that I transfered to the midwife in the first place. That is if he would even take me back as a patient. I wonder what would happen if I got to L&D and told them my OB of choice is Dr. Jackass and he told them, "Nope, not my patient!" I suppose I would just deliver with whoever was on call at L&D that day.

Maybe I am making a bigger deal out of it than it really would be. But I really hate that on top of all the stress of BRINGING FORTH LIFE I also have to consider whether I will be treated with hostility should I require the assistance of medical professionals. I hope by the time my kids are having babies that they will feel confident that, should they choose to birth at home, they will have the full support (medical and emotional) of the medical providers in their community.

Vent over.

momW's picture
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I know that in my baby bearing years I probably won't see a change in the birthing atmosphere where normal birth is respected, midwives are seen as professionals and when you birth at home your not seen as a hippie. However, I am holding out hope that if I fight hard enough that my daughters will be able to safely birth their babies wherever they so choose and feel okay about going to an OB at a hospital if they get to the point where they need help. I'm holding out hope, but not holding my breath.