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Thread: Does Prom send damaging messages?

  1. #31
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    I'm sorry that you feel that my opinion on that particular dress is "gross". Its still my opinion, it is an ugly dress and you can tell its a terrible fabric If you find all clothing and fabrics and sparkles equally attractive, good on you. If we all had the same taste what a boring world of fashion it would be. I'm pretty secure in my fashion taste so I'm cool with being called names for the particular style that I have.

    I'd never have spent $500 on a dress in high school (had WAY different priorities for my hard earned money) but I would feel super rude calling you gross for doing so.

    And Gloria, the styles I'm seeing on the few prom pictures that I see in my FB news feed are all long, up here. Pretty much across the board.

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    I know some go way overboard around here, and probably did when I was in high school as well. I went twice - my junior and senior years - and had a blast the second year (my boyfriend jr year was awful and we broke up right after prom because I was really sick and couldn't go to the post-prom beach trip). Back then short dresses were in, but I have to say that, based on pictures my friends posted on FB, long was the way to go this year.

    I think my first dress was about $150, and my second dress was about $65. I kind of felt bad for the bigger girls, because the stores seriously carried about 2-3 different dresses in larger sizes - so there would be a bunch of them in the same dress. Now there seems to be a much better variety of pretty, flattering dresses.
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  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Potter75 View Post
    I'm sorry that you feel that my opinion on that particular dress is "gross". Its still my opinion, it is an ugly dress and you can tell its a terrible fabric If you find all clothing and fabrics and sparkles equally attractive, good on you. If we all had the same taste what a boring world of fashion it would be. I'm pretty secure in my fashion taste so I'm cool with being called names for the particular style that I have.

    I'd never have spent $500 on a dress in high school (had WAY different priorities for my hard earned money) but I would feel super rude calling you gross for doing so.

    And Gloria, the styles I'm seeing on the few prom pictures that I see in my FB news feed are all long, up here. Pretty much across the board.
    You can go ahead and call me gross, I would too as an adult. In high school that felt super important, then I grew up a bit.
    I dont know if I would wear any of those dresses, but I also wouldnt tell someone I wouldnt be caught dead in one, especially if that was what the parents or family could afford. The point of this debate is whether or not a dress is acceptable and has some modicum of class. It is about the message that prom sends to kids. If kids know that even adults, that are supposed to understand different finacial situations, are saying comments like I would not be caught dead in that then prom may be sending the wrong message.
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  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Potter75 View Post
    Frankly I wouldn't be caught dead in the blue sparkly $17 dress Bonita posted. So yeah, I think that I'm way better off looking better in a more expensive dress that has a modicum of style and class. Not necessarily the worlds most expensive dress, but not a $17 internet sparkle piece, either. Again, relative.
    It is a good thing then that you can afford very expensive dresses. There are many, many people that can not. It is very possible to have a wonderful time in a dress that did not cost hundreds of dollars.

    ~Bonita~

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    Quote Originally Posted by mom3girls View Post
    You can go ahead and call me gross, I would too as an adult. In high school that felt super important, then I grew up a bit.
    I dont know if I would wear any of those dresses, but I also wouldnt tell someone I wouldnt be caught dead in one, especially if that was what the parents or family could afford. The point of this debate is whether or not a dress is acceptable and has some modicum of class. It is about the message that prom sends to kids. If kids know that even adults, that are supposed to understand different finacial situations, are saying comments like I would not be caught dead in that then prom may be sending the wrong message.

    I was replying specifically to THIS comment, which I had quoted, so it should have been quite clear.

    As an adult, I know that it doesn't matter and if you can find a great deal, you are way better off than someone who spends thousands.
    Obvs I would never ever spend thousands. I also don't think that the "great deal" is ALWAYS the best thing. That is all I was saying. Somewhere between $17 and ugly and super expensive there can be a happy medium of classy and flattering that probably every family could come up with. That was my only point......that the rock bottom deal may NOT always be best for every child. To me that dress was not acceptable and did not have some "modicum of class". I acknowledge that everyone will have their own opinion on that. There are no kids on this debate board, so frankly I am not tailoring my reply to them, I'm debating with my fellow women, and will continue to phrase my replies as such. I don't need to call you gross as it would not make me feel good about myself, but thank you for the offer.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AlyssaEimers View Post
    It is a good thing then that you can afford very expensive dresses. There are many, many people that can not. It is very possible to have a wonderful time in a dress that did not cost hundreds of dollars.

    I never said a thing about what I can or would afford, other than to say that I would not spend $500 on a dress, so I will thank you not to make assumptions. Just because I dont think that that $17 number is pretty doesn't mean I can "afford very expensive dresses" Bonita so quit your assumptions. I spent $100 on a dress for a very dressy party for my husbands Christmas party this year and was THRILLED with my score, several friends have actually borrowed it since, its a fab dress.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Potter75 View Post
    that probably every family could come up with.
    I think you might not be fully aware how many truly poor people there are out there. There are kids in my husband's school and other schools I have heard of that the only good solid meals they eat are the meals they get at school. There are families that scrape and scour just to have food on the table. It might take them saving all year long to save up $100 for prom. That includes dress and everything else. They might only have $25 for a dress. Your circle of friends might only include super wealthy people, but that is not all there is in the world.

    ETA - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/0...n_1877197.html

    "For last year, the official poverty line was an annual income of $23,021 for a family of four. By total numbers, roughly 46.2 million people remained below the poverty line, unchanged from 2010."
    Last edited by AlyssaEimers; 05-13-2013 at 07:08 PM.
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    ~Bonita~

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Potter75 View Post
    I was replying specifically to THIS comment, which I had quoted, so it should have been quite clear.



    Obvs I would never ever spend thousands. I also don't think that the "great deal" is ALWAYS the best thing. That is all I was saying. Somewhere between $17 and ugly and super expensive there can be a happy medium of classy and flattering that probably every family could come up with. That was my only point......that the rock bottom deal may NOT always be best for every child. To me that dress was not acceptable and did not have some "modicum of class". I acknowledge that everyone will have their own opinion on that. There are no kids on this debate board, so frankly I am not tailoring my reply to them, I'm debating with my fellow women, and will continue to phrase my replies as such. I don't need to call you gross as it would not make me feel good about myself, but thank you for the offer.
    I understand that this is adults, that is why I am shocked that people would slam dresses that may be what kids could afford. Prom could very well be a very damaging message if girls thought they couldnt go and have fun without spending more money then what thier family could afford.
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    Quote Originally Posted by AlyssaEimers;
    Your circle of friends might only include super wealthy people, but that is not all there is in the world.
    Excuse me? I will refrain from engaging you any more on this subject, thank you.

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