HI I don't normally post here but I did also have a medical reason for not BFing and it was really hard on me and I am so glad to see that others have had similar issues.
My entire pregnancy I planned to BF. I never really gave it any thought, that's just how it would be. But I had a rough pregnancy. The morning (all day) sickness didn't go away after three months, or six months. At 34 weeks I was still puking five or six times a day and had only gained about eight pounds. I insisted over and over that something was wrong but my doctor was a family doctor, not an actual OB and he was a jerk and an idiot. He told me I complained too much (yes, really) and that I needed to toughen up because child birth was going to be tougher than what I'd been through to that point.
At 35 weeks I found a new doctor! He's wonderful and I hope he delivers any more kids I end up having! He believed me when I told him how much constant PAIN I was in, and I how sick I was. He pulled me out of work, and i was supposed to come in for BP checks twice a week.
At 36weeks 6 days I went to the hospital as sick as can be. They sent me home after eight hours saying that I needed to make it one more day! So at midnight I went back! At that point I was in so much pain (In my right shoulder blade) that I thought I was dying. The pain was not labor!
It turned out I had gallstones and I needed to have my gallbladder out... after so many painful tests, cat scans and ultrasounds (U/s hurts when your insides are all inflamed!) the gallstones had also caused my pancreas to be inflamed and they weren't sure about my appendix.
So labor was induced at 37 weeks and the next afternoon, Tori Beth was born (May 28 this year) and I attempted BF a little but she wasn't really hungry or interested yet. When she was three days old (we had never left the hospital) I had my gallbladder out. It's usually a bounce back quickly type thing but not three days after childbirth. I couldn't really hold my baby, too much pain. And I was on so many pain meds... I tried pumping since I couldn't hold her and to get a supply up for when I could BF, but nothing ever came out. I guess the trauma of being sick so long, having surgery so soon after, and the meds I was on dried me up.
I came to terms with it by realizing that in our case BF would not be best. I'm sure I could have pushed myself and really really tried harder but I had been so sick for so long that I believe that the energy my body could have used to make milk was better used to heal itself. My daughter needed a healthy momma more than she needed BM.
Shocking as this may be, I don't believe that BF is always best. And in our case, it wasn't. She's now five months old and eighteen pounds. She is happy, healthy and full of personality. And me? I'm happier and healthier than I was my entire pregnancy and I really belive that BF wouldn't have allowed me this time to heal both physically and mentally.
I am Ashley, single mommy to Jasmine 13 months.
I FF due to medical reasons. When DD was 2 weeks old I got a call from the pediatrician that she has a metobolic condition called Galactosemia. Her body doesn't produce the enzymes to digest Galactose which is in Lactose. She can't have any dairy products including human breastmilk. She has a mild varient form of Galactosemia, but Galactose is still deadly to her. I never would have thought that my milk could be deadly to my baby, but it is.
I bfeed the first 2 weeks then took a 6 week break and pumped to maintain supply best I could and lost it. I was able to bring in back to a FULL supply only to have to give up about a week later.
I went thru all the stages of grieving, denial depression all of it. My PPD started when I had to give up bfing. It was horrible. DD didn't want the bottle with formula in it even though she had taken in before. I mentally wasn't able to feed her formula. I cried the entire time my EX gave her the bottle for days, and I cried even harder when I had to feed her. I still don't like that I didn't get to BF, but I know it was best the my baby have the soy formula.
When I have my next baby (in a few years) I will attempt to breastfeed again.
I don't know if you would classify my story as "medical reason" or not.
DS was born at 41 weeks, by emergency c-section. His cord was wrapped around his shoulder preventing him from moving down into my pelvis. With each contraction his heartbeat slowed down. He was born weighing 9lbs 6oz. His head was 37cm around. He was a very big baby.
I left the hospital breastfeeding with confidence. I loved feeding him, and we were doing very well. He was gaining weight, and content. Then I started getting advice from everyone who visited us on how/when/where I should be feeding him. We got out of our groove, and before I knew it I was supplementing him with formula because I couldn't seem to satisfy him. I desperately wanted to BF him for at least a year. I didn't want to give him formula at all. I've always looked down at others (until now) for giving their babies formula, when BFing was available, easier and healthier. I felt like such a horrible, horrible mom for giving him formula. Our BF sessions were taking an hour, and then he'd fall asleep. An hour or two later, he'd be hungry again. DH and I couldn't do anything - go shopping, for dinner, etc. because by the time I finished feeding him, and got ready to go, it would be time to feed him again. I struggled with the decision to permanently supplement him. Then, after a night of BFing from 11pm to 5:30am straight, I decided that he would be better off with a happy mom and a full belly than being pressured to BF. I was getting angry and frustrated at my son, and all he wanted to do was eat. I couldn't provide him with what he needed.
Once we decided to supplement, Jake became so happy and content. I would BF for 40mins (20/side) and then follow up with a 4oz bottle of formula. We did this for 4 months. He started sleeping longer, and he started on a schedule where I could predict when he'd be hungry.
Then, at 4 months, I weaned him from BFing because we were starting solids (and it was already taking long enough to do BF/formula feeds). Now he's a happy, very healthy, 24lb big baby boy! He's so happy, and so am I because I made him that way.
We're happier together now that he has his bottles, and we get to spend a lot more happy time together. I know exactly when he'll want to eat, so we can actually go through an entire day without him crying to eat. I do hope to exclusively BF my next child, but if I can't I know I won't stress about it as much as I did with Jake.
Molly took to my breast immediatly...but my milk didnt come in for 5 days. She was an unplanned c-section due to breech birth. I nursed around the clock in the hospital but she screamed bloody hell because no milk was coming in.
We broke down and asked the nurse for a bottle of formula and that was the only time she slept for any length of time and wasnt fussy afterwards.
The nurses made me feel so guilty because she latched on so well, and I gave her a bottle despite that...so I continued to nurse her. When I got home I had a hard time finding a comfortable position for her as my c-section really bothered me. We were both in tears and I just wanted to feed my hungry screaming baby...Molly didnt take well to the breast after that and it turned out to be best for her as she is an aggressive eater and eats constantly...still does!
Of course I felt guilty, but she is healthy and very happy!
I'm not FF'ing yet, but will be once we adopt our son/daughter (hopefully sometime before Christmas 2006!). :D I chose not to BF because I don't want to take lactation supplements to induce milk production - it just doesn't seem natural to me. It's great that this board is so active! :D
I have no medical reason for not breastfeeding..
i just never had the urge to breastfeed..i did for maybe like a few weeks after my milk dried up but that was all.I had planned from the beginning of my pregnancy to formula feed.I just felt uncomfortable with breastfeeding and thought this way i will enjoy feeding my son better and it will be a good experience.I dont regret that i chose formula feeding from the start.
It's encouraging to hear all of your stories. I have decided to bottle-feed my beautiful baby girl, she is 8 days old. I am pumping so she is getting breastmilk, but sometimes I feel like a failure.
My decision wasn't one of medical necessity. My delivery was rather traumatic for me. My water broke at 11:00 pm on a Monday night. I called my doctor & he said to go back to bed & call when my contrcations were 5 min. apart. I slept peacefully through the night & by 9:30 the next morning I still wasn't having any contractions. My doctor told me to go to the hospital. So at 11:00 am on Tuesday morning they induced me. 19 hours & 2 failed epidurals (the 3rd one finally took) later they finally told me I could start pushing. I pushed for 2 1/2 hours. You could see her head, but she wouldn't pass throught the vagina. The doctor tried the vaccuum 3 times with no luck. So after they finally decided to deliver my daughter by section. Right after she was born they told my husband & I that she would have to stay in the NICU for at least 3 days. I wasn't able to get up to go see her for 36 hours after her birth, which meant that my husband had to bottle-feed her in the NICU. When I finally was able to go see her I started BF immediately. She seemed to be able to latch on, but my milk hadn't come in yet so she would get so frantically hungry after 20 min. we had to give her a bottle.
When we brought her home I continued to try to BF. She was latching & getting milk!! Unfortunately she was latching incorrectly and after 2 days my nipples were cracked, blistered & bleeding. I was in so much pain I became extremely anxious everytime she woke up & needed to be fed. I cried everytime I fed her, one because it hurt so much & also because I wanted nothing more than to BF.
My husband was extremely supportive through the difficult few days. We discussed the options at length & decided the most important thing is that she get the breastmilk for it's health benefits. So I decided to pump & bottle-feed. Although I cried for a day thinking that my bond with my daughter wouldn't be as strong because I didn't bring her to my breast. I realize now that isn't true at all. I am much more relaxed & happier now that I made my decision. I enjoy feeding time again.
I am afraid today might be my last day of pumping. My son is two days short of his two months b-day. I never thought I would/could give up but it has been six weeks of pain, sleep deprevation and infection non-stop. There have been only a handful of times which BF have not hurt me. The feeling of not being able to give him my breasts (so readily available) has been one of the hardest things to accept. And I never thought I would not be able to BF my child.
I have a bad start with inverted nipples. I started wearing a nipple shell to pull out my nipples one month prior to my due date. It didn't help much but was told that I shouldn't worry. I had a natural birth without any medication before, during and after the birth of my son. After my son was born, he didn't care to eat. He just wanted to sleep. He slept for 12 hours. Then I asked LC to help me with feeding. He didn't want to latch. The LC told me that it was because I put him thru a hard labour with 1hr45mins of pushing. His jaw was locked up. So I massaged his jaw and it seemed to help. But then, I could hardly squeeze a few drops of colostrums out for him to lick. I continued to use the hospital pump to pull out my nipples but I still didn't get much of anything out. So I was told to finger feed him some formula.
When I got home, I was told to keep giving him my breasts and pump. The first time after I BF and pump, I had tears streaming down my eyes the whole time I pumped because the pain was excruciating. I took 600mg Motron and still felt the pain from the pump. When I pumped, the pain and the feeling of the suction brought back some really dark feelings I have experience before. It made me felt sick to my stomach, wanted to throw up and felt dirty.
I gave him my breasts then formula for the first week. And he still cried a lot. I fed him; bottle fed him and rocked him to sleep standing up (because he didn't like me sitting down). There were times I felt that my uterus was going to drop out of my bottom. Then I tried to BF full-time the third week and felt great mentally (but physically it felt like hell). He lost 5oz when we tried to weight him at the hospital. Then the doctor started telling me that if I didn't get his weight up, he would "fell to thrive". That was a big term for any new parents. So we were back on the BF + formula again. Then I had yeast infection so bad that I could even sleep or let anything near my breasts. I bear with the pain when I fed him. There was one night I could deal with the pain and had to take another 600mg motron.
I am still trying to reconcile with the feeling of failure and guilt. I feel like I have no excuse as I don't have an exact medical condition to not BF. With all the books I have read, it kept saying that it's impossible to not have enough milk. Perhaps I am one of those who can't make enough? And the stress of pumping and bottle feed him has taken its toll on my mental and physical health. I still wonder if I could have tried harder to make more milk. I felt guilty one night when I was feeding him formula and felt I was able to enjoy him for the first time. I was able to look at his eyes and see how much he has grown without the thought of pain. It drives me nuts to think that I worked so hard for an all natural birth and can't even give him what I am told (seems to be) the simplest things I already have with me. I keep waiting for someone to tell me that six weeks of pain, anxiety and mentally distress is enough to take. Is it? I think I will have to live with that until I feel totally ok with it. Thank you so much for listening. I am glad I found this message board.
Hi everyone! I am suprised to find a website that not only acknowledges that there are certain medical reasons why a mother can't breastfeed, but also supports them. I was/am not able to breastfeed my daughter.
It started out a regular OBGYN appointment, my 35 week appointment. The doctor told me my blood pressure was elevated more than normal *it had been, but not too bad* They told me to come back in two days to see if it was still elevated. I went back, and it was 145/91. She told me that she wanted to go ahead and admit me, and to expect a baby sometime in the next 3 days. It didn't really register, I had had a perfect pregnancy, minus a little bit of morning sickness, how could this happen to me? We went over to the hospital, where they took me to my room and hooked everything up. She gave me magnesium sulfate to prevent seizing. At this point, I was really scared.
The next morning, they started the cervadol. By that night, I still wasn't dialating, and wasn't effaced. They upped the dosage, and gave me another day. I was having very mild contractions, but nothing to get excited. By the end of the second day, I was only dialated to 2 1/2 cm, and 30% effaced. They told me that they could either wait until the morning and start pitocin to try and get things going faster, or we could go with a c-section, but if we tried the pitocin, the chances of it working after 2 days with cervadol not working was extremely low, and that something might happen if we waited. We decided to go with the c-section.
The epidural didn't work, even after 4 attempts, one with morphine, so they had to put me under general anesthesia. Apparently, the birth went well, and she was born healthy.
When she was born, she didn't want to eat. I had inverted nipples, which didn't help, but she was also sleepy after having the magnesium sulfate and anesthetic. She wouldn't even eat from a bottle. Finally, when she I guess woke up, we tried getting her to latch on, but it didn't work. We tried pumping a little to pull my nipples out, didn't work. Finally, one of the nurses suggested putting a bottle nipple up to my nipple, and letting her suck on that awhile, and then put her on. Still didn't work, but she could take from the nipple. We let her stay on me with the bottle nipple over, and since the milk was coming out, and she would be swallowing, we thought she was okay *we had tried pumping, but it wouldn't pull any out* At her two month appointment, she had lost 8 oz. They told me to let her nurse longer, more frequently. She gained 10 oz, and then lost it immediately by her 1 month appointment. They told me that we were going to have to supplement. During the feedings where she would get the bottle, my milk wouldn't start building up like it should have, and instead, started decreasing really quickly. I tried pumping, and would get an ounce every day and a half or two days. I pumped every 2 hours religiously. Through cracked, sore nipples, and excruciating pain. It was horrible. The doctor told us we could start trying to nurse her again, but by that time, the milk was gone. I tried fenugreek, I tried pumping every two hours all day, waking up even through the night. Nothing seemed to work. We had to quit nursing. I consider it a medical reason, she couldn't gain weight on my milk. I don't know if it was not enough being produced, or the bottle nipple not allowing her to get it all, or what. I still feel really bad about it, especially when everywhere I look, it seems like all you hear is "if you don't breastfeed, you don't love your baby." "there are no true medical reasons for you not to be able to nurse" "breast isn't best, it's baby's birthright, and if you aren't giving your baby breastmilk, you are denying them" Makes me so sad.
WIth my first one it was a mix between choice and not being able to. I had been thinking about breastfeeding but wasnt sure and then I had my 3rd U/S and...... my little boy was Breech so the doctor brought in an LC so that she could tell me what happens to my milk with a Breech position baby. With a Breech baby your milk and even the colostrum doesnt come in until after the baby is born and sometimes it takes several weeks. So therefore I would not be able to bf until about 2-3 weeks after birth.
Of course there was a chance that he would turn on his own but there doctor didnt seem to think that it would happen, so about 3 weeks before I was due she had another US done and he was still in the same position only this time he had his hands stuck in my ribs. So I was scheduled for a Cesarian 2 weeks from my due date. But much to our suprise.... what do-ya know..... he flipped himself around and dropped into position and the very same day and 1 hour after I was to have a Cesarian he was born.
I asked to talk to a LC again and she just confirmed what I was afraid of.... I deffinatly couldnt not BF until several weeks after. So I would have to formula feed until I was able to, so.. I decided not to BF him because I didnt want to start him on formula adnt hen all of a sudden switch and start on BF so I stuck with the formula and he was a very healthy baby and he had gained about 1-1/2 lbs when we went for his 2 weeks checkup. Its really a good thing that I stuck with the formula because my milk didnt come in for about another 5 weeks after birth !!
With this baby I have decided to stick with formula feeding because I want to. I see the women in the mall that are BF and they have to stop and plop a booby out infront of all these ppl, worry about leaking and pumping so that they can work, or running home every few hours so they can feed their baby, and I just cant bring myself to do that. And I want my husband to be able to feed the baby as well. IMO I think that bottle feeding is actually better than BF.