Where do I turn

5 posts / 0 new
Last post
Joined: 07/24/07
Posts: 1
Where do I turn

My story is long. I will try to make it short. In a nutshell...

My dad turned 50 in June. He was diagnosed iwth cancer of the lungs when our baby was 1 week old. He died exactly 2 months later. On my 30th birthday no less. They gave him approx 1 year he lasted 2 months. I secretly think there is more to it than is beign told. He was married to his wife for 8 months. I have always been daddys girl. I'm seriously thinking I need therapy or admitted to a psych hospital. I go on these screaming and crying to where I am hysterical and hyperventilating with the urge to run from myself thinking he's going to call or come through the door. But I know he's not. I get so sick I literally throw up. I have all these things of his around the house. I really just need to talk to someone. I can't hardly put it online how I REALLY feel for fear someone I know will see it and things get back to one place or another and people start fighting. I just feel alone and not comfortable with the whole thing.

Would you bug bomb a house if someone had cancer there? And was on radiation and chemo? 3 days later he would die? Is that normal.

i'm a hysterical person. WHAT DO I DO. I have no dad, he's gone. Who am I goign to call, who am I going to run to, look up to. WHAT DO I DO. WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT, oh god I need help.

rickydiculous's picture
Joined: 02/14/02
Posts: 140

:bighug: Have you sought any counselling? When my DH passed, it was counselling that kept me sane, and probably saved my life. When one experiences a profound loss, a grief counsellor is definitely beneficial. And he/she may be able to help you answer the questions you have.

Feel free to PM me if you want to speak privately.

JoyceLee's picture
Joined: 05/23/07
Posts: 4

Im so sorry about your dad. My dad and I were also close and he has been gone for 5 years now. I would cry everyday because I missed him so much. It may help you to talk to a counselor. It does get easier to deal with over time. I hope you feel better soon.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am so sorry for your loss. My dad and mom died 10 years apart from eachother. My mom in 1987 and my dad in 1997. I was very close to my dad. I helped him through his chemo and was his caregiver. I was also with him when he took his last breath. It does get easier, however I just lost my daughter to a m/c and all the loss feelings have flooded back to me. I miss them more now then ever before. I am in counseling and on medication for anxiety and depression. You really should find someone to talk to it may help.
I am thinking about you.

Joined: 06/27/09
Posts: 50

I m so sorry for your loss. I think its horrible loss for you because we love our parents. I know you can't forget your father. My friend's mother died with cancer and hes also suffer from same situation like you.
I tried to console him but hes crying all the time. I also suggest you for be strong and move on because life is very long and don't be depressed. My prayers with you.
May God bless you.