My sister gets hassled sometimes...she said that when someone asks her bluntly, "Why don't you have kids?" she sometimes just wants to say, "I can't!" and pretend to cry because it's so rude when someone who doesn't really know her asks. She & her husband are so happy in their lives the way they are....makes total sense to me!
I do think people are judged who do not have children. Someone on my FB just posted a total rant about how people treat them because they do not want children. I do not think it is a religious issue, but more of a lifestyle issue. Most all of my friends either have children or do not have children because they can not, or are single. I do not have any friends who just do not want children, but I would not, not be friends with someone for that reason. I just do not happen to know anyone that fits into that category.
I still find all this surprising. I have a lot of friends who don't have kids because they don't want them. They are pretty happy!
I think that like any minority they absolutely are judged on occasion- or subjected to stupid or thoughtless comments or assumptions. I have a few friends who choose to be child free - they have awesome lifestyles that I feel a twitch of envy for on occasion. I've always known I wanted kids but what other people want doesn't bother me in the least- I understand it even if I felt differently.
I honestly don't get why anyone else would care (other than maybe their parents and siblings) whether anyone else wants to have kids. If my neighbor or coworker or whoever doesn't want kids, how is that any skin off of my nose? I also agree that if someone feels that they don't want kids or can't handle kids, they shouldn't have kids. Good on 'em for knowing that about themselves.
Having said that, I will totally admit that I judge the Childless by Choice Movement. I've done a little reading on the topic and also had a CBC indentifying coworker, and I found them to be over the top nasty towards kids and parents. My coworker would freely complain that she hated seeing kids in public in totally normal places to see kids (like the grocery store) regardless of their behavior. I have also seen CBC people refer to mothers as "moos" who get "pignant" and "wombies" and what not. Gross. Way to dehumanize women by referring to them as animals and walking body parts. So I do admit that if some one tells me that they are childless, by choice, I don't judge, but if they tell me that they are Childless By Choice I do. I know I probably shouldn't judge all CBC people by the actions of some, so that's probably my bad, but that is my first reaction.
Yea, they are to the child free what PETA is to vegetarians.
I had a woman that identified with CFBC movement call me a breeder. Didnt bother me, but I did have a moment of "what would she think if I called her by some of the names that are associated with not having kids?
And Melissa, I agree that minority issues do get judged. I have been judged for having 4 kids, for extended bfing, for having my kids in private school. I just dont feel like I have the time to be bothered by it
Molly, Morgan, Mia and Carson
There is really a MOVEMENT?
Why don't people just not have kids and enjoy it? They aren't being deprived of any rights or anything....OY!