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  1. #41
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    Gloria~I'm 32 and it took me 3+ years to conceive dd1. I started trying when I was 24. I had her when I was 28. I tried 1x for DD2 and got pregnant. She could have been having sex hundreds of times before getting pregnant.

  2. #42
    Posting Addict GloriaInTX's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica80 View Post
    Gloria~I'm 32 and it took me 3+ years to conceive dd1. I started trying when I was 24. I had her when I was 28. I tried 1x for DD2 and got pregnant. She could have been having sex hundreds of times before getting pregnant.
    Or she could have had sex once and gotten pregnant. There is nothing in the article to conclude either way other than the fact that it says it happened on several occasions. That doesn't sound like hundreds to me.
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  3. #43
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    I didn't say it couldn't happen once. You asked why she didn't get pregnant earlier. I gave you an example of regularly having sex that did not result in pregnancy.

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    wow, where to start?


    I can tell you that this is completely the group home's fault and whatever agency runs it. DH and I both worked in group homes, he worked with adults and i worked with kids up to 22 yrs old. They knew she was getting out. She should have been accounted for 24/7, with documentation. You can't just up and walk out of a group home without setting off door/window alarms. They did absolutely nothing to stop her, she should have been a 1 on 1 or literally constant contact.


    Saying the parents were neglectful or abandoned her is very offensive. I have a 15 yr old that i may have to put into a group home someday, and the only reason for doing that EVER is because it's in the child's/adult's best interest.

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    I didn't say all group home placements were abandonment....I said this one was.

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    Because?


    There is nothing to say that the adoptive parents knew anything about her getting out. I really don't think they knew. I can agree though that if they knew and did nothing, then they are also a big part to blame.

    Not everyone has a family that is there 100% and without knowing all the underlying issues it's really not fair to judge them for not visiting often, they could have been limited by the home, state, etc to how many times they could go. Plus, if the group home was covering up the fact that she wasn't there that would explain alot about why they weren't "in the know" about everything that was going on.

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    I didn't go back to this article so I don't know if it was there or another one I read but not that she just disappeared but she disappeared days at a time. DAYS! I contact my mom at least once a day and she lives around the corner with no delays. Are you saying that the group home said she was "in the shower" every time they called? They obviously didn't. That's neglectful. My daughter is 4 and is on the spectrum. I'm completely aware of what her future may hold and it wouldn't be no contact for days I can assure you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica80 View Post
    I didn't go back to this article so I don't know if it was there or another one I read but not that she just disappeared but she disappeared days at a time. DAYS! I contact my mom at least once a day and she lives around the corner with no delays. Are you saying that the group home said she was "in the shower" every time they called? They obviously didn't. That's neglectful. My daughter is 4 and is on the spectrum. I'm completely aware of what her future may hold and it wouldn't be no contact for days I can assure you.
    Not calling your adult child or parent every day does not make you legally neglectful. I call my mother every day, but I would wager a guess that at least 75% of adults do not call their parents on a daily basis.

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  9. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica80 View Post
    I didn't go back to this article so I don't know if it was there or another one I read but not that she just disappeared but she disappeared days at a time. DAYS! I contact my mom at least once a day and she lives around the corner with no delays. Are you saying that the group home said she was "in the shower" every time they called? They obviously didn't. That's neglectful. My daughter is 4 and is on the spectrum. I'm completely aware of what her future may hold and it wouldn't be no contact for days I can assure you.
    Ditto this, except that neither of my children is autistic. My Nana was in nursing homes on & off for over a decade, and one of us (my mom or two sisters) always called her on a daily basis to check on her & make sure that the home knew we were watching. I was 120 miles away but I could tell by her voice if something wasn't quite right, and I'd tell her to put someone else on the line to talk with me. If my child was in a group home, I would do the same unless there was a good reason for NOT doing daily calls, and then it would be weekly calls at a minimum. My husband & I call our moms on a weekly basis and they aren't in a home; we'd definitely call more if they were. And when my Nana stopped eating, the home she was in called my mom THAT AFTERNOON so that we not only knew about the situation but could try to help, but even if they hadn't called her, one of us would have found out that night when we called. This woman's home was negligent in letting her get out once, much less for days, but the fact that the parents didn't do anything about it reaks of abandonment to me. They either didn't care, or didn't care to know, either way it's abandonment.
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  10. #50
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    I know from first hand experience that when adults with special needs are placed in a home their relationship is not the same as the ones that most of us have with our mothers. All of these people are delayed, so whatever their functioning level is at is often times how they act emotionally too, if not younger. The purpose behind the home is to give them independence and freedom, mom calling every day gives a VERY different message. Mom cant tell them she just loves to chat with them, like our moms can. Just like when we have a 6 year old these moms have to show through their actions and words what message they wish to convey. An adult in a group home may act out if they feel their independence is false.

    Again, ordering an abortion for this woman without knowing where the holes were in the care of this woman is government sanctioned abortion. Social services needs to appoint a guardian ad litum that can do an evalution of the whole story
    Last edited by mom3girls; 11-02-2012 at 01:00 AM.
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