Interesting dilemma- WWYD?

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indianajones's picture
Joined: 01/21/07
Posts: 1486
Interesting dilemma- WWYD?

My 5 year old had her bestie over for a sleepover last night. They've been buddies since they were in the same daycare classroom as 2 year olds.

Bestie mentioned a couple times that her parents don't believe in Jesus but that she does. I asked her where she learned about Jesus, and she said from her grandparents. DD asked if Bestie could go to church with us this morning and Bestie said she isn't allowed.

One of the bedtime stories last night happened to be a children's book about Easter (which I wasn't sure if I should read to them, knowing her parents don't go to church).

Would you do anything? Say anything? I don't want to tick off her parents by teaching her anything, but she also seems like she wants to know more. The girls get together for playdates about once a month.

MissyJ's picture
Joined: 01/31/02
Posts: 3207

I would not take her to church with you without the parents' permission. Just as I would expect our wishes regarding our children to be respected, I believe other parents have that right as well.

*IF* she was staying over at a time when you would be attending Mass (either Saturday night or Sunday morning), I would ask them just as I would for any friend that was either of different belief system (or that I was unsure of.) An example of how I handled in the past: "Ben (my child) is really excited to have Tommy over this weekend. We attend Mass on Sunday morning and Tommy has expressed to Ben that he'd like to go. I wanted to be certain that would be OK with you or if you would like to make arrangements to pick him up early?"

The three things that I would try to convey are:

1)you are respecting their having the final say

2)that their child has expressed an interest

3)that we are not missing Mass to accommodate their choice

If the answer is no... so be it. I would just make certain that future sleepovers are on Friday night or remind them if she was staying over on a Saturday that we are attending Mass on Sunday. I'd share that the child is welcome and we'd still have lunch/playtime after -- or they can pick them up. Smile

As for other things -- like saying prayers before meals / bedtime? I would not alter for my family as it is part of our routine. Our non-Catholic friends / family that are at our home during those times are welcome to participate or simply opt out as they wish.

HTH!
~Missy

SoCaliLover's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 1591

I'm jumping in late as I have been MIA due to work lately. Missy has some GREAT ideas and I totally agree that it is important to respect the other parent's beliefs as we want our beliefs to be respected. With my older DD we had a few similar issues and handled it much the same.