Meeting with a doula today

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Jenn0113's picture
Joined: 03/09/07
Posts: 5335
Meeting with a doula today

I am meeting with a doula today to talk over my VBAC vs Csection concerns. I really have no idea what to expect or what we will talk about and I was hoping you guys could help me get a list of questions together that would be helpful for me to have the answer to. I have never worked with a doula or midwife and I have no idea what to expect. She has told me to get on my hands and knees for 30 minutes a day to make sure the baby is in a good position. I think she has other tips for me as well that she will share tonight.

I told her that my OB said I have a 60% chance of a VBAC and she said she believes I have a 95% chance.

So - anyone have anything I could ask her to help me have a successful VBAC?

_Jessicah_'s picture
Joined: 04/21/11
Posts: 1973

I have no advice just wanted to say that I hope you can get some encouragement from the Doula. I know how much you want a VBAC and it seems like the OB is a bit wishy washy when it comes to this from what you've posted. Maybe once she gets there she will start talking and the conversation will just open up.

Jenn0113's picture
Joined: 03/09/07
Posts: 5335

Thanks Jessicah. I think you are right, I'm sure she has enough to tell me that I don't need to pre-plan the conversation, I'm just worried about wasting her time.

lesleynka's picture
Joined: 04/26/11
Posts: 1845

So how did the meeting go? Any inspiring words or thoughts from her? Are you going to use her?

Starryblue702's picture
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454

Like Jessicah, I have no advice to offer, but I certainly hope everything goes your way and you can get that VBAC that I know you're wanting!!

Jenn0113's picture
Joined: 03/09/07
Posts: 5335

"lesleynka" wrote:

So how did the meeting go? Any inspiring words or thoughts from her? Are you going to use her?

We ended up with a phone call because her sitter had to cancel. It was a good talk and even though she usually requires her clients to do a 7 week training course with her before she will assist them, she offered to be with me and do a 1 day, 6 hour class. And she said if I go into labor in the mean time to call her and she will help me anyway. I have to decide if I am going to use her or not though.

With all these balls up in the air I feel like I can't make a solid decision. Do I hire her, train with her, spend my time and hers preparing and then get to the hospital with no VBAC doc and go straight to a csection? That seems like a huge waste and I would feel so bad.

Before she will fully agree to do it she says I have to decide 100% that I will VBAC and I need to cancel my csection date. My dh doesn't want me to cancel the csection because he has seen how bad some days are for me and he wants me to be able to just get the csection if I feel like I really need it.

She told me how I should be sitting and what I can be doing now to try to get the baby into the right position. She told me to start Evening Primrose Oil - 2 capsules in the morning and evening and then pour 2 capsules "in" every day as well. She said they normally take 2-3 weeks to work but it can't hurt to try it. She said to have sex, eat spicy food and walk.

So right now I am still in limbo. Dh and the OB aren't really supporting me and honestly without DH being gung ho about it I really don't see myself being successful.

Starryblue702's picture
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454

What about trying a VBAC without the doula? I know doulas sound really amazing, but especially after this last experience having a baby (it was my easiest delivery yet, I basically laid there resting for about two hours then pushed once and he was out lol... and I did have an epi, BTW). IDK, you have to do whatever is best for you, but I would definitely suggest trying for the VBAC either way, and then decide if you feel that you need the support of a doula there with you on that route.

jennifer1980's picture
Joined: 08/16/07
Posts: 15

Jen, I am in the same boat as you!! I saw your posts on here and the Birthing Naturally and VBAC Boards.

I'm currently 36 weeks along with my second baby, a girl. I had a c/s with my first baby (he was 9lb 4oz and stop descending after 14hrs of induced labor. As of now I am STILL unsure whether to just schedule a repeat c/s or wait it out and try to go into labor on my own. My doctor is open to a VBAC but the other doctors in her practice are not... so if she happens to not be on call then all my plans will be for naught! She told me I have about a 65% chance of a successful VBAC.. but I she won't induce and she said the people who tend to have the most successful VBACs are the ones who do it without pain meds (because the meds tend to slow down your progress).

SO... I have been reading books and talking to some doulas in order to mentally prepare myself for a natural birth. My DH doesn't want a doula or a home birth and he is committed to helping me through the labor himself.. For awhile I thought I'd need a doula for her experience, etc .. but I think of this as his birth too and he totally understands my goals so I think we'll be fine just the two of us. I've kept him informed of all the info in the books about having to move around in different positions, helping me breathe, and making sure to not let me cave if I ask for pain meds (my doc wants me to get as far along as I can without them.. she said if I can make it to 7/8 cm then I could get the epi.. but I don't want my mind to even go there lol!)...

Anyway... I'm going to start having lots of sex in hopes of inducing myself. My doc doesn't want me to go past 40 weeks. My c/s would be 3 weeks from now if I chose to schedule it... it's so tempting but I keep telling myself the reasons I don't want another c/s. The recovery is my main thing.... not being able to play with my son, breastfeeding will be harder, can't exercise for longer... so many reasons. But at the end of the day we will have healthy baby girls in our arms so I think that's all that really matters.

I just wanted to let you know I'm the same boat. Glad I came across your posts.. I was very active on these boards about 3 years ago when I was TTC but during this pg have mostly just lurked! Best of luck and keep me posted... I can't wait to see how your birth goes... the unpredictability of mine is killing me! Smile

Jenn0113's picture
Joined: 03/09/07
Posts: 5335

Jen - sounds like we are in the exact same boat. I have my 38w appt tomorrow and my family is asking what I would do if he agreed to do the csection tomorrow. Heck, I have no idea. I'm miserable. Its almost midnight and I'm up and wide awake because it just hurts to dang bad to try to sleep. I'm in so much pain all over that I'd rather stay awake all night until I just pass out. Pathetic.

I still have no idea what I will do but it would be so nice to have a plan. Right now I still have my csection on Dec 27th and as horrible as I feel now I am not ready to cancel it in hopes of a VBAC.

Good luck to you too, I hope you come back and tell me what happens.