My husband's eulogy
I just wanted to share the eulogy I gave at my dh's funeral. Thought it might give you some insight on the man he was:
He probably would have wanted me to start off with a joke today, but unfortunately the only jokes I can remember are not appropriate for today.
He use to wake me up at night and tell me a joke. I'd wake up not exactly sure what was going on, he'd tell me the joke and I'd fall asleep again. He eventually realized why he wasn't getting a laugh out of me at 4 o'clock in the morning and he then told me the jokes the next morning. Sometimes he would call me at work and have my laugh of the day. If it was a little shocking, he would say "I'm not responsible for it, they just come to me in my sleep."
The first time I saw Richard was before I even met him. I was sitting in a restaurant and noticed a famous person at a table. Then I noticed a very tall man stand up and I thought, wow that guy's tall. And he's pretty cute. I mentioned that to him later when we were dating, when I found out he knew this famous person.. We both thought that it was an incredible thing that we saw each other before we even met.
I remember his first words to me when I met him. "Are you Deborah?" he asked me. He used to say to people: "I'm not very good with names. What did I say my name was?"
Afterwards, when we started falling in love we used to go to dinner and just stare deeply into each others eyes. He would clear the table a little just so he could hold my hand. And he would call me his Teres, his sweet sweet Teres. And Treesy. He gave me that nickname and I will cherish it forever.
Richard was an excitable guy. When he first asked me to marry him he was so excited everybody else in the office knew before I did. Then we had to work late and he excitedly told me that he had something to show me, but I couldn't see it right away. He dragged me into the front of the office. This was at 1 am you have to keep in mind. I saw a glimmer of something, but I really didn't have a clue as to what it was. Then he dragged me into the men's room where there was more light. I'd never been in a men's room before and for some reason he had turned the light off. He was just so very excited. I still didn't have a clue. Then we went back to his office and we started talking about a cost report that we were working on. Then he leaned over the desk, took my hand and said, "Teres, will you honour me and be my wife?" And I said yes.
When we got married, it was just me, Richard and TweetyBird (a 5 foot tweety bird he had bought for Robby). He cried all the way through the ceremony. I was afraid he wouldn't be able to say "I do".
But he was always so very sensitive. We used to talk about how we could feel each others emotions. You see we are soulmates. The best gift we ever gave each other was understanding and love. If either one of us were feeling out of sorts, we could just hold each other and make it all go away. Even if it were for a minute and then the world imposed again. That minute of heaven we always had for each other kept us going through the years.
When our dear son Richard Lawrence was born, he was a child borne from the greatest love. At first I was going to go through the pain, no drugs no nothing. But Richard knew my limitations and he talked me into an epidural. Good thing too. He was 9lb 5 oz! Richard knew how that would hurt. And he was there when I pushed this little "butterball" out. He was there for me through the pain and made sure there was no heartache. And we have a beautiful baby boy. A lot of it due to my sweet husband.
Richard was a devoted father to the core. I remember my first day at work with him when Robby was still very young. He showed me so proudly a picture of his son in his "shmengie outfit" he use to call it. You know, "Yosh and Josh Shmengie". Robby was the apple of his eye. He wanted Robby to excel as he did and go to university and learn for himself. Already he was teaching Robby to think for himself. To understand the power of knowledge. I hope Robby cherishes those lessons as I do and I will teach Ricky what his father would have taught him.
Richard was always prepared for this eventuality. He had often said to me: probably to comfort me should it happen, "if I die today, I've led a hundred lives." And it's true. How many people do you know who've been a son, a pizza delivery boy, a shipper, a university student, a butler, a punk rocker, a rocker, a husband, a restauranteur, a manager, a sports journalist, an assistant production accountant, a father, a production accountant, a comptroller, and the most important profession: a stay-at-home-dad.
So good night my sweet prince, good night, and may our souls intertwine again. I'll see you in the next life.
What a wonderful man. what you wrote took courage and fortitude. what a beautiful tribute to your soul mate. I am sure your loss is a cavern of the size of the ocean, but your loving memories float you to the top and hug you like the sun.