College student wins restraining order re: "helicopter parents"
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Thread: College student wins restraining order re: "helicopter parents"

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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Default College student wins restraining order re: "helicopter parents"

    A 21-year-old theatre student has obtained a civil stalking restraining order against her parents after convincing a judge that they attempt to control all aspects of her daily life.

    Aubrey Ireland is a gifted theatre major at the College-Conservatory of Music at the University of Cincinnati, often winning major roles in her school's musicals. Her latest win wasn't at her prestigious music conservatory, but in court after she filed a civil stalking order against her parents. Earlier this month, Common Pleas Court Judge Jody Luebbers ruled in her favor, ordering that her parents must stay at least 500 feet from their only child until September 2013.

    "They basically thought that they were paying for my college tuition and living expenses that they could tell me what to do who to hang out with ... basically control all of my daily life," Ireland told ABC News.

    The dean's list student's complaints against her parents began when she realized they'd installed monitoring software on her computer and her phone. They paid unannounced visits, traveling 600 miles from their home in Kansas, to meet with Aubrey's department head.

    They also accused their daughter of promiscuity, doing drugs, and having mental issues to the point where they were considering going to court to order that she get treatment.

    "My mom has always been very overly involved," Ireland said. "I would have to get on Skype all the time to show them that I was in my dorm room, or there were nights I had to leave my Skype on all night and my mom would watch me basically sleep."

    She claims her parents, David and Julie Ireland, have been diagnosed with co-dependency disorder. Her parents, however, say their daughter is just a good actor, and is lying. They said she is "an only child who has been catered to all her life."

    Because Aubrey has cut all ties with them in a very public way, they now want a refund of the $66,000 they've already paid toward her education.

    "We're not bothering her," Julie Ireland said. "We're not a problem."

    But Aubrey said that taking the issue to court was a last resort.

    "I never wanted this to happen, that's the last thing I wanted," she said. "But I wasn't in control of my life at all anymore. I knew that they were holding me back emotionally, mentally, and professionally and that it got to the point where that was basically my last option.

    Psychologists say boundaries can be tricky for parents with college-age children.

    "I have no idea whether she is mentally ill, nor if the parents have any problems that may lead to the type of behavior that is described," Dr. Gail Wyatt told ABC News.

    "What do you do when a person is 21 and you're still concerned about the well being of your child? If your child has a mental health problem you are still responsible for that child, even though they are 21 years old or 25 years old."
    College Student Wins Stalking Order Against Parents - Yahoo!

    Your thoughts?
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    I think they're all nuts. But she will have to stop taking their money if she wants them out of her life.

    The parents sound wacko.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacers View Post
    If the daughter had mental health issues they should have proved that in court. Since they apparently failed to do so then they need to cut her some serious slack and get a better pasttime. I think it is rotten they are holding the college tuition over her in order to control her. So if these are the facts of the case ( and it is always hard to truly tell in one article presenting most weight on the daughter's side ) then they need to chill out and get some help themselves etc.
    Aisha

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    It is hard to form a judgement without all the facts in this case. I am guessing that they are both at fault.

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    guessing they are both at fault to an extent. I would hate to see the parents get a refund though. If they want to stop financial support that is good, but dont go retroactive in their support
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    If it's true that she had to leave Skype on all night so they could make sure she was sleeping in her dorm room - YIKES. They sound like psychos to me. Assuming what the daughter says is true, I only see two ways how this is "her fault." A) Indulging it until now - for example, actually turning on Skype in her room so they can see her there, although I think that if she was raised this way, it would be hard for her to all of the sudden start defying them and B) taking their money in the first place for college when they are such controlling psychos, although again, I think that when you're young it's easy to make those kinds of mistakes because she was probably raised to be very dependent on them.

    I can buy it. DH teaches juniors and seniors in high school, and he has a couple of parents that are way too involved. I know you may be saying "how can a parent be too involved in their minor child's education?" Trust me, some are.
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    Her parents sounds creepy and crazy. I hope she can move on to a normal life and won't repeat the same mistakes with her own children in the future. I don't see how any of this is her fault.

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    Not knowing all the details I will just assume that the court made the right decisions. Sound like real winners *shudder*.
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    Whoa...those parents sound a little crazy. I'm guessing there would probably have been some way the courts could verify the Skype stuff. Sounds like the courts made the right decision.
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    Yes assuming what she presented is true her parents are crazy. She made the right move (a sad one but the right one)

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