Does Prom send damaging messages? - Page 5
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Thread: Does Prom send damaging messages?

  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Potter75 View Post
    Eh, I don't know, Rivergallery said it like it was a policy more about the principal than about grocery money. Most people I know would, over the course of the school year, be able to set aside, or find ways to put aside a few dollars here or there to save for some money for their child's prom dress if they wanted to. I will be honest and admit that maybe in other areas of the country one could find a fashionable dress for $25.....but around here that just is not realistic. I wouldn't want my child to feel like she was dressed utterly ridiculously just because I was unwilling to work hard, maybe babysit or sell some things on ebay, or do SOMETHING to help her look appropriate for an event that, like it or not, is an important event for many young girls. IF it were important to my daughter I would find a way, not to buy her a $1000 gown of course, but not to make her wear something out of the rag bin, either.

    I agree with you but when I went to homecoming I decided the day before to even go so a lot of dresses were on sale. I found a pretty dress at Macy*s for $10 if you can believe it!

    My prom dress was almost $400, though, lol.
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  2. #42
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    Oh and I don't feel like prom sends a bad message. It's a fun time for people to get dressed up and feel fabulous. Nothing wrong with feeling fabulous, boy or girl!

  3. #43
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    Melissa actually has a lot of friends outside of "super wealthy" people so I think that comment was uncalled for.

    I definitely understand that a lot of people can't afford 100+ dresses. I do agree that there is a way to still fit your budget and not look tacky. Each area of the country also has a general sense of what they feel is in style. Short dresses vs. long. Sparkly vs. non sparkly. Bright colors vs. pastels etc. I would not feel comfortable sending a teenager (if I had one right now) in one of those dresses. I would seek out second hand stores that can have very expensive dresses from 1 season before that are cheap.

    Around here, we also have lots of programs where truly in need people get to pick a free prom dress from donations. Dresses are GORGEOUS!
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  4. #44
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    You know... I think there are huge differences between not liking a dress for its qualities and thinking no one can have fun unless they like the same dress you do.

    So many assumptions going on.
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  5. #45
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    My daughter just went to her junior prom on the 4th. She wore one of my dresses from 2007. It cost me $60



    Her shoes were $30
    Hair & nails $50
    Corsage (gift from Grandpa)
    Bra $8
    Ticket $65

    I moved near the end of my junior year from a poor area to an affluent area. You would not believe the difference! Prom at my poor HS was $15/$20 couple for tickets. At the new HS $130/couple. I couldn't afford to go to the senior prom. There's just no way I could justify the cost as a senior or as a parent now.

    My mom made my prom dress. The pattern itself wasn't that much but the fabric and all the other supplies can really add up. (funny thing-another girl at prom had the exact same dress!)

    I wouldn't be against the idea of buying a dress on ebay, it's just that dress sizes are so different. I would have to try it on first. If I got one slightly too big my mom could alter it, but if it's too small, there is nothing I could do.

    There's just something about pampering yourself and dressing elegant for a day. It can be done on a beer budget or champagne.

  6. #46
    Mega Poster mom3girls's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KimPossible View Post
    You know... I think there are huge differences between not liking a dress for its qualities and thinking no one can have fun unless they like the same dress you do.

    So many assumptions going on.
    Assumptions maybe, or people pointing out the very attitude that can make the prom message damaging. This all started with Rivergallery saying what she would be willing to spend within her family budget, and people saying that there was not a way to fund a prom within that budget. That is where I pointed out that attitude.
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  7. #47
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    There's a group called Dresses for Jake's Dates that I follow on FB. Their son Jake died due to SIDS. His mom had been mulling around the idea of starting a dress donation group before he passed away. One of her friends suggested she start it up as a way to honor him. It's so wonderful to see pictures of the girls looking beautiful in the dress and accessories they get to pick out.
    Carolyn - 37
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  8. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by mommydearest View Post
    There's a group called Dresses for Jake's Dates that I follow on FB. Their son Jake died due to SIDS. His mom had been mulling around the idea of starting a dress donation group before he passed away. One of her friends suggested she start it up as a way to honor him. It's so wonderful to see pictures of the girls looking beautiful in the dress and accessories they get to pick out.
    We had a group similar to this at my high school. It was great
    Lisa
    Molly, Morgan, Mia and Carson

  9. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by mom3girls View Post
    Assumptions maybe, or people pointing out the very attitude that can make the prom message damaging. This all started with Rivergallery saying what she would be willing to spend within her family budget, and people saying that there was not a way to fund a prom within that budget. That is where I pointed out that attitude.
    I guess. But does that mean you have to like every dress? If you aren't saying anything mean or treating anyone differently at prom for having a dress you don't like then i don't think there is any harm. Or are we now saying that we all have to like the same clothes in order to be nice people.

  10. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica80 View Post
    Melissa actually has a lot of friends outside of "super wealthy" people so I think that comment was uncalled for.
    I did not say that Melissa only had wealthy friends. I was responding to the attitude that anyone that cared about their child would find a way to work hard and get their child an expensive dress. Saying that most families can find a way to buy a dress that is well over $25 is just not true. There are families that can not, and I believe that it is hurtful to say otherwise.

    ~Bonita~

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