Thread: nursing a 2.5 yr old and feeling alone...

DD just hit 30 months. nobody from our BB is still nursing. nobody i know in real life has nursed this long. i've seen ONE mom at LLL nursing a child this big. everyone tells me how great it is, but nobody else has done it!

We're actually tandem nursing DS who is 5 months old as well. and i'm actually very OK with it all. but its been quite hot lately, and DD throws fits if i try to make her wait until DS is done so i don't overheat and so i can keep both kids in comfortable positions..... i'm just feeling alone because weaning isnt the answer, but its the only suggestion i get from anyone when i dont know what to do about DD's fits. she'd do it if she wanted a bath and i said no, or if she wanted candy and i said later, but it is usually with nursing because she wants it, and she's usually tired or in need of comfort and later is not an option in her head.

I'm sorry that I don't have any advice, but big hugs to you!

I nursed my oldest for 33 months. I tandem nursed 7 months. I nevvvvvvvvvvvver thought she'd give it up, but she just woke up one day and never asked again. I could never bribe her with other stuff or change her mind. One thing I did do was started letting her latch on, then I'd count to 30 and tell her "okay, that's enough..now let's do...xyz" I gradually decreased the amount of time until she basically would latch and I would say "okay, that's enough" and she'd be happy with it.
I think I was the last on my birth board nursing too. She'll stop when she's ready. I know it's tiring though.

I'm sorry you feel so unsupported. Unfortunately it is the age of tantrums. I like Annmarie's ideas. I'm tandem nursing babies of the same age, so its different, because when one is demanding, I really can't say no to the other, just too young to understand yet. But I have become adept at tandem nursing. Its not the sweet snuggly positioning I used with my singletons, but it works nonetheless. Hugs!

In our city there is a special toddler/tandem LLL group (only one in our large metropolitan area, where there are typical LLL groups in about 5 suburbs). The toddler/tandem group meets once a month - it sounds like that kind of thing might be helpful to you. You could also try calling around to local LC/hospitals and see if they know of any similar group if your LLL leader doesn't know of any.

Hang in there!

No advice, but big hugs! What an amazing accomplishment! I'm sure that "weaning" is the easy answer for most people, but that doesn't make it the "right" answer for you! Hopefully you can find a way to deal with the tantrums that work and continue your nursing relationship as long as is best for all of you!

Lurking from the BB she speaks of.

I'm sorry you were/are feeling so unsupported. I applaud your length of BFing! Daniel had his last nursing session about 2 weeks after he turned 1. I was sad to see it go, but relieved at the same time to have my body back. I was back to such a small cup size I really don't know if he was getting anything out of me anyway. I had no physical pain when he was done. It was a comfortable wean, but I was still sad about it.

Currently, I'm due for baby #3 pretty soon. This last week I've had times when Daniel is crying because he's tired and not getting his way with something and I honestly have had to stop myself from lifting my shirt to comfort nurse him. It's been about 20 months since he last nursed and I'm not sure he'd know what to do with it anyway. DH wouldn't find it appropriate, either.

Anyway, I have no experience with tandem nursing, but wanted to offer you a little love from Ellie's BB.

I feel like I am in a similar situation as you except that I haven't tandemed nursed! My son is 23 months and I am still happily breastfeeding him but most people don't know because I don't breastfeed in public anymore. Just my family and close friends know but still I get annoying comments. My grandma likes to say "you couldn't start nursing your daughter now you can't stop nursing your son." The most annyoing comment is "weren't you suppose to stop nursing when he turned 1 years old." I agree that I also comfort nurse too! He is my last baby and if it makes him happy then I will let him nurse. I don't know many moms here who have breastfed a 2 year old either but I it works for us so I keep going. You should be soo proud to keep breastfeeding both of your kids and just know that we are here if you need some support

Cool story: I joined a "crunchy" moms group when I was pregnant with my son and they believed in breastfeeing until 3-4 years old and birthing naturally at home. So here I come having not been able to breastfeed my daughter and having a hospital birth with an epidural. My kids are 19 months apart so they asked if I would be tandem nursing and I didn't even know what they meant by that. They were really supportive of me wanting to breastfeed and also trying to give birth naturally. I moved away before seeing them again but I feel like they would be soo proud of me because I did give birth unmedicated and I am still breastfeeding almost 2 years!

I'm still nursing my 2 year and 3 month old. I believe in self weaning, and his 'self' is not ready to wean! I am still happy to nurse him, as it's only 2-3x a day now, and all at home so I don't have to see any disapproving looks or hear any comments. My other 2 weaned themselves around 18/19 months. On our bb we still have 3 nursing moms. (May 09)

As far as your tantrum problem, could you maybe make a box or basket of new or special toys, (even dollar store stuff), that your dd hasn't seen before but will interest her. Tell her that it's for her to use while you're nursing the baby only, and after he's finished, you put away the box and it's her turn. That way she has something to look forward to while you're nursing ds, and her attention is diverted for awhile.

GL!

I'm starting to feel the same way and Ava is only 17 months old- even my DH is saying things like "How long do you plan on bf'ing?" to which I always remind him "2 years and then we'll see what she wants". Its starting to really piss me off though- no advice just wanted to tell you that I feel your pain- people just assume when baby hits 12 months nursing stops My doc tried prescribing a medication that was a BIG no no earlier this week- when I reminded her that I am still bf'ing she was shocked- especially when I told her Ava still nurses 5x-6x a day