I survived my first Thanksgiving without him. I spent the weekend with my family. Now for Christmas. I know I'll get through this month. I have no choice.
Jennie mom to Jordan 1/01 and JD 3/03
Married Best friend James 6/27/92, lost him 8/4/04
firsts are the hardest
My Guardian Spirit Richard 03/18/57 - 02/18/01
"Life is hard, it's harder if you're stupid"
well the 4 month mark was Saturday. I took the kids out and got a Christmas tree. I am still trying to keep things as "normal" as I can.
And I still feel like I just want to scream. There are times when the kids are yelling and screaming and running through the house and the dog is playing with the kids and the TV is too loud and the cat is constantly underfoot and I feel like my head is just going to explode. I have some friends that are SAHM, but they don't get it. When DH comes home at theend of their day they can hand the kids off to him and make dinner, fold some laundry, go shopping, take a shower, anything. Half the time I feel blessed that I can stay home and take care of the kids, at other times I just feel totaly trapped. I hate asking my neighbors to come over to watch the kids for me so I can go grocery shopping and have some "down time".
It's 10:30 and the kids finaly went down arround 8:30. Jordan woke up screaming at 10 because her knee hurt. I tried to get her to take some Tylenol and she was just screaming and kicking at me. She and JD share a room and I was more worried about her waking him up and me having to deal with 2 screaming crying kids to get back down than her knee. I got her an ice pack and she has been quiet for the last 15 min. Hopefuly she is asleep.
Both the kids come into my bed at some point in the night now. I don't sleep when they are in there with me, I keep waking up every time one of them moves. I am dead on my feet. No wonder I am ready to explode.
I should get to bed now.
thanks for letting me whine.
Ricky sleeps with me most nights. I've only just recently gotten him to sleep in his own bed. I hear ya on the sleepless nights; last night was bad. He kept wacking me with his flailing arms.
Don't be afraid to ask for help. Your friends want to help; often they don't know how to until you ask. And yes, you need down time too (I was like that but I worked, so that was my down time-just don't tell my boss ).