Those of you who read my birth lodge last year know that Tiven's birthday has always been a hard, emotional day for me. Every year I've watched the clock, thinking about what I was doing on her birth day at that time, and every year I've cried at 9:01pm, despite all the emotional healing work I've done. Last year I was actually feeling really good, and I only cried because DH said something nasty to me. This year, there were only two occasions where I thought, "What was I doing on her birth day at this time," and the first time it turned out to be the wrong day, LOL! Tiven wanted to stay up until "her real birthday" so we let her sit in bed with a book & flashlight, and at 9:01 we went in & sang "Happy Birthday" to her again. No tears, no wondering & what-ifs & second-guessing, and no pain. Finally, I did it! I made it through her birthday without tears.