I was dead set on breastfeeding when I was pregnant and even before. My mother exclusively bf three children (twice, two at a time, as we were only 2 1/2 years apart and bf over 2 1/2 years each) so the pressure was on.
I had a good labor and delivery but the hospital I was in was horrible. They offered no BF support and I tried but was in pain for 2 days trying to BF. My son didn't not want to each as often as they were insisiting we do it and he would bite me horribly when no milk was instantly there. To make it worse, the nurses were giving me a hard time telling me to "make a serious effort" as if I didn't care, and making me wake him with cold water! I hated every minute of breastfeeding and started to hate myself for thinking it. After sleep deprivation and PPD I made the decision to go with formula. Again I was met with nasty comments from the nurses but thankfully we were going home that day. My guilt led me to try to BF one more time a week later and although he did better, I just decided it wasn't going to work with us. BF seemed to cause an enormous rush of hormones which set of my PPD everytime not to mention headaches, I dont know if this is normal or not. In addition I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep up with the feedings as often as BF required and am returning to work soon and unsure about pumping.
I am still sturggling to find the right formula. We started on Good Start in the hospital but the pedicatrician said it wasn't the best unless you were on WIC. So we began using Enfamil Lipil but he was very constipated and screamed each time he tried to go so the ped put him on Enfamil Soy last week but I am seeing no major difference. He is 3 weeks old this week so I am hoping we get the kinks worked out soon!
Thanks for letting me vent. I am so thankful to find this board and be reassured I am not a bad uncaring mom
I really wanted to breastfeed and had planned on doing it for my son's first year...but it just didn't work out that way. I hated BF from the start. I thought that it was supposed to make me feel more bonded with my baby but it just made me start to resent my son. Then PPD hit me hard and trying to BF made me feel even worse. I switched to formula and do not regret it in the least. My son is well fed and happy...and so am I!
After (almost) 2 weeks of breastfeeding, I've decided to switch my son to forumla/bottle-feeding.. It wasn't going very well, and I was beginning to hate it.. I didn't feel that "bond" like some mom's talk about.. I felt exactly the same when I fed him out of the bottle as I did when he was on my breast.. He's sleeping so much better now, and I feel better knowing he's well fed... I may pump for a little while longer, I haven't decided yet.. Regardless, I'm happy with my decision..
In a way i feel bad for giving up so easy. My babys only 5days old. In the hospital they were telling me she had a great latch was a natural sucker, lol. But it seemed that she would nurse for 45min sleep for 10-20 and then nurse again for 30-45min. so the nurse suggested giving her some formula to top her off. Well that worked for a day, kept doing that after and she still wasnt sleeping and was fussy. Just yesterday i decided that forumla might work better on its own. She was up from like noon till around 5 or 6 with just little cat naps that lasted 10mins maybe. I wanted to pull my hair out, nothing i was doing was helping. So i gave her formula and she had a nice nap, kinda off adn on. then bath time and i gave her formula last night b4 we crawled in, and i litteraly jumped out of bed to check on her because she slept so good and hadnt woken up. A health nurse is comming by today to talk with us, i just hope i can get her to understand my reasoning and not come off as selfish only 5days into this. In the end though my baby seems happier.
I made the decision to exclusively formula feed yesterday. I was having major problems with breastfeeding - because of some issues of abuse from my childhood. I tried so very hard for two weeks to stick it out, but at the end, realized that it was just too traumatic for me and too frustrating for my son. He would sense my mood and wail and refuse to latch. It was heartbreaking. We have been doing all formula for about 36 hours now, and it's amazing to me what a different atmosphere is in the house! We're ALL so much happier, more relaxed and laugh and smile so much more. I don't feel like I have something to dread every waking moment. I can actually ENJOY feeding my son, and that to me, is the most important thing. I want him to be healthy and happy, and I want the same for me too.
The time I gave birth I always find it difficult to breastfeed my son. The nurses told me that my breasts' nipples are too small, baby cant find it. But then the hospital are real breastfeeding advocates. I was caught feeding my babies with bottles so they confiscated the bottles and I was forced to breastfeed him. We got discharged and I started feeding him with formula again. He had loose bowel movements and then again I was forced to breastfeed.
Time comes when I need to go back to work. So in back to bottle feeding again!
i chose to take the medication that will allow me to still be alive when my daughter is graduating and getting married etc., and I have taken a LOT of crap about it from people who, when I decline to tell them my medical condition, decide I am 'selfish' or even 'lazy' (which is FUNNY because I have breastfed my other two children and I can tell you, formula feeding is MUCH more work!).
Remember no body HAS to divulge their 'reasons of their own"- it may be just discomfort (a valid reason if it's YOUR discomfort, YOUR breasts and YOUR baby), but it may be cancer. You really never know, and I've seen so many mothers get abused on this site for not breastfeeding it breaks my heart.
My son had a very difficult time BF when he was born. I tried for over a month because I thought I had to or he would not be a healthy baby. All that would happen is that I would be so mad that he couldn't latch on and BF that I would be crying and he would be crying and I would end up storming off so mad at my beautiful little boy. So I finally came to the conclusion that no matter what anyone said BF was not for me. Getting that angry over something that I couldn't control wasn't the best option for me.