Where do you draw the line?

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KatieWillis's picture
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Where do you draw the line?

Ryken is driving me crazy lately with the whining and 'needing' things. He's constantly needing something. He'll realizes he needs his orange monster truck and we have to find it NOW. He'll whine the entire time until we find it. Or when he goes to bed or naps he needs to have both his basketballs, puppy, soccer ball, orange monster truck, and blue monster truck. So we go searching around for all of these things before bed each night. Or while watching TV he will demand to watch something else. We have Netflix, so I can change it to what he wants but it gets old changing it and sometimes I can't understand what he wants and then he throws a fit. Same with wanting to eat. If he wants a snack he'll whine and whine.

Anyway, you get the point. I have been giving in to most things because I figured it's not that big of deal, but it seems to be getting out of control and he whines all day long. I've banned toys from the car because he would drop them and then expect me to pick them up (while driving!). Then when I tell him no he screams the rest of the car ride.

What do you give in to and when do you put your foot down? I think I need to find a happy medium.

VixB's picture
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OMG!!!! You are describing Hunter!!! Everything you wrote, Hunter does!! He wants to listen to a certain episode of Toopy and Binoo and if I don't have it on PVR it's the end of the world. He wants a certain toy and we have to look for it everywhere or he won't stop asking for it (screaming for it)!~!
Sorry I have no solution really but just wanted to say I'm in the same boat as you.:rolleyes:

rubber_da_glove's picture
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Hmm...maybe I'm harsh but as soon as Alexander starts whining he gets punished. Not like time out or a smack...erm..eg: If he drops his toy in the car and wants it back then he has to wait. If he moans then he doesn't get the car back for that day. If he has a full blown melt down I take more toys off him when we get home. If it carries on THEN he goes in time out.

This hasn't happened for a LONG time as he quickly learned. Now he will drop his toy and ask for it and when I say he can't have it right now he just says "rorry (sorry) mummy". He hasn't actually whined about anything in ages...probably because I'm mean Lol

I think it's a normal part of being 2. Just seeing how far they can test you before you give in :bighug:

jbraud55's picture
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At least you don't have two of them. Sad

Dalton isn't as bad but Gavin is very whiney.

MandyMommyto1's picture
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Claire does this to...I think it's a pretty normal thing for this age.
My strategy - if you can call it that, is to give her what she wants the first time she asks, if she keeps whining, I give her a warning (like, if you keep doing that I'm taking it away - or something like that) and then if she keeps whining, it's a NO and I don't budge. To be perfectly honest, it doesn't always work, but I'm hoping if I stay consistent then eventually she'll get the idea.
Unfortunately you're just going to have to deal with the screaming in the car until he learns Sad I turn up the music so I can't hear her, or I play her an audio book - The Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast are her favourites right now.

haysmama's picture
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Classic 2.5 year old!! Kate is EXACTLY the same way. If she starts whining I try to explain why I'm not giving her what she wants or tell her I will do it in just a minute. If she continues I will usually just say something like, "I'm sorry, but I already told you ..etc..." Then I just ignore. Usually she will cry for a minute then move on. If the crying escalates I threaten a time out. But I could have totally written that post about Kate, substituting baby dolls for monster trucks. Smile

KatieWillis's picture
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Thanks ladies! I'm glad to hear that it's normal Biggrin Today I've started to ignore all whining and he doesn't get something until he says please. I actually think he's already catching on. I need to be more consistent with timeouts too.

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You could have written that post about Lily! I'm like you, I think I've been giving in too much. I've been trying to do a better job about ignoring her if she is being too whiney and also making her say please and ask nicely before I will give her something. It works sometimes. I need to be more consistent.

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I will bring D&G to their room if the keep going with the crying and tell them not to come out until they are done crying. I usually have to bring them back a couple times, but it works. One of our big problems is the whining or fight usually starts because one took the other ones toy or has a truck that the other one can't live without that day. It's so frustrating.

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When Liberty does this I try and distract her with something else. It actually works most of the time, and I thank God because if it didn't, I'd be pulling my hair out lol! I'll pick her up (which isn't so easy anymore, especially since I'm pregnant again!) and say, "lets go put your movie on," or "where's your other baby?" Anything I can do to keep the peace!